Is your penis big enough? Or not?
I feel a rant coming on, in response to another thread Does size matter?. But a very practical rant! :D
We tend to think about penis size the same as we do clothes sizes: Small, Medium, Large, XL, XXL etc. so we think medium (average) is low down on the scale.
It’s a weird thing the way our brains work. Guys hear ‘your penis is average’ and their minds think ‘that means it’s small’. Most of the threads asking what ‘average is’ are not looking for the true answer, which is a range of sizes that the vast percentage of guys fall within; they are wanting a single number for length and a single number for girth, by which they can judge/measure themselves.
Once they have worked out that number (near as can be determined from reliable sources 5.6” BPEL x 4.6 EG), they decide that if they are below that, they are ‘small’, even though 50% or so of guys are below that. If you take single numbers to be the ‘average’, you can be low average (a bit smaller in length and girth) or high average (a bit larger in length and girth) but still be average. Or you may have a long thin penis or a short fat penis, and still be average.
Volume is a much better way to measure penis size, but our minds don’t work on volume unless we are filling the petrol/gas tanks in our cars. So the whole question of size and where we fit in the range is a difficult one to quantify, and if we have any penis insecurities (we are at Thunder’s Place after all, so the chance is high), then we will automatically just think we are small, whether we are or not. (It doesn’t help that we look at our own penis from the most disadvantageous angle, and see porn from the most advantageous visual angles. Or that women see our penis most often from better angles than we do)!
OK, so how do women think about penis size? How do you think about breast size? It’s not a perfect comparison because women generally know whether they have a small, medium, large or extra large vagina, which changes their preferences. And most of the time they want a penis that fits it well enough to not need lots of lube every time just to get it in, that doesn’t make their jaw ache 2 minutes into a blowjob, that allows for a quickie or sex before sleeping without knowing they will be walking like John Wayne in the morning because they are sore. Because most guys are ‘average’, and most vaginas are ‘average’, they are usually an acceptable fit for an active sex life.
So why do we think women want a bigger penis than ‘average’? The truth comes back to that question ‘How do you think about breast size?’. For many, it’s a visual turn-on. More than that (because women won’t see your penis until you get it out, unless it hangs impressively down the leg of your tight pants), it’s a confidence thing. Women invest a lot of their self-confidence in how they look. Women with big breasts tend to be more confident - even if they are not hugely attractive facially, they still know their breasts will turn men on, which gives them an advantage over other women and makes them confident. Guys with a big penis are often more confident approaching women. Confidence is sexy!
So how important is the ‘big’ penis?
For confidence, it really helps for many guys. Which unfortunately maybe skews the figures a little in what women think is ‘normal’. A guy with a ‘big’ dick is more likely to be happy trying to get a woman to have sex quickly. An average or small guy may wait until he is sure she ‘likes’ him before turning on the sexual taps.
For ‘one night stands’, a big penis is good for both the guy (confidence) and the woman (visual excitement, physical stimulation even if the guy isn’t great in bed, boasting rights with friends, not likely to be having very regularly sex so - relative to vagina size - soreness is less of an issue).
A big penis is (and this is why we really want one guys…) good for us. We feel more sensation whatever size vagina we put it in. We can stand at the urinals and feel confident. We don’t have to try to hide it in the locker-room or showers at the gym. If/when penis size comes up in discussion with women or friends, we don’t feel shy or awkward. It’s just one less thing in life to worry or think about.
But, a bit like breast size, a big penis is less important in a long term committed relationship or marriage. Confidence is still important, but is shown in different ways. Most women are married to guys with an ‘average’ penis, just as most guys are married to women with ‘average’ breasts. It’s not a major issue as long as the person doesn’t go on about it all the time (lack of confidence). A relationship based solely on penis or breast size is doomed, as even the most sexually active couple spend only a very small percentage of their lives together having sex.
Couples learn to please each other sexually in time, with whatever ‘equipment’ they have; it may sound trite, but the lack of a penis never stopped lesbians enjoying sex, and big ‘strap-ons’ are not the mainstay of lesbian sex.
So how important is a big penis?
It’s as important as you want to make it.
We kid ourselves even if we say we are enlarging our penis for our sexual partner(s). We are doing it for ourselves, even if our reason to ourselves is ‘I want to give my wife more satisfaction’, it’s because it makes us feel good to make someone else feel good. PE is for us, not for ‘them’, whoever ‘they’ may be.
If it makes you feel good to exercise your penis and make it larger (that’s why you’re here, right?) then go for it. Don’t question if it can be done, or why you are doing it. Just get on with it. And if for some reason it doesn’t work out for you, don’t worry about it - develop your body, or your personality, or your musical ability, or your earning potential, or work to become the next Shakespeare or Abraham Lincoln, or whatever it takes to give you more confidence - a penis, let alone a big penis, is not essential for a great relationship or great sex, or to be a superb and valuable member of the human race. But it is a bonus, and a nice thing to have, however unessential. Although I often wish I’d put the years I’ve spent on PE into other areas of my life…. :)