I don’t know what the drinking age is in your area, but I think for the woman a glass of wine does wonders for relaxing her. I don’t know what it is about alcohol and woman…but it does seem to relax their inhibitions. Women, especially young woman sometimes (like guys) think too damn much during sex. For a guy, it can result in worry, which results in loss of erection. For a gal, it can prevent them from cumming. The art of sexuality for a woman is the art of totally letting go of all control. So here’s the winning combination… a sober guy and a girl with one or two mild drinks. More than that is no good, just enough to relax her. Once she is relaxed, proceed with nice moderate to slow speed like I said in my last post. Forget about what she is telling you to do as far as speed…she may have it all wrong! Really, I learned this early on (I’m 46) by watching women masturbate. The ones that really can get themselves off, tend to set a moderate to slow pace and keep that pace. The ones who can’t really get themselves off tend to “chase”their orgasm…that is as they get aroused they go faster and harder. This causes a numbing of sensation which then causes them to go harder and faster to try and catch their decreasing arousal. Finally they can’t keep up the pace, or just get frustrated as their arousal drops drastically. Remember, just cuz’ shes telling what to do doesn’t mean she knows what to do. I think the fact that she isn’t cumming tells me she doesn’t know what she needs! You take the reins here, do what I said, get her one glass of wine, have a few laughs, relax, don’t take the whole thing so seriously, be playful. Tell her you just want to enjoy being in her,and it’s not important if either of you cum. Of course this is just to put her at ease, as well as yourself. Now that you’ve set the psychological tone you can proceed. Take your time with her, kiss her deeply and long. Slowly tease her out of her clothes. Suck her nipples and mouth gently and take time. Get her to the point she is desperately trying to get your pants off. Once you are both naked, take dirty to her (if she likes it) tell her you are going to fuck her nice and slow and enjoy her pussy as long as you want to. Then put her on her back and rub you cock against the outside of her pussy until she is begging for you to put it in. Actually make her beg!!! Make her say it, for many women it is a huge turn on to be made to be slutty (they love it!). Then take your time and fuck her slow. She will try to speed you up…DON’T DO IT!!! Continue at a moderate to slow pace until she cums. If she is just on the edge but won’t go over…DON’T PANIC…keep the same pace and experiment with the kicker, the thing that will put her over. For my gal (I think most women) it varies, what works today may not work tomorrow, but will work at some other time. I’ll tell you some of the things that work for my gal.
1 Gently finger her ass, (sometimes she doesn’t like it, other times she begs to be fuck anally…women are moving targets!)
2 Pound her hard. (time limit here, refer to the first post)
3 Talk dirty to her. This takes experimentation to see what ‘gets’ to her. Sometimes she likes for me to play “daddy”. Sometimes its her being “mommy” (god I love that one!) Sometimes its me asking her how would she like to see some stranger gal suck me off, or watch me fuck her. The thing is, like I said what may totally turn her on today, may turn her off tomorrow, like I said,’moving target’!
4 Suck or bite her neck, kiss her, suck her nipples, gently pull her hair.
These are just some of the things that work on my gal, actually one of these will work on most women. The key to being a good lover is to do your exploration with your gal. Sometimes you will get lucky and you can ask,and she can tell you, but not always. Its worth a try. The main thing is to take the anxiety down 5 notches! This is not hostage negotiations, if you don’t get it perfect today… so what? Go about with an attitude of sexy playfulness, enjoy exploring your woman’s mind and body. What fun it is to explore all over her to find what gets her hot, its great to probe her mind and find her nasty little secrets. Do you know how many woman have fantasies about being “taken against their will” or getting fucked by fido, or doing their dads or moms? This is all stuff that is the hidden sexuality of women that once you tap into it, you take the whole thing to another level no one may have ever taken them to. Most of these fantasies are just that fantasies. Many women get off on fantasizing about being raped, I doubt any really want to be raped for real, whole different ball game.
So have FUN!!! Be safe, wrap that rascal,don’t get her pregnant, and start enjoying this process instead of turning into a chore to be worried about.
Regards,
Sparkyx
