Hypersexuality And PE

Hey guys

I’ve posted a couple of threads in the past couple of days on how I’m trying to break my sexual addiction. Too much porn, and urges that put me in situations I don’t want to be in just for sexual gratification. I admit it- not proud but I admit I have a problem and I want to change to be a better person, living a sober life.

So my question is do you think PE’ing will hinder my focus on sobriety? I’m doing PE for myself now, not for anyone else like my ego was in the past. I’m using this as a way to focus my energy towards a goal of personal growth and reaching greater potentials, almost metaphorically. However I’m a bit nervous that when I jelq or use my extender, or pump, that it might associate this with sexual urges like in the past. I would hate for my addiction to ruin my PE journey.

So I know it’s hard to understand since you guys aren’t going through this but any feedback, thoughts, or analysis would help. I perhaps have a decision to make on whether or not it’s healthy for me to continue.

And then side note question (if I do continue) - would it be bad to pump and use an extender on the same days or on alternate days (1 day pump, 1 day extender along with jelq routine)? Would pumping be good to maintain my current girth or would it affect the extender use?

Thanks for helping on both questions!

Peace and love
G4G

I’ve found that PE is such a penis-centric activity that it only increases my libido. Also, all of the increased blood flow ups my libido.

Hmmm true Don…so it could a slippery slope for me?

I’d like to think that I could focus more on the reward of focused energy that is directly helping me be healthier and bigger, metaphorically showing me that I can redirect my energy towards positive things that will help me reach my personal goals

I’m trying to let go of the ego side of my personal PE journey as that was connected and probably contributed to some of the past burdens that came from my sex addiction. The only thing is can I actually change my mindset and do this for myself without the ego pushing me towards wanting to show off potential growth in a promiscuous way?..

I’m not addicted to porn per se, but I’m hugely addicted to showing off on cam. It’s seriously a sickness and I always feel less of a person afterwards; I get some sort of adrenaline rush by having a girl watch me and talk to me while I’m…well, you know.

I’m somewhat new to PE. I have found - much to my surprise - that somehow PE does not encourage me in that direction. Somehow, even though it increases my libido, I’m now more focused on flirting with and bedding my wife.

I don’t know why this is so; but it has been true with me.

I do think your playing with fire and I’m glad you came to this on your own. I didn’t want to say it in your other thread because I would never push someone away from Thunder’s because I feel we can all grow in more ways then our pants here but I did think this too.

Well, if you pump then you need to have an erection, thus you have to be horny to do so, then all those thoughts come back to your head. Listen, there is no such thing as sobriety from your sexuality; first you need to stop porn. Try a month without porn, I know it is not easy, but you should try, if you need to have some visual excitement to have an erection in the pump go see some magazines with models on bikinis or fashion, believe me there is no problem in that, it may be cheating, but in a healthier way.

Jelqs and PE helped me reach long streaks of no porn and no masturbation, streaks that i can only dream about these days.

I can relate to your post big time and to be honest PE hasn’t helped curb my obsessions and sexual urges and I’m still finding myself in bad situations.

I have started to realize it’s mostly a ego issue for me and that’s what I need to work on for now I still do PE and find it sometimes helps with the urges but generally I’m more horny because my penis is healthier. Understanding that it is a psychological issue rather than a physical issue is important and will help your PE journey along with the sexual urges.

Good points everyone

I’m definitely going to see how things go to determine any correlation with my sexual urges either increasing or diminishing coupled with PE.

TheTerrible- yes you hit the nail in the head in terms of ego. I think a lot of times we are doing PE and growing our dicks based on the increased self worth or value placed on having a big dick. It comes from our egos. Our ego wants a big dick. Maybe our SO’d love it but it never feels good enough to our EGO. Therefore I’m trying to detach my ego with the PE process. Because if I do it based on ego, then my ego based hypersexuality will want to act out based on showing off my increased size.

We should focus more on living ourselves for our own inner peace and also to want to improve for OURSELVES! To be the best me I can be. I’m not doing my PE journey for anyone else like I was in the past. I have to do this journey for me. And I’m going to look at this journey from a different and egoless (to the best of my abilities) perspective: I will metaphoricallly use my PE growth to symbolize workin on myself as a whole. If I can focus my energy on something that makes me healthier, if I can put in dedication to something and show results for it, if I can accomplish something that IMPROVES the current version of myself- well then I can apply this same theory and work towards other avenues in my life, i.e. mental clarity, finding inner peace, meditation, going to the gym to improve physically and get healthier etc.

So this is a new outlook for me now and maybe it can also get other people thinking about a similar mentality to see if it proves to be a healthier way of approaching PE especially if they struggle with hypersexuality or sex addiction.

One of the most frequent reasons I will take a deconditioning break is because my mind gets to wrapped up in all of the sexual nature of what it is that we do. What it is that we want to do after completing our current campaign of PE. The combination of all of these thoughts and the physical practice leads to a lot of use of your libido because you spend a lot of time with erections and a lot of time fighting to not orgasm or orgasming.

If you have a porn addiction some time away from PE is probably recommended. The same for a sex addiction. This has been my experience.

Good stuff! I truly appreciate this thread & the honest thoughts expressed. Unfortunately, there isn’t one single ideology that fully explains or helps one deal with any given compulsion although it’s encouraging to see others fighting the fight to get clean & sober or at minimum to better understand themselves. Much of the culture does not yet grasp that it’s one thing to dabble in porn at will and quite another to be dominated by unwanted behaviors as some experience when coping with sex addiction. I think understanding is beginning to emerge as the research piles up documenting the unprecedented addictive power that internet porn and hookup apps bring to the table but it’s a very slow process and many don’t see the dangers until they’re trapped. I digress.

For me, TP is a double-edged sword. It’s given me the tools to address what I believed was one of the biggest inadequacies I had. In the midst of my success on the physical side of the PE coin, there was a tremendous amount of acceptance of my own body I came to have as I absorbed thread after thread where real guys related that size wasn’t everything. Over time both tracks have been cathartic & healing and my inadequacy demons are much subdued these days as a result.

My addiction demons however march to a very different drummer. Unfortunately, TP can be a huge trigger for my addiction (and thoughtfulgold capsulized aspects of this so well). Not trying to tell anyone else what to do, but I find that I have to stay away from threads detailing sexual exploits or even progress pics or I’m triggered to go straight down the rabbit hole. And thanks to whoever made it possible to turn off avatars (some of which by themselves push me into acting out).

When I initially got laser focused on PE, I had several extended periods of sobriety and I thought, hey PE fixes EVERYTHING! Nawp. Twas a welcome, if temporary respite but the pain and/or defects that drive anyone’s addiction must be dealt with before the demons can be truly exorcised. Continuing to actively work on it, however, glad to be on several simultaneous journies with this unique group of guys.

QL