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The big penis and mens' sexual health source, increasing penis size around the world.

Dick Control: A Primer

Originally Posted by Josh 14-11
When the doctor tests your reflexes, he usually does so by having your dangle your legs over the side of the examining table. The test won’t work if you tense your knee, so he tells you to relax before hitting under the knee cap with that nifty little rubber mallet. If reflexes are good, your lower leg kicks out.

When the urologist wants to check the nerves “down below,” he checks the “bulbocavernosus reflex”:

As long as he doesn’t do so by smacking me in the balls with a little rubber mallet! :eek:


Running a Massive Co-Front.

Excellent job cheeva and everyone else in this thread.

Guys, he is not making this stuff up or exaggerating. If anything he is downplaying the experience, a lot, so as not to freak you out or risk disbelief. The effect you can have on your partner with this stuff is beyond belief for most. Now we are certainly not talking just being able to last a long time. But if you can’t last, and do so without effort, the rest isn’t going to happen. When he talks of Becoming a Hindu Love God he is just giving you the faintest of tastes. It won’t happen overnight but if you want it and are willing to work at it stick with what the guys in this thread are talking about and eventually you will get there.

It took me a long time to fade into obscurity and now I toss it away. I know it sounds hokey but this place is important to me and I genuinely care for you guys, all 101,712 of you. The couple of hundred that actively post I care for even more. :inlove: Cheeva and the guys have been doing a seriously kick ass compassionate job of addressing this topic. This combination of events finds me linking an ooold thread out of obscurity. I want to give you guys an idea of what is possible as well as harp on moral responsibility.

Tantric sex

Please don’t PM me on Tantra related stuff. If you find my descriptions in the above linked thread in any way helpful, informative, entertaining, or motivational, then I am very glad and un-obscurifying myself is worth it . Cheeva’s “how to” posts in this thread are excellent and better than anything I would hack out for you.


Running a Massive Co-Front.


Last edited by iamaru : 09-10-2008 at .

After all my lurking and reading in this place for the last three months, I must conclude that Cheeva has placed himself on the top three of my favourite writers. Thanks for the excellent insight you provide cheeva.

I’ve been through this thread (esp. Cheeva’s postings in particular) several times. I’ve attempted to wade through Werner’s ballooing thread. I looked at iamaru’s links—particularly the article on “Biological basis for tantric sex.”

I’m still a bit confused about “spreading the energy.” Is there anything neurological/physiological going on here, or is it just a mind game so one isn’t focused on glans/shaft sensations? After all, Cheeva wraps up his OP by saying, “Oh yeah, and ultimately, it’s all in the mind!”

It reminds me in some ways of birthing classes I once took with my wife. (No insult to women—“dick control” is no where near giving birth to a baby!) The breathing technique they taught was to help distract from the pain of contractions. So it makes sense that concentrating on breathing can also distract from pleasurable neurological impulses.

Maybe there’s another corollary. Proper breathing during labor is to maximize downward diaphragmatic pressure at the correct time. Perhaps the same is true of an aroused male. Maybe controlled breathing could increase OR DECREASE internal pressure on the prostate and other sex organs at just the right time.

However, when the discussion starts getting into the Eastern mysticism of sending energy up and down the spine, etc., then I start wondering, “where’s the science behing this?” Maybe the yogis are superimposing a “spiritual” interpretation on something that can happen physiologically and/or psychologically apart from chakras, etc.

I don’t want to start a whole discussion on kundalini again—I'd just like to discuss the medical/scientific basis of breathing and “spreading energy” when it comes to dick control.


Last edited by Josh 14-11 : 09-12-2008 at .

The “science” as you call it is a natural body sensation. Nothing strange or unfamiliar about it. Anyone who’s ever felt a rush of energy coursing through his/her body, be it orgasmic, blissful or otherwise in nature, heck even someone else’s anger that literally “hits you in the gut”, all that is energy, too. Feelings are. Anything is. So yes, it’s all energy and it’s all in the mind.

Anyhow when you say “medical” do you mean “western medical” or really _medical_ (as in eastern, western and other ways of proliferating the self-healing of/in the patient/client) ?

Ys

Originally Posted by ys
The “science” as you call it is a natural body sensation. Nothing strange or unfamiliar about it. Anyone who’s ever felt a rush of energy coursing through his/her body, be it orgasmic, blissful or otherwise in nature, heck even someone else’s anger that literally “hits you in the gut”, all that is energy, too. Feelings are. Anything is. So yes, it’s all energy and it’s all in the mind.

Anyhow when you say “medical” do you mean “western medical” or really _medical_ (as in eastern, western and other ways of proliferating the self-healing of/in the patient/client) ?

Ys

Ys,

I’m not looking for a western, AMA-approved explanation. But while I believe in metaphysics, “dick control” is more than feelings or controlling a nebulous energy. There is a physiological component to edging, orgasm, and everything in between. E.g., when you talk about bliss or anger, there are hormones involved, whether dopamine or adrenalin. Something is going on within the physical body. Most of Cheeva’s OP is describing biofeedback to learn better control of specific pelvic muscles. There’s one aspect I’m still trying to grasp. Namely, what is going on physiologically when one is “spreading the charge” or “stirring and swirling” a ball of energy.

I thought the essay on “Biological basis of tantric sex” would be helpful. However, it talks about experiments with monkey brains during sex, and then jumps forward to tantric philosophy… without much neurological, hormonal, or muscular explanation to connect the two.

Cheeva’s OP says if you don’t understand this part of dick control, then skip it. Maybe I should just skip it. After all, I find the rest of it very helpful and pragmatically useful. But if anyone can chime in with some basic physiology/anatomy of “stirring and swirling the energy,” I’d appreciate it.

So what you are saying here is, that, when you can feel OTHER PEOPLE’S EMOTIONS in your gut, it is THEIR hormones ? Now that’s interesting.. “Nurse, bring me an emotional IV, fast! The guy in front of him is going to blow up anytime soon now!” ;)

Anyhow, enough fun for now (yeah right ;P ):
“Spreading” is just this: Spreading. You intend to spread it, relax and MOVE IT AROUND, by sheer will in the beginning or naturally when you have gotten used to it.

Now is this “energy”, “emotions”, plain hormones or a special case of selfhypnosis ?
Who knows (even though I got an answer that works beautifully for myself which is the former).

It doesn’t make a difference in either case. You will it to be and so be it. Sounds like a magical formula, but yes this is how it works.
You’re taking a run and after mentioned 5 or a little more minutes your body says “Ah, please, let’s stop now.” (or “Let’s take a break, like, right now!”).. so you WILL IT to keep going past that plateau and after a few minutes running becomes increasingly easier. Same thing, you will it to be and so be it.

And yes, you don’t “need” this part at all. Why not just suppose you can go on forever during sex and simply stick with this (at least for now) (and yes, this is yet again the same.. You will it to be and so be it.).

All I can say is that the first time I STRONGLY felt that it’s actually “energy” moving around was when I had first kept going on for way over 30 minutes.. I was totally unrelaxed at the time, except for when I came close to ejaculation. The first few times I got at avoided that point (by staying BELOW the plateau, relaxation, breathing, basically WILLPOWER) I got some kind of hot flashes, a feeling like liquid lava was pouring above and at the same time within my skin (mainly at the back first, up the spine or “sushumna” as it is usually called in the field of energy medicine), later throughout my head, even later down the front of my chest (“avoiding” / going around the heart to meet up again at the solar plexus).. and then finally down into my belly.. at which point I could decide to let it flow back to where I felt the energy flow “started”.. or just send it on another round back up the spine again.

Obviously this was nothing, but simply playing around with that weird new thing I had just discovered for myself. Mind you I hadn’t read on any of those topics EVER BEFORE other than Werner’s most basic explanation of the microcosmic orbit. But I made sure to read up on it once I realized that something was going on that just didn’t fit my back-then worldview. I had to sift through a lot of bullshit obviously.. It’s the internet after all, and then there are lots of people trying to make a buck from something this natural.. or religious followers.. or whatever floats their boat.

Still, the basics always were in plain sight (and always have been, now that I knew what to look for including when going through old memories).

And it all started with going for just a little longer, staying below the plateau until (from today’s point of view) the energy flow got so strong that it could be felt, _despite_ of the (from today’s point of view) general lack of energy flow.

I hope this little story “back down ys’ memory lane” can help you and others understand this even if just a little better.

Get the energy flowing and you WILL start feeling it, once you first got over the critical threshold.

No need to believe in anything, just do the breathing and “mind exercises” as beautifully written down by cheeva and Werner and you’ll be fine :)

Ys

Originally Posted by ys
All I can say is that the first time I STRONGLY felt that it’s actually “energy” moving around was when I had first kept going on for way over 30 minutes.. I was totally unrelaxed at the time, except for when I came close to ejaculation. The first few times I got at avoided that point (by staying BELOW the plateau, relaxation, breathing, basically WILLPOWER) I got some kind of hot flashes {Emphasis added.}
Ys

Just a point of clarification. The first time this happened to you, you were not relaxed during edging, except when you came close to ejaculation (PONR), and then you relaxed and were flooded with a hot feeling, etc.? I thought the idea was to stay relaxed the entire time…

Also, you mention a feeling like liquid lava pouring over you. Should I consider Lava soap as a lubricant?
{Joke… just a joke.}

Josh, great questions re: spreading. I also wonder about the psycho-physiological basis for this stuff. It’s kind of like PE—we’re out here on the experiential fringe figuring things out on our own, with the help of some “ancient eastern knowledge” and a bunch of anecdotal reports combined with our own experience. I’ll chime in with my perspective on it when I get more time. I need to formulate my thoughts a bit…In the mean time, if you’re really interested in understanding this “energy” stuff better, I HIGHLY recommend that you get Julie Henderson’s little book “The Lover Within:Opening to Energy in Sexual Practice.” It’s very pragmatic, nuts and bolts, and it’s well-written and researched. It’s a treasure trove of good info and exercises. Really. And it’s available on amazon. :)

and ys, thanks so much for picking up the slack! :up:

josh,

Quote
Just a point of clarification. The first time this happened to you, you were not relaxed during edging, except when you came close to ejaculation (PONR), and then you relaxed and were flooded with a hot feeling, etc.? I thought the idea was to stay relaxed the entire time…


Yep, that’s the ideal. I am by far no ideal person though, never have been and (hopefully!) never will. Some people can stay relaxed more easily than others (I guess). I wasn’t one of them back then, so I did the best I could at the time. It’s about the fun and achieving your personal goal(s), not following some prelaid plan, that when A + B = outcome C. It just doesn’t work that way :)

The reason why it doesn’t? It’s between your ears (or mine.. or cheeva’s). People are different. The good old YMMV is alive and kicking even with this literally ages old ancient stuff ;)

Quote
Also, you mention a feeling like liquid lava pouring over you. Should I consider Lava soap as a lubricant?


You could.. I wouldn’t recommend it though ;)

On a more serious note and for the people that may have had some experience with eg. Reiki or other energy stuff: It’s the feeling when *tada* kundalini burns away “blockages” (i.e. slow-moving energy as in memories and feeling people hold onto sometimes). The feeling of cleansing fire consuming and clearing (thus healing) the darker spots in your energy body.

The more clear your pathways are, the easier the energy can travel right through you (your body, etc.. The Shiva Shakti idea for the hindu people.. Or Gaia HigherSelf for other belief system.. Or any other of the myriads of ways that this has been interpreted as in many religions).

cheeva,

Quote
and ys, thanks so much for picking up the slack!


What slack? There was slack involved here? I want some! NOW! ;)

Ys

Originally Posted by cheeva
I’ll chime in with my perspective on it when I get more time. I need to formulate my thoughts a bit…

Great! I look forward to your input, when you have the time.

I find it kind of difficult to kegel without contracting the PC muscle / anal region.. Is there any connection between the advice cheeva gave in the article about “The Anal Clench” and the simultaneous contraction myself and (I’ve heard) many others experience?

Originally Posted by iDare
I find it kind of difficult to kegel without contracting the PC muscle / anal region.. Is there any connection between the advice cheeva gave in the article about “The Anal Clench” and the simultaneous contraction myself and (I’ve heard) many others experience?

Good question. I’ve wondered the same thing since I seem to have a difficult time differentiating between the different muscle groups in order to exercise them separately.

I have a sensation that I am learning to contract mostly the BC when I lean a little bit forward (sitting position)

Back to the topic .. I have come upon a book named Penis of Steel.. It’s sold on a commercial website as an e-book.but like many e-books you can find it with a quick torrent search .it has a chapter about ejaculation control.. I highly recommend it.it features some of the stuff Cheeva mentioned in the article.. The most common advice I find is.. “Stop focusing on ejaculation. Instead start focusing on your partner.”.. Stopping, Knowing your arousal levels, Breathing slowly, Knowing your goal.. All of them are crucial..

Thanks for all the great advice, Cheeva! Keep up the good work.

Here is an article that may serve as a good reference, particularly the sections on the Levitor Ani and External Sphincter: Anatomy and Neurocontrol of the Pelvic Floor. I’m pretty sure the pudendal nerve plays a big role in what goes on when we short circuit or override the instinctual impulse to ejaculate. It’s a somatic nerve that passes through all of the muscle groups of the lower pelvis and out to the tip of the penis.

I don’t think you need to completely isolate the various muscles of the pelvic floor—they are all intimately related. However, I do think it’s important to practice centering contractions in various locales and getting a feeling for the difference between “pushing” and “pulling.” I think the “stirring and swirling” thing alluded to briefly in the OP can help with this, so I’ll try and expand on it a little.

It might be helpful to start off thinking in terms of three centers to focus contractions on: The prostate, the tail bone (coccyx), and the root or bulb of the penis (or the point where the perineum meets the anus.) Since hopefully everyone has been doing kegels, let’s start with isolating the root. Do these exercises flaccid to begin with—I think this way it’s easier to focus on the muscles involved and tune into the direction of force. You can do these sitting or standing. Start by doing a kegel, then continue to clench harder until you are involving your anus and all of the pelvic muscles. Now, holding the full pelvic clench, try and “pump” the area right at the bulb—contract that area harder, then “release” without releasing the overall pelvic contraction. This should activate the whole perineum and you should feel (if not see) your flaccid penis twitch a little in response. Your penis should pull up (or feel like it’s pulling up) or maybe even turtle a little when you contract the area, then relax back out when you “release.” That’s the nerves responding to stimuli (let’s call the feeling of that nervous reaction “energy.”) Now release completely, relax, and repeat. Once you’ve got the hang of isolating the perineal center while doing a full pelvic clench, play around with churning, pushing, and pulling the “energy.” Try and do little circles, then “move” the “energy” up to the tip of the penis. With practice, you should actually be able to feel this, and it requires only very slight, subtle muscular movements of the isolated area. You’ll notice that a lot of it is in the brain—you are focusing your awareness on the area, your muscles respond to your brain’s commands/suggestions, and the nerves in turn respond.

OK, now let’s do the tail bone. Begin with an anal clench focusing on the posterior side. Try and pull your tail bone in as you slowly increase the force of the contraction to again encompass all of the pelvic floor muscles, including the BC and PC. Now, fully clenched, concentrate on the muscles surrounding your tail bone and STIR. It should really feel like you are stirring your tail bone—I mean you are actually, physically moving it around.You should be able to feel it moving if you place your hand back there. It should also feel mildly pleasant, but with the location of the pleasure centered in and around your tail bone and up your spine slightly, not in your perineum or penis. Again, clench and “release” this area as you stir while holding the overall pelvic contraction. Also, continue to move the overall contraction further up the sphincter and Levitor Ani until you feel a mildly pleasant sensation in your prostate area—if you clench this deeply, you will in fact be giving your prostate a mild internal massage by squeezing it gently. Then move the focus/nerve response/”energy” back down to the tip of the tailbone and up again while you continue to stir.

If you had a hard time feeling the prostate’s involvement in the above exercise, try doing an anal clench without isolating any particular area, then continue to strengthen the clench so it goes deeper and deeper. Your anus should be pulled up. Continue to squeeze harder and tighter, then bear down/push from above gently at the same time. Now relax and repeat. Do you feel a mildly pleasant, possibly “weird” sensation several inches up and inside as you clench and release? If so, that’s your prostate. If not, maybe some others who know what I’m talking about can try to describe isolating this area. Once you’ve isolated it, take the approach described in the above exercises and begin the pelvic clench from that area. If you have a hard time beginning there, then do the tailbone version, but once the clench is in full effect move to the prostate area and practice “pumping” it.

One further note: Practice isolating each side of the muscles involved as well, particularly the sphincters. This will help later when you get into “stirring and swirling,” below…

OK, now we can begin to talk about “stirring and swirling.” Basically, try doing the above exercises but without doing the overall pelvic contraction. In other words, you are relaxed, but you are moving the focus of your attention to one or another of the three centers and gently moving the “energy” around. The actual muscle contractions should be very slight—just sufficient to activate the nerves. With practice, you should be able to do this using virtually only the mind. But just let whatever happens physically happen as your body follows your mental focus, and stay as relaxed as possible (when I say “relaxed” I mean overall—obviously there will be isolated muscle movement and contractions as you do the exercises.) Now, once you’ve played around with each of the areas separately, move from one to the other. With a little practice you should start to feel that “ball of energy” thing going on. What’s really interesting to me is that it can be intensely (yet subtly) pleasurable, and there is some kind of arousal happening, but the external genitals are not involved directly at all. You’re exploring the sources and foundations of arousal, yet the penis itself is not directly involved at all. Eventually, subtle pressure starts to build up (the “ball” is “inflating” or becoming more dense, perhaps), at which point you can pull that energy up and into your body through the tail bone, or push it out to the body of the penis. If you focus on pushing the ball out, you should start to become at least slightly erect. If you have not ejaculated for several days you can even do hands free masturbation, even to the point of ejaculation if you wish. It is also possible to have internal orgasms in the same manner.

If you practice this for a few weeks, I think you’ll discover some very interesting and profound-yet-subtle things about your body, your arousal patterns, and what is possible with energy. The sensations you experience may be intensely pleasurable, yet qualitatively different from anything you’ve experienced before.

I should say also that this is something I discovered on my own during a period of celibacy that included no masturbation, so it is very possible that you have to have quite a bit of “energy” stored up to do the hands-free masturbation thing to the point I described. This might be why it’s so hard to explain—it’s very subjective, and I’ve never seen this stuff written about before. It was however a big breakthrough/discovery for me, and I do think it’s useful if not essential information, so I hope I’ve been successful in communicating it.

EDIT: A couple more points to avoid confusion: the real objective here is NOT to be able to do hands-free masturbation. I only mentioned it in passing to give a sense of how powerful and real this kind of internal stimulation/arousal can be. When I was discovering this technique and teaching it to myself many years ago, I did ejaculate a couple of times just to see if it was possible (and again, this was during a period of no standard masturbation with long periods of semen retention, so I was already at a high base level of arousal.) I also did several internal orgasms by moving the energy into the penis and getting right to the PONR before pulling it back up and in through the tailbone. More often though, I would “pull” the energy up and spread it long before the PONR, often not even focusing the energy on my penis at all. With “stirring and swirling” you can generate a high level of arousal without even allowing an erection.

The big “secret” involved here is that energy and arousal can be generated, cultivated, and moved around purely internally.


Last edited by cheeva : 09-16-2008 at .
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