In dire need of help. need to last longer.
About 2 months ago, I started looking up stuff on kegels and what not. I tried the kegels and I noticed a stronger a erection the following day. However, the next time my girlfriend and I got together I couldn’t last for more than a minute maybe. We were going to again, but it takes me too long to re-cupe (I need porn or something at that point, I’ll be erect, but not hard enough for penetration). We tried the next night and the same thing happened, it was horrible. This happened maybe 2 more weeks afterwards, where there would be 2 consecutive nights like this during the week. It always felt like I had to urinate while we were doing anything and it made me go prematurely every time, even when I would try to pee beforehand.
My girlfriend has a really low sex drive and she always says how she doesn’t care about sex and she can go with out it. So, we would never have sex that often anyways, maybe once every 2 weeks. I know that may sound crazy to most people, especially guys. We are both in our early 20s, skinny, and very attractive (please don’t take that as me being arrogant?! I don’t usually say that, but I’m trying to be honest. Members of the opposite sex go for us all the time.). She is my first girlfriend and first sexual partner as well. We’ve been together for over 6 months now and things have gotten worse in the past few because of my premature sex problem. Before, she would say how it doesn’t matter and that just having sex with me was good, just because it was with me. Now, whenever we have an argument, the idea of me not lasting long is always brought up. Apparently, now, she does have a problem with sex..
She’s said how her past boyfriends would go really fast and it was horrible and they would eventually just stop having sex altogether. She insists that it’ll end up like it was with her other boyfriends no matter what and never get better. When we first started dating, she would say how amazing I was in bed. Back then I didn’t know anything because I was just starting, but things have gotten really bad. I’m not sure if it’s due to the stress of hardly ever having a chance to do and not wanting to fuck it up, or if it’s now just the stress of knowing that she’ll be really bothered by it? It could be a physical problem of some sort? (Maybe caused by an infection of sort) I’m afraid that it could be from the kegels? I’ve read before, that guys who have tried kegels, would have an even worse time controlling their ejaculation..
I’ve been Edging recently and Jelqing some, but I don’t think I’m doing it right or strict enough to make a difference. The techniques that have worked so far have been: using pressure points near the head and base of the shaft to kill some sensitivity, holding down on the nerve or vein in the choad to kill some sensitivity and forcing out pelvic muscles (reverse kegel?) whenever the muscle that ques the PONR involuntarily flexes. I wish I could differentiate between flexing the different pelvic muscles, but I always end up flexing them all to a degree.
The night before last, I lasted for a good half hour and I thought I had a breakthrough by pressing deep in the choad (or the vein between the balls and anus). The sensitivity would be killed easily with this technique and my hand hurt afterwards from pressing so hard. I eventually had a dry ejaculation or possibly a retrograde, because I still felt a weird buzzing sensation down there where I was pressing ‘til the next day. Then I went again the next day and lasted a half hour as well, easily. None of the pressure point techniques would work for some reason, but I seemed to have lost a lot of sensitivity and gained a lot of control over my level of arousal. I felt more confident in using these techniques even though they didn’t work this time, but maybe I could figure them out and pinpoint where and for how long they needed to be held? Today I tried to go and only lasted for not even 10 min, while edging. This is due, possibly, to: resting a day, drinking a lot of fluids (having the urge to pee all day) or doing kegels earlier in the day?
Please help me out anyone.. I don’t want to lose my first girlfriend just because I can’t please her anymore. I know that she would leave me mainly for other reasons and not just this, but I’ve already lost a lot of attraction from her because of this. I need to show her that I can make her happy in every way possible and that things can get better. It’ll kill me knowing that she left me and she’s out there getting it good from some other guy who took the time to take care of his problems (maybe he never had any though).
Thank you all.
Last edited by chapstick : 09-23-2009 at .