Retarded ejaculation

I have this problem too. Can never cum from vaginal intercourse or blow jobs, only can with my own hand. I put it down to not getting used to cumming from sex in my teen years.

Interesting read about the histamine though.

Thanks for your brilliant contributions Twatteaser, I have been offline for several weeks; I do not notice anyting at 100mg but around 200mg I do start to feel some flushing; however I must still do more testing and will get back to you with the results. Thanks for your help.

No problemo, sir. Keep an eye on things on your end and tell us how it works out. I did find out some more info to look over too.

twatteaser - Can’t last long in Bed….

Excellent question. I assume the darker your skin color, the more you would have to rely on the FEELING of the flush, than the color, though that might show at a much more subtle redness, if at all. Perhaps an increased itchiness would be the determining factor?

The second reaction of niacin flush is the annoying, and sometimes painful itch that comes along with it. This itch is actually healthy! The reason you are experiencing this itch is because the niacin has allowed more blood to reach your cells to remove toxins from them. As toxins are carried away and your cell becomes healthier, it is finally able to "call" your body for help! Your body responds by sending what is called a histamine to the cell. Histamines cause you to itch, but they also allow your body to send more water, blood, and nutrients to the area that called them.
http://www.mens -total-fitness. … acin-flush.html

It is not uncommon for your heart to race, your skin to get red like a sunburn, your body temperature to increase, and you may even break a sweat while you feel an adrenaline rush.
http://www.jane thull.com/askdr … icle.php?id=131

The symptom scores for flushing, itching, tingling, and warmth were all significantly reduced by both aspirin regimens.

This is characterized by a red and itchy face and neck that lasts a few minutes.

I smile you are damn right about one thing that itch /flushing sensation or both are bloody annoying and near enough painful at times. I am of a darker shade and thus have to rely on feeling things work. I get it around my neck area and where my bicep begins. However I have been testing myself for a few weeks and I only respond to 150mg or at 200 mg and above. At a dose of 50mg its like nothing has happened at all.

I had a blow job the other day however at times I can feel overwhelming sensation and at other times I feel near enough nothing;; its an interesting situation but I have met a lady who is trying to help me out too and to be honest there has been a time where I have come very close to reaching climax and slowly we are getting there. I have been cheating because every time I go see her I make sure that I have taken at least 100mg of Niacin.

One thing I noted today is that I was rather sweating quite a bit now I know it was quite a warm evening but I generally tend not to sweat very much so that has definitely been an interesting occurrence and I attribute that to the increased Niacin.

I smile you are damn right about one thing that itch /flushing sensation or both are bloody annoying and near enough painful at times. I am of a darker shade and thus have to rely on feeling things work. I get it around my rneck area and where my bicep begins. However I have been testing myself for a few weeks and I only respond to 150mg or at 200 mg and above. At a dose of 50mg its like nothing has happened at all.

I had a blow job the other day however at times I can feel overwhelming sensation and at other times I feel near enough nothing;; its an interesting situation but I have met a lady who is trying to help me out too and to be honest there has been a time where I have come very close to reaching climax and slowly we are getting there. I have been cheating because every time I go see her I make sure that I have taken at least 100mg of Niacin.

One thing I noted today is that I was rather sweating quite a bit now I know it was quite a warm evening but I generally tend not to sweat very much so that has definitely been an interesting occurrence and I attribute that to the increased Niacin.

I have the same “problem” and yes, I do also consider it a problem, because it has lowered my confidence aswell. I have no problems coming during oral and hand jobs, but vaginal intercourse is very difficult for me. I can fuck a girl like a wild maniac on speed for as long as I want (or don’t want, until I can hardly breath and have no sweat left in my body) and of course I want to be able to cum when I fuck. Coming on my own is no problem.

The girl is usually happy afterwards, but am I?

It feels so good to have this place, to talk about one’s insecurities without being ridiculed (AND studying/practicing the knowledge of getting a (much!) bigger dick). I have been thinking about this for quite a long time now, and I have been looking for a few solutions that might work. Let the sensitivitation begin :) .

Krowax,I smile you are right there many men like us with a common challenge in varying degrees. I came once or twice during intercourse some two years ago. However it took a long time I have not been able to pull it off but it was one of the most intense sexual experiences I have ever had. I have recently met a lady and if there is anyone in this world who is capable of getting me off its going to be her…there have been a couple of times when things have come rather close. The fact that she is very sexually charged as I am has intensified things for us.

Krowax we are going to keep this thread going until we find a solution to our challenges. There is an answer to our challenge we just have to figure our way around it which will mean a lot of experiementing and seeing where potential answers rest. I am going to continue learning more of Niacin and see how to tweak and cycle things and see how things play off.

Hello all, I wanted to update everyone on the progress that I have made in the RE department of my life. There have been a number of steps that I think have helped me along the way and quite a few more that could further help me.

First I noticed that the more I was into the PE thing the more insecure I seemed to be, for example for about two months I had a hard time keeping a good erection which led to some major let downs and zero chances of getting off. This was at the height of my PE career.

Second thing that I noticed it that I was putting a lot of pressure on myself. In the previous post and similarly in an earlier post of my own, I talk about being with a girl that I was convinced I would get off with. Well guess what? nothing happened, she stopped hanging out with me, I sucked at life and was depressed. None of which is conducive to getting off.

Chapter 2:
After about a 2 month deacon break where I was not as into PE, things sort of began to change. I started hanging out with a girl that I used to sleep with a while ago and it was the same old song and dance, but then things began to change. I started a new routine in which I would edge 1 or 2 times a day mon-fri, knowing we would be together on the weekend. At night I still couldn’t get off, even while doing some crazy stuff straight out of a porno, but the morning was a different story.

The Morning:
Being somewhat sober, sober enough to feel things but out of it enough not to care about anything, we went for round two. This time things were different, I could feel more, the sun was out so I could see more, and I wasn’t drunk so I could concentrate better. Guess what happened, I got off! And in a reasonable amount of time, maybe 10min or so. Being the originator of this post I want to share what I have learned about our unique condition.

The Bottom Line:
Conditioning: You may have conditioned yourself to orgasm to specific sensations through different masturbation techniques. Too hard, too often, too fast or just way too different. So switch to only masturbating two days a week with a soft grip.

Anxiety: Worrying about being an adequate lover, having a small penis (i.e. being a member here), being better then her former partners or a disbelief that you can actually come. Don’t have expectations, or insecurities.

Self sabotage: This was the one that ended up being my final demon. I would always get close to orgasm, but then it would go away. Or sex would feel good but when it started to feel good I would escalate. What you need to do is when you find a spot and rhythm you like, stick with it! Don’t freak out and think “oh my god I’m almost there”, just keep the same pace and take your time. The mistake I made was getting close then pounding away as fast as I could trying to get off, but that’s not how it works. Start slow, escalate, when you get close stay the course and slowly turn up the speed.

Over all I think there are five steps:
1. Get over your penis, its fine the way it is! (obsessing about size, will never help you get off)
2. Get over yourself, you’re fine the way you are! (being insecure not only makes you less attractive but less likely to get off)
3. Have discipline; after years of conditioning saying you can’t cum from sex, you need to dedicate yourself to not whacking off and start edging without cumming. This is so that you can get off through sex which will in the end reprogram your mind. (this step is important once you know you can get off through sex. You need to reprogram yourself so that sex and ejaculation is easy. i.e. don’t whack off ten times a week and expect it too happen again)
4. Don’t self sabotage. I think most people with this problem like sex and think it feels good, but just have the mental block saying they can’t do it. Don’t try too hard, don’t over think it, take your time and if something feels good don’t escalate it, keep doing it. (similar to the anxiety section, don’t get over hyped, be confident stick with it, don’t over think it. Sex is fun!)
5. Stick with the program. If you are unsure of yourself, you won’t get off. If you over think it, you wont get off. Be patient and work on it everyday. If you are obsessed with PE and your wiener, take a break you’re not helping yourself.

PE should be something you do to better yourself, not something you do out of insecurity. If you don’t tackle your insecurity you’ll never be happy, even with an elephant dick.

Nice post. Self acceptance has to come before PE in my opinion. If not, continual focus on something you deem as a problem will only exacerbate insecurities.

I put my difficulty cumming down to the habit of masturbation, but primarily down to anxiety. Always worrying about how the girl feels, about how I feel, about how long I have been doing something, is she bored, is she enjoying it, will my dick stay hard …. coupled with consciously trying to appear relaxed and really enjoying myself .. it’s no wonder I have trouble… there’s no room left in my head to just sit back and enjoy the experience.

Hey smooth op when you got off did you where a condom?

The first few times yes and I think that is what did it at first. There was extra friction from her drying out and the condom rubbing around. Lately however I have been with another girl and we don’t use condoms (she’s on the pill and we’ve both been tested) and I can come with her pretty consistently. If I’m sober and have a full load it’s not really a problem anymore, unless there is some sort of extra stress for some reason. It’s really been nice overcuming this obstacle in my life and hopefully others will meet the same success.

Just thought I would try and get this thread back up and running, so that some other folks with similar issues can benefit from my progress. To make a long story short so you don’t have to read the previous five pages; I had sex with 20 women without ever getting off…. the 21st girl I finally did it but I was only batting about .100. Then I met a girl who I was really comfortable with and bada bing bada boom I was up to 50% and things were great…. That is until she left me for another dude, shitty to say the least, but the sex wasn’t the problem I was.

Anyways, after that I went on a little bender and fucked a few other girls and couldn’t get off. Back to square one right? Thankfully no. I started hooking up with a girl on a pretty consistent basis and was back to the 50% mark and feeling much better about everything. But she got serious with another dude too, so that was no longer an option.

Then came the real breakthrough! Since the other girl was out of the equation I started to concentrate my energy on pretty much just one girl. Now I’m proud to say that we are together and I’m batting 100%! I actually really like sex now, there is almost no anxiety about performance and I am now able to go three or four times in one day!

Anyways, what I have learned is that getting off is not just something that happens for everyone like you would think. As terrible as it sounds in a lot of ways, for some guys getting off is like getting off for girls. They don’t think it will every happen through sex and feel like something is wrong with them, but once they figure it out…. Its on!

I think everything I have written before is still applicable. If you have a problem with retarded ejaculation then you probably shouldn’t look at porn or whack off more than once a week. You also should be working on feeling good about yourself as a person, but I think the most important thing is to find a girl you feel comfortable with and not to put pressure on yourself. Let it happen naturally, don’t stress yourself out and a lot of foreplay i.e. her giving your unit some attention prior to sex helps more than you could imagine.

Good luck! and if anyone has any success stories like mine, or advice please feel free to post them.

Nice posts smoothoperator. I think the 5 point list is spot on.

I have a milder case of retarded ejaculation (I can cum by oral or manual stimulation most of the time, but extremely rarely by vaginal intercourse). I didn’t see this as a problem until lately. I can get an erection extremely easy and can maintain it for hours (the longest time we made love in one go was 3 hours and we stopped because we were exhausted). I’ve been with my current girlfriend for about a year and a half, it doesn’t bother her and she’s very understanding and helpful.

At first it was actually a good thing, we actually relied on it as a contraception method (we stopped using condoms after the first 2-3 months). Last autumn she started taking contraception pills and she wanted me to cum inside. We tried for about a month and finally it happened on New Year Eve (she got me close to the point of no return by hand and then it was a bit easier). It happened a few times (less then 10) in the first 6 months this year (we do it about 3-5 times a week). It’s been getting a lot better the last 2 months (about 20% of the time). We talked about it a lot this past 2 weeks, because our schedule is getting busier and we decided to try to keep it under an hour, foreplay included (that means 40 minutes tops for actual sex).

My additional tips would be:
* When ready, find a position that suits you, not her (she had hers already :D ). One in which you are relaxed and can focus on your pleasure. In my case it’s sitting on my back, legs straight, girl on top, deep thrusting (I came only 3 times in another position).
* Points 1 and 2 from smoothoperators post are still valid, but a bigger penis will help (it will fill her better and the added friction will feel better).

A bigger measure of sensation would help. Are there any intact guys in this thread complaining of retarded ejaculation or anorgasmia?

Cut guys can wear the skin the have left forward over the glans - like a foreskin - to improve glans and mucosal supplness for maximum sensation.

-Ron