Guilty Spark's Atypical Log

Yeah, I might just do that. A week off to get my mind off things sounds better than a week with potentially mixed failed and successful sessions. That would only add to my discouragement. I’m not quite at that point yet though. Going to try for a fresh start on Monday, and if at any point next week I have a failed session again, then I will take the week after that off. I wouldn’t say I train a lot. Only four days a week, and 300 jelqs. No more. I know there are members here who do more than that. My sessions ARE pretty intense though.

This is going to be a long post. I have much to say.

Another update. I am still clueless as to what is going on, but tonight at least, after the orgasm, I was still feeling unexplainably horny a few hours later, so I decided like last Friday to take advantage of it and try again. Like before, I had trouble getting hard, but at least this time I got hard enough for jelqing. I nearly came several times, in spite of my previous orgasm, but I was careful and managed to avoid doing so.

At first my thinking was that I would take what I could get. Anything was better than nothing was how I approached it. To my surprise, I managed to reach 100 jelqs, and the more I jelqed, the more my EQ improved. I thought that if I could make it to 154 jelqs tonight to add to the 146 I did last night, that would be 300 jelqs between the two days. Well when I made it to 150, I decided to keep going until at least 200. I thought I would stop there because the strokes were making my arms tired (usually this does not happen, so something physically is definitely going on). To my further surprise, the arm fatigue was more tolerable than I thought it would be, and I made it all the way to 300 jelqs.

There is, I believe, a silver lining to all of this, as I have made some potentially helpful observations. What I’ve been doing was taking a shower and immediately going to PE. This is because washing away all of the sweat and oils of the day makes for a much firmer and tighter grip, allowing for great stretching.

There are three problems here however. One relates to the effect of the shower itself, and the other two relate to the spacing of the exercises. All are related.

1. Washing away the sweat and oils means a great grip yes, but it also means that when I do stretching and go right into jelqing, it doesn’t matter how much lube I use. It is more difficult to glide the okay grip up the shaft, because beneath the lube, there is still a surface that is not as slippery. It’s like putting oil on concrete.

2. Going right into jelqing from stretching means my penis is somewhat traumatized from the stretching, and the process of getting hard doesn’t feel as good, nor is it as effective as it should be.

3. The warmup seems to only be really effective for the stretching portion. Over the course of the stretches, my penis cools over time.

The following is what I have observed over the course of my failed sessions.

1. When I jelq some hours after stretching, it seems that is enough time for some of the natural skin oils to return. On the days I have failed, going back and trying again later meant that the okay grip slid much more smoothly up the shaft, making for less effort to do the jelqs, and a smoother workout.

2. Going straight from warming up into jelqing seems to be more effective because for the jelq session, the benefits of the heat are there.

In order to have more effective PE sessions, I will be splitting up my workout. Soon after I come home from work, I will shower and do the stretching portion. Then I will make some dinner and relax for a few hours. Then at the usual time, I will do the jelq portion. Previously I had thought that stretching before jelqing probably had some benefits, but I think the benefit of having a warmup for stretching and jelqing each, as well as the smoother glide for the jelqing portion of the workout will have greater benefits in the long run.

For the moment, I have basically gotten in all of my normal workouts for the week, in spite of the problems with the exception of Monday. Hoping that when I start PE again on Monday of this coming week I will not have anymore problems. Time will tell.

My penis is looking very big lately, and in spite of my recent troubles, I am absolutely committed to pushing onward. Seeing how it is changing makes me VERY excited!

When I get jealous of the fact that some men have legitimate 9 inch cocks, I try to remember that while it may look impressive, 9 inches is in most cases impractical for sex. I will be very happy if I ever reach 7 x 6, and will likely stop PE at that time since I would prefer to do something else with my time in the evenings. 7 x 6 ought to be large enough to look and feel impressive, but not be so large that sex is an issue.

Tonight begins week number two of my fourth month back at PE, and I am hoping very much that this week I will not have anymore failed sessions. This is also the first night that I will be doing my modified routine. Once again, my belief is that because taking a shower strips the natural oils and sweat from the penis and hands, it makes jelqing harder if it is done shortly after showering. No matter how much lube I use, the grip always seems to be harder to slide up the shaft. I have already done my stretches after showering with a warm up at the beginning, and a warm down after. Will be moving on to my jelqs in a few hours once I have had a chance to relax a little bit and have some food. Will give an update on how jelqs are affected, if at all.

Regarding the failed sessions; I honestly think there’s more a chance of me mentally sabotaging myself than a jelq session actually failing. I’m trying not to think about it too much.

I use Jergens ultra healing lotion for jelqing and pumping. Not too slick, but doesn’t stick or chatter, and can be refreshed with a little bit of water just like water-based lube. And it washes off easily, leaving soft skin and a pleasant smell. Great seal for pumping, too

Very nice. It’s always good to find a lube that works well. I use Albolene myself. Saw it recommended on this site, and I’ve never used anything else since then.

I really didn’t want to do this, but I’m going to take a week off from PE. Tonight I got to 53 jelqs before I could no longer hold off orgasm. I really don’t know what is going on. Could it be the L-Arginine finally taking effect? More blood flow means more sensitivity right? And my penis has been unusually sensitive lately. So sensitive that orgasm while jelqing is apparently unavoidable. Also, there seems to be fewer days now between the time I orgasm, and the time I feel like I have to do it again. Tonight it felt like I hadn’t orgasmed in a week, even though the last time had been on Saturday. I hate to take any time off. Always, I want to be pushing forward toward that bigger dick, but I think maybe my dick needs a reset. After all, it’s been more or less 3 months of non-stop exercise. Maybe it just needs a break.

There’s also the concern that this could be linked to an underlying health issue. As I have said, I have felt really off lately. A feeling of weakness in the arms and legs has been somewhat common, as well as easily losing circulation in my right arm. Who knows? I’ve experienced these things before. I may try PE one last time tomorrow before determining once and for all if a break is needed. This has been an off day for me. Have felt sensitive to temperature all day, and was feeling none too great before I attempted PE. Time for sleep.

In my last entry, I said I might try again before deciding if I’d be taking a week off. I really should have said will, not might. I can’t help it. PE has become an integral part of my everyday life. I have to keep trying until I’m 100% certain that there is no other option. It’s not like I’m injured or anything. If I’m suffering from anything at all, it’s the exercise fatigue that every man who does PE experiences.

I’m really beginning to think that the reason for my difficulties is the L-Arginine. Better blood flow means greater sensitivity right? And damn, its been sensitive lately. I think I’ll just need to orgasm more frequently. Had one yesterday. Let’s see how today’s attempt goes.

Got home from work, did the obligatory snuggle with the cat who always jumps on top of me the moment I sit down, then hopped in the shower. Did my stretches after the shower. I decided to test the waters so to speak and reached for the lube. Best I could manage was semi hard, which I expected. I had only just gotten home about an hour ago, and I was hungry. It is very hard for me to focus on being horny when I am hungry. Good news is that it felt good, but it didn’t feel like I was on a runaway train toward the cliff of orgasm. I’m feeling pretty normal tonight. Tired, but normal. Not like last night when I felt totally off for whatever reason. I have high hopes for tonight. For now it is time to have some food and try not to psych myself out over this.

Well, I guess I’ll see if I even have it in me to try tonight. My teeth are in absolutely horrible shape, and a tooth is bothering me tonight. It’s not severe, but I feel that dull ache in my tooth, jaw, neck, and head. Took an Aleve a little over 30 minutes ago. Anyone who has experienced tooth pain knows that it pretty much crowds out everything else. I might try PE later than my usual time in order to give the Aleve time to take effect. And hopefully the Aleve does not negatively affect my EQ. Apparently it can do that for some men.

Popped a second Aleve. Going to wait another half hour. Pain is greatly reduced, but still enough to be distracting.

First things first, tonight’s session was successful. It was almost TOO good. Very paradoxical. Let me explain.

I had a really hard time getting hard enough for jelqing. It wasn’t until I felt like I was getting close to orgasm that I got hard enough for some jelqs. For the first 30-40 jelqs or so, it felt like I was on a razor’s edge. One wrong move and it would all be over, and I was far softer than I like to be for jelqing at first. Then as my penis had more and more blood forced into it, and the intensity of the jelqs reduced the sensitivity somewhat, I found I was able to remain hard. This is where things get nuts. This may be the best EQ I’ve had for a session EVER, in spite of my initial difficulties. More and more I think the increased sensitivity, and the apparently much improved EQ is a result of the L-Arginine. I’m thinking my failed sessions were coincidental, and they just happened to coincide with a few days where I was feeling crappy. I think it very possible that much like with sex, my brain played a role in tonight’s difficulties getting hard.

Even though tonight was successful, this is honestly very impractical. With time I could probably learn how to deal with this new behavior from my body, but it’s probably going to mean a lot of failed sessions first. I just need to be super careful when I do PE that I don’t trigger orgasm.

Since last night was essentially a failure with only 53 jelqs, I am beginning week two of month four tonight, and my new exercise days will be Tue Wed Fri Sat, until or unless I need to restart again due to another failed session. Looking forward to seeing how things go.

“A fisherman with a toothache stood up in his rowboat to make a cast. He overbalanced and fell over the side. Due to his wearing loose shorts, his testicles were caught in the oarlock and he was suspended upside-down in the water by his balls. He nearly drowned before he was hauled back out of the water.

While he was spitting up gobs of lake water, a bystander commented that nearly drowning must have been a horrible experience. The fisherman considered a moment, then said, ‘It wasn’t that bad. For a few minutes there, my tooth didn’t bother me at all.’”

This is funny because it sounds plausible.