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The wife thinks PE is having a negative affect on our sex lives

Originally Posted by Titleist
Remember foreplay starts with the dishes, vacuuming and keeping the house clean. High foreplay can be seen with making sure you help with the kids.

When you’re providing oral sex, make sure you reacquaint yourselves with her clitoris. She may notice the loss of vagina elasticity more than you do. If that’s the case, let her own that part. Women never want to be told they’re not snug.

It may be time to revisit the PE conversation. Reassure her you are doing itnto keep healthy and be the best lover for her you can be. Ask her questions and really listen to her responses.


Great advice. I could definitely help more around the house and with the kids (I do the dishes more than her lol).

As far as her saying her clit is higher now and I can’t find it, I find that really hard to believe. We have been together almost 15 years with minimal issues in the bedroom. She had always orgasmed first and I could get her there anyway I or she wanted. I am torn on whether its the emotional side or the pill that has caused her lack of sensitivity. I have taken weeks and months off from PE and nothing changed.

I’ll work on showing her more love and attention before I accuse her of cheating.


Starting date 5/14/2015

Staring size: NBPEL 8.0 BPEL 8.75 Mseg 4.9 BEG 5.25

Currently 5/17/2016 NBPEL 8.3 MSEG 5.25 BEG 5.7

Originally Posted by SoLong
Great advice. I could definitely help more around the house and with the kids (I do the dishes more than her lol).

As far as her saying her clit is higher now and I can’t find it, I find that really hard to believe. We have been together almost 15 years with minimal issues in the bedroom. She had always orgasmed first and I could get her there anyway I or she wanted. I am torn on whether its the emotional side or the pill that has caused her lack of sensitivity. I have taken weeks and months off from PE and nothing changed.

I’ll work on showing her more love and attention before I accuse her of cheating.


Unless you have a gut feeling or proof don’t accuse her of cheating bro. My wife has had issues with the pill too. We have six kids and a full schedule so life does get in the way too. One thing I’ve learned is you catch more flies with honey. We’ve also been together 15 years and I’m the only man that’s been inside her. She’s generally honest with me about everything but she’s also very shy about opening up about her sexual desires. So I have to kind of guess and go with what I know has worked in the past. And what I know has worked in the past is love, attention, listening and affection. It beats anything else I can do in bed. Also I noticed when she gets exercise she enjoy sex a lot more.

Originally Posted by BiggusDikkus
Not to discount the serious nature of your issue, but how do you have time to work on penis enlargement with three kids?

Ours are 8, 5, and 15 months, and my wife and I both work full time. Some days we don’t even hug, let alone have sex.

My wife has had minor body issues since our first child. Either she puts up a good front, or knows that I love her no matter what, which I do, and I tell her every day. Whatever body image thoughts she had doesn’t seem to bother her outwardly as much anymore. Truthfully, her stomach is slightly soft, but it’s not horrifying or off-putting at all. I love her and she knows it. I have “Dad-bod” and she has never said anything to me about being soft around the middle, or been mad at me if I occasionally lose erections during sex, etc. What it sounds like with your wife is that maybe she’s self-conscious about her elasticity, and hasn’t figured out the right way to convey it to you, or maybe even ask your out right, honest opinion. As men we have to be careful with how we answer questions LOL, but even though sometimes the truth can hurt, it’s better to put it out there than to go on not being honest.

If there is concern that she feels unloved, or that enough time is not devoted to her, there’s really easy ways to fix that: first, do things before she asks you to do them. Second, visible cleaning or when she comes home she can see that the floors have been mopped or vacuumed, or the kids are already bathed and in their pajamas, that goes along way. My wife has even told me in the past, even just seeing me interacting with the kids is a huge turn-on for her, witnessing me being an amazing Dad.

Do the small things. If she’s in the shower, put her towel in the dryer and hand it to her nice and warm as soon as she gets out. She will take notice of that. If she likes tea or coffee or whatever, fix her some and bring it to her unannounced. Even if she’s not thirsty, she’ll notice that you’re paying attention to her.

My wife is especially impressed when she comes home from her hour and a half commute and notices that the kids have eaten, homework is done, and cleaning is either in progress or has already taken place. That’s when she tells our oldest kids to watch our youngest for twenty minutes, so “Mommy and Daddy can talk while Mommy showers,” and then my wife will thank me for making things less stressful when she gets home via deep throat blowie, aka Shower Head.

Accomplishing all these tasks isn’t easy, but for the health of relationships and marriages, in the end it’s absolutely worth it.
Nobody wants to mop or fold towels or clean toilets, but these things have to be done. If you do them instead of your wife, she’ll notice and appreciate it. Take the kids out for ice cream and then run some errands for an hour or two, giving your wife some peace and quiet. When you come back and she’s refreshed, guess who reaps rewards: you :-)

Hopefully this can give you some ideas, or at least remind you of things that you know make your wife happy. I’m not suggesting you need to be the resident houseboy, but picking up here in there gets you mileage. Best of luck!


Thank you for your advice. She says that I am an amazing dad but I could help pick up more often, help the kids with homework, and etc.

I am going to try all of these things to make her life easier and relieve some stress off of her and see if that helps our marriage. I think this could all be something in her head instead of the physical side. I know the birth control pill doesn’t help and she would be very happy if I got the vasectomy.

On a side note what are your thoughts on vasectomies? Could they lead to prostate cancer. Is it more the norm for the wife to get her tubes tide?

I may be asking the wrong person but I figured it doesnt hurt to ask.

Thanks

P.S. I usually dont have much time for PE thats why I have been on and off. I get plenty of rest. She doesn’t realize that I don’t PE often. I go in spurts as time allows.


Starting date 5/14/2015

Staring size: NBPEL 8.0 BPEL 8.75 Mseg 4.9 BEG 5.25

Currently 5/17/2016 NBPEL 8.3 MSEG 5.25 BEG 5.7


Last edited by SoLong : 04-03-2017 at .

Originally Posted by SoLong
I know the birth control pill doesn’t help and she would be very happy if I got the vasectomy.

On a side note what are your thoughts on vasectomies? Could they lead to prostate cancer. Is it more the norm for the wife to get her tubes tide?

I may be asking the wrong person but I figured it doesnt hurt to ask.

Thanks


What a coincidence, after viewing your thread I realize that your were the perfect man to ask about a vasectomy.


Starting date 5/14/2015

Staring size: NBPEL 8.0 BPEL 8.75 Mseg 4.9 BEG 5.25

Currently 5/17/2016 NBPEL 8.3 MSEG 5.25 BEG 5.7

I had a vasectomy back in 2011 and had similar concerns about cancer. After looking around I found that the hype about increased cancer rates in vasectomized men came from ONE study, and the results were inconclusive upon further review. Summary here, can find more articles saying the same thing.

http://www.harvardprostateknowledge…ate-cancer-risk

Subsequent studies have found NO correlation between the two.

On a personal note, I am very happy I got mine. My wife was so appreciative not to have undergone major surgery, and I NEVER have to use condoms again.

That’s right. Bareback riding every time, no pulling out, no worrying afterwards.


Starting 5.8 BPEL, 5 EG 1-17-17

Current 6.6 BPEL, 5.2 E.G. 4-17-17

PE Works!

Originally Posted by Zeek1375
I had a vasectomy back in 2011 and had similar concerns about cancer. After looking around I found that the hype about increased cancer rates in vasectomized men came from ONE study, and the results were inconclusive upon further review. Summary here, can find more articles saying the same thing.

http://www.harvardprostateknowledge…ate-cancer-risk

Subsequent studies have found NO correlation between the two.

On a personal note, I am very happy I got mine. My wife was so appreciative not to have undergone major surgery, and I NEVER have to use condoms again.

That’s right. Bareback riding every time, no pulling out, no worrying afterwards.

Thanks so much


Starting date 5/14/2015

Staring size: NBPEL 8.0 BPEL 8.75 Mseg 4.9 BEG 5.25

Currently 5/17/2016 NBPEL 8.3 MSEG 5.25 BEG 5.7

Honestly, guys I thank you all. I got more feedback and advice from Thunders than I could find in hours searching google.


Starting date 5/14/2015

Staring size: NBPEL 8.0 BPEL 8.75 Mseg 4.9 BEG 5.25

Currently 5/17/2016 NBPEL 8.3 MSEG 5.25 BEG 5.7

The pill really does mess with some women in a big way.


Starting Stats - Feb 2010 - 5.5 NBPEL x 5.6 EG

Current Stats - Oct 2014 - 6.2 NBPEL x 6.1 EG

Goal - 7 x 6 (with hopefully a large flaccid hang)

Get a vasectomy, it only hurt for a few days and she will love you for doing it. I did it twenty years ago and am glad I did it.


Start April 2014 BPEL 6" EG 5"

Originally Posted by Latexman88

Get a vasectomy, it only hurt for a few days and she will love you for doing it. I did it twenty years ago and am glad I did it.

A friend is trying to convince me to do it but he said you dont want to get an erection for 6 weeks because it is painful. So no sex for sex weeks? He had his done 15 years ago so hopefully its not 6 weeks of no sex these days..lol.


Starting date 5/14/2015

Staring size: NBPEL 8.0 BPEL 8.75 Mseg 4.9 BEG 5.25

Currently 5/17/2016 NBPEL 8.3 MSEG 5.25 BEG 5.7

Well, if she is on the pill, forget everything I wrote before.

That is crucial inofrmation.

The pill fucks some women pretty bad.


BPEL 7 EG 5.5 NBPEL 6.5 Flaccid length 4.5. Started Jan 2015 at bpel 6.5 nbpel 6.0 and eg 5.2 flaccid length was 3.5

I have reached my goal. At least for now.

Originally Posted by SoLong
Thank you for your advice. She says that I am an amazing dad but I could help pick up more often, help the kids with homework, and etc.

I am going to try all of these things to make her life easier and relieve some stress off of her and see if that helps our marriage. I think this could all be something in her head instead of the physical side. I know the birth control pill doesn’t help and she would be very happy if I got the vasectomy.

On a side note what are your thoughts on vasectomies? Could they lead to prostate cancer. Is it more the norm for the wife to get her tubes tide?

I may be asking the wrong person but I figured it doesn’t hurt to ask.

Thanks

P.S. I usually don’t have much time for PE that’s why I have been on and off. I get plenty of rest. She doesn’t realize that I don’t PE often. I go in spurts as time allows.

I’m glad your wife recognizes that you’re a great dad. It’s already a good start to get things back on track with her.

I had a vasectomy in February, 2016. Mine didn’t take—-turns out I have secondary tubing that still let little swimmers in. Although my urologist says the likelihood of getting my wife pregnant again is extremely low, we’re not taking any chances.

I have two options: he can go back in and search for the other tubing, or my wife can have her tubes tied. Her thinking is that since I already went through the vasectomy, she’ll get her tubes tied. Frankly, I don’t want him digging around in my scrotum and possibly clipping the wrong things. My wife agrees.

With the meds you take prior to the procedure, you don’t really feel much, at all. You get driven home and then you keep ice packs on your balls for a day or two. I didn’t need Vicodin post surgery, Advil did just fine.

Originally Posted by SoLong
A friend is trying to convince me to do it but he said you don’t want to get an erection for 6 weeks because it is painful. So no sex for sex weeks? He had his done 15 years ago so hopefully its not 6 weeks of no sex these days.lol.

Nah. I was getting off after 5 days or so. Albeit, I was getting off with black and blue balls. Took about 3 weeks for all bruising and discomfort to go away.

Never handed a jar of splooge to a strange woman until then!! (Make sure to do the postop follow up to insure you are sterile if you decide to do this.)


Starting 5.8 BPEL, 5 EG 1-17-17

Current 6.6 BPEL, 5.2 E.G. 4-17-17

PE Works!

Originally Posted by SoLong
A friend is trying to convince me to do it but he said you don’t want to get an erection for 6 weeks because it is painful. So no sex for sex weeks? He had his done 15 years ago so hopefully its not 6 weeks of no sex these days.lol.

My Urologist said no sex for a week afterward, mainly because of risk if something happening to the incision. Never had any pain associated with erections after surgery. Even though it’s separate hardware, I was happy the first time I got erect after the procedure. “Oh, thank God it still works” hahaha.

Even my most worry prone friend underwent a vasectomy. There’s nothing to worry about. A lot of it is just buildup in your mind, simply because someone is cutting on your nut sack.

Hahaha, sorry, but I laugh my ass off every time someone says “women are complicated”, not they’re not, they’re just difficult at times and that’s it.

My guess is she’s cheating or just lost interest after knowing about your PE, thinking that if you’re not satisfied with your dick then she isn’t either.

She’s obviously just out of the blue lost interest in your dick so it’s one of the two I mentioned, I’m even willing to bet on it.

Not trying to be a dick head, it’s just my years of experience with the opposite sex that have made me learn how easy it is to read women as well, they like us, are humans with the same emotions as us, only theirs are slightly exaggerated due to the estrogen which can complicate things for no apparent reason.

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