This will be long, but I feel a great need to bare my soul to people who
might understand and are or have been in the same boat and can offer insights
I am 33 years of age, in great physical shape. My penis is 4.4”NBPL and almost
5”BPL. 4.3” Girth. For the last 13 years, I’ve not had sex. I’ve been with 3 girls,
and all 3 have had many complaints about my small size. “I can’t feel anything”.
“We need to talk, my last boyfriend was a bit larger and there were sensations, I
can’t come when I’m with you”. “Oh my god, that is so tiny!” Etc, etc, I don’t
want to recall all those bad times. The one that is burned in my mind was this
amazing girl I was in love with. She was sweet, and nice, and had all the qualities
I looked for in a woman. She made me think of marriage. 5’1”, so I thought here’s a
girl that could be satisfied with my size. It was going great, but after 4 months
she broke up with me. I asked her what the problem was, and she explained that
she just doesn’t get excited about sex with me, there’s no sensation at all and
she feels I was just something that would get in the way of a real, normal sized
man to spend her time with. I was devastated.
I decided to not have any more relationships after that. Another woman commenting
on how tiny I am and how most other men could please her could drive me into
suicidal, depressing thoughts. I recalled how it was, I remember the women not having
orgasms with me, or even enjoying penetration that much. I felt lost in a vagina,
not touching all the walls and it slipping out so easily and shallow trusts.
As time passed, I discovered my life was too bleak and lonely. At 33, I’m not finding
many reasons to get out of bed, or suceed in life, to come to my empty house. So
I started to look on ways to fix my problem. Another relationship that ends in sex
is a no-no, another comment on how small I am compared to all previous lovers would
really affect me greatly. So I started researching. I found Big Al’s site, and others,
and have done the routines outlined there and here, religiously. It sounded like people
were having sucesses, even men with normal sized 5.5 or 6 at start were getting over 1”
in gain. My spirits soared.
I dreamt of having a 5.5” penis. A within the normal range one. And I could go out
again, and able to please some women out there. It’s now been 7 months since I started my
routine, mostly Big Al’s FMOI and II. And I’m still 4.4”/4.3”. I am beginning to panic.
Life over 35 alone while being alone for more than a decade is not something I am
looking forward to. I ordered a bib starter hanger, and took a vacation from work so
I have the time and privacy to do the exercises. I need to know if I will reach 5.5 in
the next 7 months, if this site and big al’s are not just a joke to lift the spirits of
guys like me or if there’s something wrong with my penis, that it started so little so
a proportional gain of 1” will be much harder to achieve than one who started at 6”.
Since my gains have been non existant, and it will take so long to reach my 5.5 goal,
I’ve begun to really worry about some posts I’ve read here. Men with 6, 6 1/2 length
penises and 5” girth being told by their partners that more is better, and more pleasing.
Some men hitting bottom, and the cul-de-sac, giving their partners great orgasms. I fear
those feats are forever out of my reach, and even if I do gain my 5.5 length and 5 girth
goal I will never be as satisfying, even putting a great effort and a lot of time
into improving myself.
So I come to you, the PE community, to ask for advice and support. I feel I’m at the end
of my rope, and I might be seeing things distortedly because of my special situation. I need
to know if it’s possible to be happy with a 4.4, or 5” penis, and that a partner can forego
the easier orgasms with their previous partner and choose me, over others. In my limited
experience, it seems that strong feelings are attached to good sex, and after having it it
is hard for a woman to erase those experiences from her life to go and spend her time with
a less satisfying lover. I need to know if I should go out there, and suffer humiliation
because there might be a chance some women will prefer me and be truly happy with my size.
I will continue my PE routines, and will hang during my vacation. But I’m beginning to feel
truly desperate. A couple more years of my life alone will … I don’t know. I’ve bared my
soul here. From the bottom of my heart, tell me if there’s something I’ve overlooked. And
please be frank. I need real answers I feel, not more hopes. Thank you for reading this.