Thunder's Place

The big penis and mens' sexual health source, increasing penis size around the world.

Is It In Yet????

Well after having spent the better part of 2 hours reading through the countless stories here on this thread (both comedic and tragic), I’d like to share my reason for starting PE..

I haven’t heard the dreaded “Is it in yet” (pray that I never will), but there have been a several instances in my life that triggered a “big dick complex” I guess. They occur in a “cascade” fashion, with each incident bringing me closer and closer to the truth: I’ve got a small dick that needs to get bigger.

My first gf that I had back in highschool, which turned out to be very long term (2.5 years), had one bf before me, but was still a virgin. There was this one day that she was giving me head, and like HalluciNation I kinda noticed that it didn’t exactly fill her mouth like I wanted it to; that was incident #1, but it wasn’t exactly too serious of an issue for me at the time.

Incident #2 came about 15 minutes later (I came, haha), and I made the dumb mistake of asking “So it’s pretty big huh?”, to which she said “it’s about the same as my ex”. Now to this day, I still don’t know how much truth there was in that statement, but it immediately set off a flurry of insecurities. After that day, I would constantly try to “maximize” my boner length just to make sure I had every inch I could get when I was with her. I always suspected her of lying to me that day, and it still sticks in the back of my head sometimes.

The third incident that worsened whatever issues I already had happened after we fucked around in bed for a while. I just came and of course, was turtling up like a motherf*cker. She then puts her hand down there, and I was pretty pleased at first cause I interpreted this as a signal of her wanting more. I tried to get it back up again, but failed miserably. She ended up kinda fondling it/playing with my LIMP dick and out of her mouth came the words “Aww, it’s such a cute little thing”. That was basically when I decided that I WANTED, NEEDED a bigger cock. Hearing the word “little” in a sentence with reference to your dick is something that I sincerely hope few men have to encounter. Kind of related to incident #3 is the fact that the range of sexual positions I could do was pretty limited, and I wanted to explore LOTS more (I measured in at 5.5nbp, 4.5eg).

We broke up sometime during freshman year, and the 4th and final incident that finally caused me to begin PE was a one-night stand that I had in soph year. In this case, the girl just straight up told me: “You’re small”. Terrible, terrible feelings ensued; I got this empty feeling in my gut as if I had just been kicked in the balls, my heart sank in my chest and shit. From what I can remember, I googled penis enlargement that very same night.

That last incident occurred only 4 months ago, and I started PE just over 2 months ago. I’m proud to say that I’ve gained (5.8nbp, 4.75eg), though not significantly and nowhere near my goals, but gains are gains right? I’m very excited about continuing with PE. I think a good piece of information to add is the fact that I’m of Asian descent, and as such have heard alot of the flack about “asians having small penises”. A huge motivator for me is to fight against this stereotype, and PE forums have already given me lots of hope for this cause.

Also I’m not sure if this is the case with anyone else, but I think I might be addicted to it.. The only thing holding me back from PE everyday is my philosophy that “less is more”.


Start: 5.50" x 4.60"

Now: 6.70" x 4.80" (Goal: 8.00" x 6.00")

Current routine - hanging/ads, clamping and bathmate

Originally Posted by TheContinental

she said “Jewish guys are known for being big “.

One of my SQ friends holds to that theory.


Running a Massive Co-Front.

When I was 15 my dad decided it was time to move us out of the ghetto. It was only 25 minutes away so my then gf and I decided we would try and stay together. She would come visit me like once a week, usually on weekends.

One night invited my gf to a house party, She made a few friends really fast. I wanted to go home at around 10:00 p.m but she was having a great time, so I said fuck it and told her to just call me when she got home.

I woke up at around 7:00 a.m and I was looking through my missed calls and noticed that one of my friends had left me a message at around 2:30 a.m. I listened to it and my heart dropped to the floor. The message was, “dude your girlfriend was dancing with Mark all night, and I heard they left at the same time”.

I was furious, I was throwing things and crying uncontrollably. I thought she was would never do this to me.

I finally got a hold of her and she was a total bitch about it. She straight up confessed to it and told me she was sorry but she didn’t love me anymore. It was with the tone she said it in that pissed me off even more. She sounded like she didn’t care at all what I felt.. It was like I was talking to a completely different person. Of course I did the usual “don’t leave me please!” but it didn’t work. I was crushed.

The whole summer I locked myself in my room, I wouldn’t eat anything, I wouldn’t answer my friends calls. All I could think about was what was it about this guy that made her leave me flat out cold. School started again but the guy had graduated and left for college.

One of his best friends told me everything. He said that he and my ex-gf went in his car, drove a few blocks to a park and fucked for like 3 hours straight. He had heard messages that my ex left him talking about how he’s the best she’s ever had, and how impressive his dick was. They fucked all summer and apparently he broke her heart when he told her too fuck off.

When I heard about him having a big dick I had to ask around to see if it was true. Sure enough this 6 foot 3 quarterback was huge, and to make it even worse, he could pass as a supermodel.

After that I worried alot about my size. Being a tall black guy with an average dick makes it worse I think. I even asked my mom and older sister how many black guys that they had been with were large. My sis said she had never seen a big dick in person, and my mom said my dad wasn’t large either.

furrymonster- Comments from girls can really take a toll on a guy. You should of told her she was fat, even though she might not of been LOL! Actually, comments like that can make someone really depressed, even suicidal (maybe that is how you became after she said that), but it will hurt them back if they hurt you.

I haven’t been in a situation where a girl told me I was small, but my current girlfriend told me that her ex was way too big for her and sex was uncomfortable. We weren’t having a heart-to-heart conversation or anything, but we got on the topic of it for a minute. She isn’t the type of girl to lie about something like that so I have no reason to think she is lying.

Mackey - Wow. That is something else. First off, karma is a bitch and always wins, so don’t worry. The guy broke up with her so that probably hit her pretty hard. It’s really hard to believe that human beings can be so cold.

Even though someone might be in a good relationship, sometimes they just want “more”. It all depends on the person and how they are (it might be genetic or not, I’m not sure). It’s like millionaires and billionaires. How can someone who has enough money for 10 generations want more money? They can already buy what they want. Why would a guy with a 9” penis want a 10” penis? Why would a girl leave a great guy for another guy? No matter what, some people will always want more than what they have and will hurt others in the process to get to where they want to be. Some people chase after fancy cars or job promotions or random ass but will they ever be truly happy if they get what they want? I don’t think so.

Again, I’m sorry to hear about what happened to you in the past :(

Originally Posted by Yataghan50
I started PE because of a combination of things.

Firstly, my Dad has a huge flaccid. Thicker than mine is when erect - I’d put it at about 6” girth. That always made me feel insecure. Especially because Dad didn’t seem to have much to offer Mom, other than a huge penis - so I felt it a prerequisite to having a woman.

Second I didn’t have normal erections until I was about 19 because of a venous leak. A whole childhood of when sexuality was supposed to develop and mature was missed out on. I felt inferior because I didn’t have the sex instinct - the instinct from spontaneous erections to put it in a woman and feel close to them. I missed the boat. All I knew was to awkwardly rub a semi, numb penis and have weak pathetic orgasms which were basically dry. I couldn’t imagine sex involing someone else until I learnt it was supposed to - my dick was a useless piece of grissle, the instinct to do something with it just wasn’t there and did not develop. So… I became obsessed with developing a normal sexual drive desire and function

Now when I am with a girl I get decent erections, shoot pretty big forceful loads and usually get positive comments regarding size. But I still feel different because of my past, still feel inadequate, and I don’t know if it will ever change.

I’m glad things are looking up for you and don’t worry those feeling will change, dam I still didn’t feel big when I was 8 inches it took a while.:)


I haven't failed, I've found 10,000 ways that don't work. Thomas Edison (1847-1931)

Originally Posted by Dino9X7
I’m glad things are looking up for you and don’t worry those feeling will change, dam I still didn’t feel big when I was 8 inches it took a while.:)

Cheers man. Things are atleast much better than they were a few years ago that’s for sure.

Originally Posted by RootCap
And some even have ISSUES that you’re not going to resolve. Take it as a sign to move on.

RootCap, I think we went to the same school of thought.

Well, as for me, I have had my wake-up calls all my life. It has been building up for a long time, and the thought that I could be judged based on something I cannot change was making me want to drop an A-bomb on the world. I feel like this is going to be a long post and I apologize for that in advance, and my English is far from perfect. I do not feel proud about spilling my beans over 4 pages.

Realization that I am smaller than average

Back in school, I was once at a friend’s house, I came by to download a couple of computer games from him. So he fires up Sexonix and at some point whips it out.. I kid you not, that was at least 8 inches long (though no more than 3.5 girth), I remember looking at it from the side and realizing that penises come in different sizes. I knew that his must be extraordinary and I though that I was average, and besides, I did not even think that THAT is such a big concern in life.

At some point in my life, I had a first girlfriend. She was adventurous (what a nice word for “slutty”), and we did some fooling around. I will never forget that expression on her face and her words.. “Why is it so small?” How do you answer a question like that? Especially when it comes from somebody you love or at least you think you love and when it’s supposedly mutual? I could not mutter anything besides “Well.. That’s all I got.” That was the first blow to my sanity. Knowing that I was inadequate, inferior, not worth being even liked by someone because of something in my pants, something so insignificant and being helpless about it, maybe it was more than I could handle. I still think that I never had another girlfriend in high school because maybe she was spreading rumors. I have recently found out that some of the dirty details of our relationship have been talked about between girls even in the last year of high school, which got me thinking if they were also talking about how I size-up.

Our relationship was strange. I knew she was cheating on me and I was still madly in love with her. And I mean, how would she know what the right size is? Maybe it was because she was cheating on me with that guy who had and 8-inch penis, and I knew that she was, I knew they spent too much time together for some reason besides friendship, I saw that dreamy look in her eyes, but not when she was looking at me, but at him.. We still were going out, but there was a lot of tension between us, and the relationship kind of slid into a silent break-up. I had good friendships with girls, not “boy-girl” friendship, but I could get along with them pretty well before we started going out, but I lost a lot of friends, I felt alone for several years. I still do not know what they think of me nowadays, I ended up dating once or twice a few of them, but it never went past going out.

I probably could have lived with being judged by a single female who had seen me naked, after all she was a spiteful bitch and a size-queen, maybe my situation was not so bad, I could see myself as “average” or “lower end of average”. But hearing other people discuss sizes made me realize during my teens that I really was below average.

I have to admit that I was borderline obese since the age of 9-10, I still try to blame my parents for allowing this, I mean, where were they looking? My hormones were messed up, I could have ended up having boobs or becoming sterile, and they did not do a god damn thing to stop me from shoveling food down my throat. By the age of 14 I was eating portions bigger than my dad’s. I had to see an endocrinologist (she was a fat cow herself) twice a year, and she would constantly joke about the “mirror” symptom. When I asked her about what it is, she explained that that is when you can only see your private bits in a mirror, ha-ha, very funny, bitch. I also remember my grandma laughing with her, I felt horrible at that time. And she wouldn’t do anything besides gossiping with my grandmother and joking about my weight, which made more likely to eat bigger and bigger portions. My weight has remained quite high until a couple of months ago. I have spent my 19th birthday on a treadmill. I lost 14 kg’s and I am now borderline normal/overweight. 10 more kg’s and maybe I will start feeling OK.

I had phimosis (wow, I was a really sick kid). That is, I had it until a pretty late age, until I got circumcised. Now there is nothing wrong with being circumcised and I felt finally relieved that I no longer had any problems “down there”, but one detail stuck in my memory. My own mother asking the surgeon after the operation if “it is going to be any bigger”. To which he replied most delicately, saying that it is in there and that it is perfectly normal, and that it is just covered by a fat pad, and if I lose weight, I will be perfectly normal. But the fact that my mother who is supposed to be considerate and understanding was judging my DICK SIZE.. Well, you know how that would feel. I fell extra pressure and I feel like I’ve “failed” my dad. I’ve only seen him naked once when he was running out of the shower to grab a towel, and his flaccid hang is way below the balls AND he is 6 foot-something AND he is pretty much successful in life, my complete opposite. Sometimes I feel inadequate to the point of thinking that maybe he would have preferred to have somebody else as his son.

All those small bits have stuck in my memory making me think that I am badly-endowed and no amount of measuring and comparing to reports will be able to fix that (I am supposed to be within the average limits even according to LifeStyles). Knowing that I am below-average was bad enough, but the final blow was the..

Realization of what being well-endowed means

I guess that I got paranoid, but I couldn’t get the thought of being rejected based on how I measure up out of my head. And all I could do was connect the dots that I got rejected based on that in favor of somebody who had a huge advantage over me. So I figured that being well-endowed must have a lot of benefits.

Then came the porn. And you know what everybody looks like in porn. Seeing as how I have never seen an average penis in my life, combined with the effect of porn, my perception of “average” shifted upwards. And those guys in porn were actually getting “attention” from women, and combined with titles like “[MILFs|Teens|Pornstars|etc] like it big” got me thinking that if you’re big, you’ll have lots of sex. And isn’t that what we all want? I felt that relationships come with sex, not the other way around, not that sex comes with relationships. And seeing how in Sex and the City all relationships seemed to start in bed, I felt that I was right.

Thinking about it now, that stupid show gave me lots of wrong (or maybe not) ideas, like that if you want to be a fireman, you have to be a hunk and have to have pole-dancing skills :D But they were also vocal about sizes. Seeing how Samantha had sex with a postman/courier just because he had something big in his pants further fortified my idea that if you want to have relationships, you need a big dick. If you do not, you can just f*** off and die. That was the loud and clear message of the whole show. Sex and the City for guys is the equivalent of Cosmopolitan for women. I try to repeat that as a mantra, but it does not help.

Going back to porn, does anybody remember Ron Jeremy? That guy basically proved my theory that if you are “not very attractive”, short (I’m 5’6 just like Ron) and have a hairy back, you can still make a successful career out of your dick and become a celebrity! Do I need to say that everybody knows who John Holmes is? What is it like to have your name known in the whole world just because of having a gigantic slab of meat? Jonah Falcon is not yet an absolute celebrity, but he is pretty well-known despite being an ugly arrogant guy attached to a 13-inch cock. How do I know he’s arrogant? The guy is writing a screenplay dedicated to his penis, for Christ’s sake! All that just proves that being well-endowed opens a lot of paths in your life.

Going back to my school years, after feeling all alone in the world for several years I finally found a true friend who remains my best mate even today, even though we live in different countries now. He does have a problem with women though. No, not the lack of them, they all LOVE him (just shows how much confidence means in our world), but he can never get out of a relationship. No matter how hard he tries, they always come back, as if they are magically attracted to him, as if there is something he provides them with that they cannot live without, as if they are willing to sacrifice whatever dignity they have and come crawling back. And while is generally a good-natured guy (a bit too bitchy sometimes) and is generally fun to be around, I cannot see anything so special about him that would make somebody THAT much attracted to him. So he got a new girlfriend. Who was 22. So, an experienced gal. They were going out for 2 years and I would sometimes talk to her in I’M, and once we got talking about relationships in general. She literally told me that when I start my sex life, I should ask HIM for TIPS. So that meant that he must have been pretty good in bed (and that got me into the vicious circle of women want somebody experienced in bed - you cannot get any experience without women - you cannot get any experience - you cannot get any sex - you cannot get any experience).

His most recent girlfriend was a real bitch, and he didn’t even like her any more. Once me and him got talking about Ron Jeremy and the conversation shifted in the area of being able to survive without women and being able to give yourself a little something involving being a gymnast (boy that sounds weird). I try to incorporate stretches in my workouts and I can put my foot behind my head, so I am moderately stretched, and I can only reach the very tip of my penis with the very tip of my tongue and it takes a tremendous effort and a completely empty gut, but that is a great achievement for me. He cannot even touch his nose with hist big toe, but he can touch “it” with his tongue no problem. When I asked him in a by-the-way manner just how long is he, he said he doesn’t know but that last girlfriend told him he is big. And they just broke up. We were actually doing a bit of a long-distance drinking in Skype and I heard him on the phone to her, it was pretty brutal. I can bet that she will come crawling back for more, she always has. So what does that mean? Does that mean that a guy can be a complete asshole to a girl but be great in bed (and well-endowed, he probably has a 2-inch advantage over me at the very least judging by how badly stretched he is) and still “get some”? And here I am, a nice guy with a small dick and I’ve never had a proper relationship. Kind of hard not to draw any conclusions.

And I nearly forgot to mention that I’ve recently relocated to Australia. Well, everybody here towers me. I’ve never used the shower at the gym I used to go to, so I cannot compare penile sizes, but in terms of height, I am a dwarf. In my country of origin that height is about 2 inches below average and is pretty much acceptable. Add that to my inferiority complex. While browsing some dating sites I have noticed that for every 100 women there are 1000 guys, half of which are well over 6 foot or in case of “adult dating” have the picture of their humongous cock as the avatar. That only further adds to the feeling of being unwanted.

I went back home recently for a few weeks and for the first time in the past 2 years I felt that I was not a freak. I am too proud to admit to anybody that I am unhappy here and that I have wasted the last few years of my life doing anything short of ripping my ass apart just to stay here. Don’t get me wrong, it is a great country, if you do not have any mental problems preventing you from enjoying it that is.

That pretty much sums up all that lead me to feeling hugely inferior. Looking back at all that text, I feel like I a whiny kid and an attention whore. I’ve never shared all that with anybody but for the first time in years this thread seemed to be an appropriate place to do so. I have mental problems, I admit it. I tried following that up but was too embarrassed to get into counseling. It attributes to my social problems and prevents me from living my life to the fullest. But instead of dwelling on how screwed up the humanity is for obsessing with dick size, by seeing how hundreds or thousands of people have changed their lives here, I now know that I can too. Even if I get a centimeter a year, I will just have to keep at it for 10 years. Just reading Bib’s, YGuy’s, Kingpole’s, Maxxx’s and all other PEers results and experiences gives me hope and determination to do whatever it takes.

I am also doing the shinbone lengthening routine from easyheight.com and hope to see some results in 2 years (2 inches to my height would make me average, lower end of average, but goddamn acceptable), and most of the supplements I take can have positive effect on both vertical and horizontal sizes (protein, HGH boosters, NO boosters, vitamins, calcium).

Once again, sorry for writing this much.


Starting (Aug 2008): BPEL 5.5 x 4.50, BPSFL 6

Current post-workout (May 2009): BPEL 6.5 x 4.55, BPSFL 7, NBPEL 5 :( Weird string girth measurements: MSG 4.75, BG 5.25

Wonder if those are gains or if I just learned to push the ruler into the fat pad :/

mikebrahmin,

Sorry to hear about your story. Some of it is pretty crazy. And the comments women make can really crush a person!

Don’t worry, though. A lot of us here at Thunders will be here to support you along the way!

Welcome :D

mikebrahmin,

You’ve got a lot on your mind. No need to apologize. Welcome!


For Lampwick, becoming hung like a donkey was the result of a total commitment.

mikebrahmin

Welcome to the forum, you found thunders and you have the fuel to motivate you to get some gains so go for it bro and good luck:) .


I haven't failed, I've found 10,000 ways that don't work. Thomas Edison (1847-1931)

Hi and welcome mikebrahmin.

I really don’t know if the getting taller stuff works; I certainly hope it does for your sake. Now as far as PE goes? Oh hell yes! The most important thing for gains in PE is motivation and consistency. It sounds like you have the long view already in place and are quite motivated so you are good to go.

You are working on the weight which is good. It will make you healthier, free up under-fat penis, and make you feel better about yourself. For all of those same reasons I would advise not stopping when you have slimed down. Go right back the other way and start putting the weight back on, this time as muscle.

I would advise most strongly learning a martial art if at all possible as well. It is good for your health, both in body and mind. It is a very good “guy skill” to have. It is a good anybody skill to be able to protect yourself a bit. If you are 1/2 a head shorter than the other guys it is good for self esteem as well. All sorts of reasons, give it some thought. Find out what is available in your area and be realistic in your choices.

Serious life change stuff here: Go learn Wing Chun, http://www.wingchun.com.au/ . The bio-mechanics of much of the trapping offers distinct advantages to the shorter of two opponents in a fight. Also learn cultural skills and Mandarin or Cantonese. Eventually take you language skills, your cultural skills, ( including WC), and what ever it is you do for a living and move! Either to somewhere with a large Chine town or to China its self. Guess what, you are now tall!


Running a Massive Co-Front.

mikebrahmin I see that you have gained 1/2 ” BPFSL? That half inch will catch up with your BPEL in a month or two don’t worry :-) So, try to forget all that has gone before and have fun with your new length and the confidence that goes with it.

I haven’t read all the responses, but ouch I could see why that would hurt! & No I have never said that to my husband.

Originally Posted by mikebrahmin
Well, as for me, I have had my wake-up calls all my life. It has been building up for a long time, and the thought that I could be judged based on something I cannot change was making me want to drop an A-bomb on the world. I feel like this is going to be a long post and I apologize for that in advance, and my English is far from perfect. I do not feel proud about spilling my beans over 4 pages.

Realization that I am smaller than average

Back in school, I was once at a friend’s house, I came by to download a couple of computer games from him. So he fires up Sexonix and at some point whips it out.. I kid you not, that was at least 8 inches long (though no more than 3.5 girth), I remember looking at it from the side and realizing that penises come in different sizes. I knew that his must be extraordinary and I though that I was average, and besides, I did not even think that THAT is such a big concern in life.

At some point in my life, I had a first girlfriend. She was adventurous (what a nice word for “slutty”), and we did some fooling around. I will never forget that expression on her face and her words.. “Why is it so small?” How do you answer a question like that? Especially when it comes from somebody you love or at least you think you love and when it’s supposedly mutual? I could not mutter anything besides “Well.. That’s all I got.” That was the first blow to my sanity. Knowing that I was inadequate, inferior, not worth being even liked by someone because of something in my pants, something so insignificant and being helpless about it, maybe it was more than I could handle. I still think that I never had another girlfriend in high school because maybe she was spreading rumors. I have recently found out that some of the dirty details of our relationship have been talked about between girls even in the last year of high school, which got me thinking if they were also talking about how I size-up.

Our relationship was strange. I knew she was cheating on me and I was still madly in love with her. And I mean, how would she know what the right size is? Maybe it was because she was cheating on me with that guy who had and 8-inch penis, and I knew that she was, I knew they spent too much time together for some reason besides friendship, I saw that dreamy look in her eyes, but not when she was looking at me, but at him.. We still were going out, but there was a lot of tension between us, and the relationship kind of slid into a silent break-up. I had good friendships with girls, not “boy-girl” friendship, but I could get along with them pretty well before we started going out, but I lost a lot of friends, I felt alone for several years. I still do not know what they think of me nowadays, I ended up dating once or twice a few of them, but it never went past going out.

I probably could have lived with being judged by a single female who had seen me naked, after all she was a spiteful bitch and a size-queen, maybe my situation was not so bad, I could see myself as “average” or “lower end of average”. But hearing other people discuss sizes made me realize during my teens that I really was below average.

I have to admit that I was borderline obese since the age of 9-10, I still try to blame my parents for allowing this, I mean, where were they looking? My hormones were messed up, I could have ended up having boobs or becoming sterile, and they did not do a god damn thing to stop me from shoveling food down my throat. By the age of 14 I was eating portions bigger than my dad’s. I had to see an endocrinologist (she was a fat cow herself) twice a year, and she would constantly joke about the “mirror” symptom. When I asked her about what it is, she explained that that is when you can only see your private bits in a mirror, ha-ha, very funny, bitch. I also remember my grandma laughing with her, I felt horrible at that time. And she wouldn’t do anything besides gossiping with my grandmother and joking about my weight, which made more likely to eat bigger and bigger portions. My weight has remained quite high until a couple of months ago. I have spent my 19th birthday on a treadmill. I lost 14 kg’s and I am now borderline normal/overweight. 10 more kg’s and maybe I will start feeling OK.

I had phimosis (wow, I was a really sick kid). That is, I had it until a pretty late age, until I got circumcised. Now there is nothing wrong with being circumcised and I felt finally relieved that I no longer had any problems “down there”, but one detail stuck in my memory. My own mother asking the surgeon after the operation if “it is going to be any bigger”. To which he replied most delicately, saying that it is in there and that it is perfectly normal, and that it is just covered by a fat pad, and if I lose weight, I will be perfectly normal. But the fact that my mother who is supposed to be considerate and understanding was judging my DICK SIZE.. Well, you know how that would feel. I fell extra pressure and I feel like I’ve “failed” my dad. I’ve only seen him naked once when he was running out of the shower to grab a towel, and his flaccid hang is way below the balls AND he is 6 foot-something AND he is pretty much successful in life, my complete opposite. Sometimes I feel inadequate to the point of thinking that maybe he would have preferred to have somebody else as his son.

All those small bits have stuck in my memory making me think that I am badly-endowed and no amount of measuring and comparing to reports will be able to fix that (I am supposed to be within the average limits even according to LifeStyles). Knowing that I am below-average was bad enough, but the final blow was the..

Realization of what being well-endowed means

I guess that I got paranoid, but I couldn’t get the thought of being rejected based on how I measure up out of my head. And all I could do was connect the dots that I got rejected based on that in favor of somebody who had a huge advantage over me. So I figured that being well-endowed must have a lot of benefits.

Then came the porn. And you know what everybody looks like in porn. Seeing as how I have never seen an average penis in my life, combined with the effect of porn, my perception of “average” shifted upwards. And those guys in porn were actually getting “attention” from women, and combined with titles like “[MILFs|Teens|Pornstars|etc] like it big” got me thinking that if you’re big, you’ll have lots of sex. And isn’t that what we all want? I felt that relationships come with sex, not the other way around, not that sex comes with relationships. And seeing how in Sex and the City all relationships seemed to start in bed, I felt that I was right.

Thinking about it now, that stupid show gave me lots of wrong (or maybe not) ideas, like that if you want to be a fireman, you have to be a hunk and have to have pole-dancing skills :D But they were also vocal about sizes. Seeing how Samantha had sex with a postman/courier just because he had something big in his pants further fortified my idea that if you want to have relationships, you need a big dick. If you do not, you can just f*** off and die. That was the loud and clear message of the whole show. Sex and the City for guys is the equivalent of Cosmopolitan for women. I try to repeat that as a mantra, but it does not help.

Going back to porn, does anybody remember Ron Jeremy? That guy basically proved my theory that if you are “not very attractive”, short (I’m 5’6 just like Ron) and have a hairy back, you can still make a successful career out of your dick and become a celebrity! Do I need to say that everybody knows who John Holmes is? What is it like to have your name known in the whole world just because of having a gigantic slab of meat? Jonah Falcon is not yet an absolute celebrity, but he is pretty well-known despite being an ugly arrogant guy attached to a 13-inch cock. How do I know he’s arrogant? The guy is writing a screenplay dedicated to his penis, for Christ’s sake! All that just proves that being well-endowed opens a lot of paths in your life.

Going back to my school years, after feeling all alone in the world for several years I finally found a true friend who remains my best mate even today, even though we live in different countries now. He does have a problem with women though. No, not the lack of them, they all LOVE him (just shows how much confidence means in our world), but he can never get out of a relationship. No matter how hard he tries, they always come back, as if they are magically attracted to him, as if there is something he provides them with that they cannot live without, as if they are willing to sacrifice whatever dignity they have and come crawling back. And while is generally a good-natured guy (a bit too bitchy sometimes) and is generally fun to be around, I cannot see anything so special about him that would make somebody THAT much attracted to him. So he got a new girlfriend. Who was 22. So, an experienced gal. They were going out for 2 years and I would sometimes talk to her in I’M, and once we got talking about relationships in general. She literally told me that when I start my sex life, I should ask HIM for TIPS. So that meant that he must have been pretty good in bed (and that got me into the vicious circle of women want somebody experienced in bed - you cannot get any experience without women - you cannot get any experience - you cannot get any sex - you cannot get any experience).

His most recent girlfriend was a real bitch, and he didn’t even like her any more. Once me and him got talking about Ron Jeremy and the conversation shifted in the area of being able to survive without women and being able to give yourself a little something involving being a gymnast (boy that sounds weird). I try to incorporate stretches in my workouts and I can put my foot behind my head, so I am moderately stretched, and I can only reach the very tip of my penis with the very tip of my tongue and it takes a tremendous effort and a completely empty gut, but that is a great achievement for me. He cannot even touch his nose with hist big toe, but he can touch “it” with his tongue no problem. When I asked him in a by-the-way manner just how long is he, he said he doesn’t know but that last girlfriend told him he is big. And they just broke up. We were actually doing a bit of a long-distance drinking in Skype and I heard him on the phone to her, it was pretty brutal. I can bet that she will come crawling back for more, she always has. So what does that mean? Does that mean that a guy can be a complete asshole to a girl but be great in bed (and well-endowed, he probably has a 2-inch advantage over me at the very least judging by how badly stretched he is) and still “get some”? And here I am, a nice guy with a small dick and I’ve never had a proper relationship. Kind of hard not to draw any conclusions.

And I nearly forgot to mention that I’ve recently relocated to Australia. Well, everybody here towers me. I’ve never used the shower at the gym I used to go to, so I cannot compare penile sizes, but in terms of height, I am a dwarf. In my country of origin that height is about 2 inches below average and is pretty much acceptable. Add that to my inferiority complex. While browsing some dating sites I have noticed that for every 100 women there are 1000 guys, half of which are well over 6 foot or in case of “adult dating” have the picture of their humongous cock as the avatar. That only further adds to the feeling of being unwanted.

I went back home recently for a few weeks and for the first time in the past 2 years I felt that I was not a freak. I am too proud to admit to anybody that I am unhappy here and that I have wasted the last few years of my life doing anything short of ripping my ass apart just to stay here. Don’t get me wrong, it is a great country, if you do not have any mental problems preventing you from enjoying it that is.

That pretty much sums up all that lead me to feeling hugely inferior. Looking back at all that text, I feel like I a whiny kid and an attention whore. I’ve never shared all that with anybody but for the first time in years this thread seemed to be an appropriate place to do so. I have mental problems, I admit it. I tried following that up but was too embarrassed to get into counseling. It attributes to my social problems and prevents me from living my life to the fullest. But instead of dwelling on how screwed up the humanity is for obsessing with dick size, by seeing how hundreds or thousands of people have changed their lives here, I now know that I can too. Even if I get a centimeter a year, I will just have to keep at it for 10 years. Just reading Bib’s, YGuy’s, Kingpole’s, Maxxx’s and all other PEers results and experiences gives me hope and determination to do whatever it takes.

I am also doing the shinbone lengthening routine from easyheight.com and hope to see some results in 2 years (2 inches to my height would make me average, lower end of average, but goddamn acceptable), and most of the supplements I take can have positive effect on both vertical and horizontal sizes (protein, HGH boosters, NO boosters, vitamins, calcium).

Once again, sorry for writing this much.

Mike you have a lot of issues around self perception and of course a big part of that is related to your “projections” - things that you ascribe to others which might not actually exist but which reflect your own anxieties. This is something a good therapist can assist you with. For example, your emotional damage from your relationship with your folks, like your mom’s comments of concern which you took to be critical and judgemental (she was clearly simply concerned about your health and wanted to know if there was a problem).

As for your father, all men experience feelings of not living up to a father’s expectations. As children we can never eclipse our older, stronger, wiser, phsyically superior father. It is an endless quest. Only as we mature can we achieve parity with an adult male. The mind however, being a timeless repository of memories and emotions, doesn’t mature at the same rate as the body. This is the source of many neurotic conditions. This is one reason dad’s put so much pressure on their sons.

As for the porn and the comparisons to others, much of it from society and the media, you are in the right place to find out the real story. There is huge variance between normal or average, and the things that porn or Hollywood focus on. Their work product revolves around fantasy, “ideals” as construed by fantasy, and drama (making more of something than is really there). This is why porn is a huge contributor to body dysmorphia, and why most men who show up in urologist’s office’s for treatment of micropenis are actually in the “normal” range. Not “porn normal”, but real world normal. If the NBPEL length of most men is roughly 5 inches, there are roughly as many 4 inch men as 6 inch men, as many 3 inch men as 7 inch men. It’s not a perfect distribution, but it’s not far off either.


4/2008 Bpel 6.50, Beg 5.5, Mseg 4.9

6/2008 Bpel 6.75, Beg 5.5, Mseg 5.1

9/2008 Bpel 7.00, Beg 5.5, Mseg 5.1

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