I Kid You Not
I’m a stealth PEer so the wife doesn’t have a clue about my hobby. After a year of work, it’s mindboggling that she has not noticed my gains downstairs: going from small (regular Trojan condoms were loose) to medium-large (same condoms are uncomfortably tight.)
The other day she was giving me an odd look like: “Hmmm, something’s going on.”
I asked her why she was looking at me with an odd expression.
She tilted her head to one side, kept staring at my face and said, “Is it my imagination or is your nose bigger?” Totally serious. “Have you been pulling on it at night?”
I had to laugh at the irony. Relieved.
In her defense, though, she is fixated on noses in general and hers in particular. She had a nose job to make it “prettier” but it didn’t turn out quite to her satisfaction. She’ll see someone on tv and say, “I really like her nose…. I wish I had that nose.”
Maybe it’s true what they say about the size of a man’s nose. Maybe the two are mystically linked. Haha… one day she’ll wake up and find herself sleeping next to an elephant.