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GF says I'm selfish for doing PE

Originally Posted by Lampwick
I’m going to disagree just a little bit. If you’re married, or in a serious and committed relationship, you (and your body parts) don’t belong to just yourself. What you do with them matters a lot to someone else, and that should influence your decisions, even if the extent of the influence is just considering the other person’s point of view.

Let me give a non-PE example. Before I was in a serious, committed relationship, I kept my hair quite short. My hair is not great hair, and short means lower maintenance and longer time between necessary haircuts. My SO liked my hair better a little longer. No one would call my hair long now, but it is longer than it used to be. She has to look at it; I don’t. It’s still not a lot of work to care for.

Someone who wants to rip their dick off or get giant silicone boobs against the wishes of their partner is saying that ripping their dick off or having giant silicone boobs is more important than their relationship. I realize that those are extreme and absurd examples. I’m just saying that if you’re in a relationship, you, your body and your life are not entirely your own. If you think they are, then you’re not a couple; you’re just two people who happen to be together.

Well… I must say that this makes no sense at all to me… honestly.
In any case, anywhere in the world, if you don’t own yourself you’re a slave of someone else. :(
As a father don’t OWN his children since they’re not stuff, they’re ‘free’ people, a wife or any partner can’t own anything of anybody’s body.

I do agree that it’s selfish, if you’re on a relationship, to don’t care and step over your partner’s opinion without giving any consideration.
BUT it’s even more selfish to PRETEND you own something and to VET somebody’s action assuming that you own that person and have rights over his actions on himself!

:)

It only makes no sense if you don’t really understand it;) .

It’s not about ‘being owned’ by the other person. It’s about you willingly giving your whole self to the other person - out of free will. Not a total freedom, but not a slavery either. That’s commitment;) .

My personal opinion is this revolves mostly around the way girls think. Most girls, even wives, are not going to give an honest opinion of your physical self. They’ll talk to you very honestly about feelings, how you treat them, listening, etc. But steer well away from complete honesty when discussing your looks or changing your body.

Jealousy can always be a part of it but it mostly stems from the way they feel about their own bodies. She’s not going to tell the man she loves that he needs a bigger cock because that would mean she thinks the current one is small. The same way if she asked you if you thought it’d be a good idea to get a boob job; you say yes and immediately she thinks her breasts are too small.

This applies to “Do I look fat?” to “Do you like my new hair?” etc. Etc. Etc.

If you want an honest answer from her, you have to ask her in a way that doesn’t make her feel like she is going to be hurting you by telling you the truth.


Starting Stats Oct 29, 2007: 7 3/8" BPEL; 5 3/8" EG

Nov 7, 2007 7 3/4" BPEL; 5 3/8" EG

Goal: 8x6

Originally Posted by kwon47
My personal opinion is this revolves mostly around the way girls think. Most girls, even wives, are not going to give an honest opinion of your physical self. They’ll talk to you very honestly about feelings, how you treat them, listening, etc. But steer well away from complete honesty when discussing your looks or changing your body.

Jealousy can always be a part of it but it mostly stems from the way they feel about their own bodies. She’s not going to tell the man she loves that he needs a bigger cock because that would mean she thinks the current one is small. The same way if she asked you if you thought it’d be a good idea to get a boob job; you say yes and immediately she thinks her breasts are too small.

This applies to “Do I look fat?” to “Do you like my new hair?” etc. Etc. Etc.

If you want an honest answer from her, you have to ask her in a way that doesn’t make her feel like she is going to be hurting you by telling you the truth.


You’ve made some good points.

Originally Posted by Boo-Ya
Well… I must say that this makes no sense at all to me… honestly.
In any case, anywhere in the world, if you don’t own yourself you’re a slave of someone else. :(
As a father don’t OWN his children since they’re not stuff, they’re ‘free’ people, a wife or any partner can’t own anything of anybody’s body.

I do agree that it’s selfish, if you’re on a relationship, to don’t care and step over your partner’s opinion without giving any consideration.
BUT it’s even more selfish to PRETEND you own something and to VET somebody’s action assuming that you own that person and have rights over his actions on himself!

:)


Boo-Ya: It’s not about ‘owning yourself’ or not ‘owning yourself.’ It’s also not about ‘being owned’ by someone else.

It’s about being part of something bigger than just yourself. It’s a couple being more than the sum of two individuals.

Touchmyrod started this thread off by writing “I told her how much I want to gain in both length and girth and she’s against it.” It occurred to me that it’s pertinent for me to mention that I have not had that discussion with MY significant other. I didn’t ask permission, and I didn’t feel that it was necessary to do so. I see a difference between getting a haircut (it’ll grow back) or doing some ordinary PE (with gradual, incremental results) and doing major body alterations like a woman getting implants, or as in your example, ‘ripping your dick off.’

My significant other had very long and lovely hair. She got it cut short (also very lovely, but in a different way). It would take years for it to get back to the length it was. We talked about it before she did it. Not because she had to; she is her own person, and she knew that she didn’t have to get ‘permission’ from me. I didn’t get involved with her merely for her hair; I told her that I would love her if she were as bald as Lt. Saavik. But as part of a couple, she chose to involve me in a decision that was hers to make, but which did affect me as well. If she had just gone out one day and come home with short hair, that would’ve been unsettling to me, and not because of the hair. It would be because she had chosen to make such a major change and for whatever reason, had not see fit to include me in the process.

The results of my PE has been that my equipment works better, and sex is more frequent and mutually more satisfying since I’ve started PE, so she’s had no complaints about it in that respect. In one way, it’s good that PE results are gradual. If my sex life starts to suffer in the future because I am getting TOO large, I could just decide to taper down to a maintenance routine, as others have here. And if she noticed that I was larger and asked about it, I would be honest with her.

But I understand your point, Boo-Ya. When does someone being involved in your life and your decisions stop being reasonable and start being unreasonable? Just because you are part of a couple does not mean that you give away all control over your life and your decisions.

Originally Posted by BadMr
It only makes no sense if you don’t really understand it;) .

It’s not about ‘being owned’ by the other person. It’s about you willingly giving your whole self to the other person - out of free will. Not a total freedom, but not a slavery either. That’s commitment;) .


BadMr:

You understood perfectly what I was trying to say.


For Lampwick, becoming hung like a donkey was the result of a total commitment.

Originally Posted by touchmyrod
I told her how much I want to gain in both length and girth and she’s against it. She says it’s perfect the way it is and says she couldn’t handle anymore. We’ve been together 7 yrs, have 1 kid and we do plan on getting married when finances will allow us to. I’m the only one she’s ever been with so I think that has a lot to do with it. When she asked why I told her for my own insecurities and she said it sounds like I am going to cheat on her since she thinks it’s perfect.big actually. Plus I don’t want to gain that much anyways.

She does think it’s big because this morning I flashed her and eyes just lit up and I was completely flaccid and quite a few times ill go jump in bed in only boxer briefs and when she comes in the room she’ll ask what I stuffed in there. That made me feel good because she said do you have my sock in there, then pulled off my boxers and said oh my god it looks so big.so what is a man to do in this kind of situation?

A) Marry her and thank your lucky stars you have her.

B1) Let her forget you PE and keep it low key. She’ll like the new growth, she’s just antimidated, now. I’d say she’s not being selfish, just a little scared . She doesn’t want her good thing getting ruined. And, sudden changes in behavior or urges for physical self improvement are signs of unfaithfulness. So, she has reason to be worried.

or

B2) If she really is happy, then don’t worry about it. If your woman has only been with you (so you don’t have to live up to her memories of other men)and thinks your dick is awesome, why PE. You already have all a man could ask for.

By the way, did I mention marry her ASAP? If you catch a keeper it’s best to get it in the net before you drop it in the water by accident .

Originally Posted by Boo-Ya
I think you don’t have to ask her a thing. This may sound stupid and agressive but your dick is just as it says, YOURS.

If you’re worried about causing any kind of pain or discomfort on her THEN it sounds acceptable (that’s what she states but I honestly suspect since you were her first).

Any other case it’s just selfishness of her, besides, I don’t think ANYBODY can have any rights from any part of your body. She’s your wife, not your owner. If you say to me that you want to rip your dick off or if she says to you that she wants to have giant silicone boobs, what could we say? We can only give our opinions (don’t rip it off, it’s very useful :D - I like your breasts the way they are/I wouldn’t like them to be very big/etc.), it would be very selfish (and illogical since we don’t have that right) if we put things that way - don’t do it, I don’t want YOU to do what you CAN do with YOUR body even if YOU want to.

:)

P.S.: Show her these posts, maybe she’ll change her mind. ;)
P.S.2: Search and show her the posts stating the amazing things PE did to a relationship (and for women’s pleasure). :)

The thing I have to say about this opinion is, what if your wife wanted her pussy sown shut and a dick attached? Would you have a right to say something about that? After all, you married a woman and it will effect your sex. That sounds extreme, but it is essentially the same thing.

Originally Posted by BadMr
It only makes no sense if you don’t really understand it.

It’s not about ‘being owned’ by the other person. It’s about you willingly giving your whole self to the other person - out of free will. Not a total freedom, but not a slavery either. That’s commitment.

We can never give ourselves (our whole-selves even less) to anybody. This is a silly romantic myth. :)
What we feel is EXCLUSIVELY ours, no one can ever feel what another person is feeling. We like to pretend we do so but it’s just a pretension.
Through culture we learn some basic conduct stuff (and beliefs) among other things that makes acquaintance possible. Sometimes we slip to think that there’s such thing as ‘one’ and pretend somebody feels exactly what we feel. Unfortunately (or fortunately) this is, AT LEAST, a biological impossibility.

All I’m saying is that I think that this kind of commitment is naive and even insane in a way. Your body is where your whole-self is, it’s been with you since you were born and it’s going to be with you until you die. I think is selfish to yourself to PRETEND (and I’ll explain why this is just pretension) giving another person the rights over you.

What if she/he says “Get fat, I want you fat!” or “Be a bodybuilder!”. Even I think it’s crazy, you might consider it, right?
What if she/he says “Chop your little finger to prove your love”. Will you consider it? I guess not… and you what this means? This means that you are entirely and ONLY YOURS! :)

Relationships revolves around sacrifices (I know that) but even so, I think that all we can do is give our opinions, tell our partners how we feel about it, what we think about it… but owning? Vetting? We couldn’t do that even if we want to.

It’s a proof (I think) of ‘disloving’ having our partners doing with his body what we want rather than what he/she wants.

Originally Posted by devilknight666
The thing I have to say about this opinion is, what if your wife wanted her pussy sown shut and a dick attached? Would you have a right to say something about that? After all, you married a woman and it will effect your sex. That sounds extreme, but it is essentially the same thing.

As I said, we can SAY all we need/want.

What we can’t do give a despotic NO - “You won’t do this because I don’t want to!”.
What if she’s happier that way? We couldn’t be together (altough many partners would accept that no problem ;) ), but hey… if it’s gonna make you joyful, how could I complain if I love you so much? ;)


Last edited by Boo-Ya : 11-11-2007 at .

My fiance, who had breast augmentation from before we met, was at first saying the same things about my PE. Then came a few little comments on size growth. Nothing negative really just typical “yeah you’re getting bigger”. After 4 months if I ask, she’s changed her tune a little. She’s now saying things like, “Nah, you’re not growing. In fact I think it shrunk.” She of course says this with a little smile. So I’m under the impression that although she may have insecurities about it, she is enjoying it from a sexual perspective.

I gauge it like this. If her insecurities about this become larger than what I think she’s getting out of it sexually, I’ll go into maintenance mode. Until then, my goals are gauged by reaction in the bedroom. At the end of the day, PE is ultimately about sex. If it’s not working well for us in the bedroom with a comitted partner, then it becomes apparent to your partner that PE efforts are only being persued to boost our egos and that’s when insecurities can set in much more heavily. Perhaps there is a point to that.


Start: 6/30/2007 - (NBPEL 6.25", BPEL - 7"), (Mid EG 5.25") (Base EG 5 3/4")

11/10/2007 - (NBPEL 6.75", BPEL - 7.5"), (Mid EG 5.5") (Base EG 6")

Goal: 7.5 NBPEL, 6" Midshaft EG

Man I am having to some heavy problems on this subject, every-time I will go get laid my GF says “if you continue to make this “thing” bigger it will be impossible for us to have sex”, so my simples solution witch it’s not the most wonder-full one, it’s just say to her that I stoped but I do not stoped.

Originally Posted by Phyriel
Man I am having to some heavy problems on this subject, every-time I will go get laid my GF says “if you continue to make this “thing” bigger it will be impossible for us to have sex”, so my simples solution witch it’s not the most wonder-full one, it’s just say to her that I stoped but I do not stoped.

Your not going to grow that fast and gains tend to slow down as time goes on so I wouldn’t worry about it she will adjust unless she just has a unnaturally tiny pussy. Tell her you just going to do it for health and maintenance of your existing size and then keep on growing and I guarantee she thinking she one the battle of the wills won’t notice your gradual gains. I’m not sure of your size now so if your 9 inches than never mind what I just said:) .


I haven't failed, I've found 10,000 ways that don't work. Thomas Edison (1847-1931)

Another size problem

Hello guyz :D

I was just thinking about that size thing, but seriously, I thing we’ve gone too far with our goals!!

I’ve just made an experiment, and I’m sorry to say that this perfect girth size of 6” is bullshit, and no matter how obsessed I am with my penis size, now matter how confident I am (or not) and no matter what my friends will say in the shower room, I WON’T GET TO THAT SIZE.
And now you’ll ask me why..
Ok .. Because I played a role. I am a girl and I’m trying to give a blowjob to a “STREP BODY MOUSSE” (although I know it’s used for hair removal)
I didn’t even manage to insert it into my mouth, as it was hitting my teeth. Afterwards, I measured it and, SURPRISE: it was 6.1”

So.I’m asking you guys, how many of you ( the 6” -ers ) are enjoying oral sex ? I guess none
How many of you think oral sex (anal sex) is important for complete satisfaction?

Now let’s go to the lenght thing!

That tube is only 7.8” lenght ( this time I couldn’t act like a woman ) but still I am sure that if I was, that thing would explore my stomach.
Yes, we really want to make her scream (we all like it) but there shouldn’t be a painful scream.

So, my friends, I guess that our girlfriends aren’t so happy with us being super-sized.
So let us be just the way God wants us to be (or a little more) and don’t forget that we are perfect. Our biological mechanisms are perfect, Our functions are perfect. Did HE missed to make our cocks bigger in order to please our ladies?

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I was the victim of that (see attach) :P

raoul,

I merged your first copy of this thread with a current thread about size. I don’t want 20 individual threads about size running at the same time. Let me know that you have read this and I will delete it.


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Well my glans is smaller than the rest of my dick so thats how I can still get pretty good head with minimal teeth. I’m still going for more though because head isn’t nearly as important to me as sex, Hell I’d rather make her cum 3 or 4 more times than shove the length of my cock down her throat (even if it is kind of tempting :) ).

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