Thunder's Place

The big penis and mens' sexual health source, increasing penis size around the world.

You know you've been brainwashed by porn when.

Originally Posted by jnicknak

That all nurses and secretaries are itching to get nailed.

Well, not all of them.


Running a Massive Co-Front.

You get arrested by a female officer after she pulls you over and you try to turn it into the next best scene.


Back on Jan 3, 2012 - Stats: FL- 4.5", FG- 4.8", EG- 5.6", EL- 6.1", BPEL- 6.8"

Goal by Jan 1, 2013 - EL- 7.5", EG- 6" -----> I have a LONG way to grow :)

Grow or Die Tryin'

Originally Posted by UM1991
Winner.


That’s winnING, DUH!

You know porn has broke your brain when you think the old punchline,
"Clap”
“I can’t”
"Tight, huh?”

Is a pick up line


WE are the 99% 'WE are the people you depend on; we cook your meals, we haul your trash, we connect your calls. We drive your ambulances. We guard you while you sleep. Don't f&ck with us'-- Madame DeFarge

"Rope trades @$10 a yard. I wonder if they even know that?"- Capitalist

Originally Posted by Para-Goomba

You join an internet forum devoted to enlarging your penis.

LOL, :) .


"If you always put limit on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." -Bruce Lee

The only facial they want comes out of the end of my dick.


Start/April 2011: BPEL - 6.75" / NBPEL - 6.00" / BEG - 5.125 / Mid Shaft - 4.75 / Glans 4.5"

Current/August 8 2011: BPEL 7.25" / NBPEL - 6.375" / BEG - 5.625" / Mid Shaft - 5.00" / Glans - 4.875"

Goals: NBPEL - 8.25" / Mid Shaft EG - 6.00"

You know you’ve been brainwashed by porn when…

You actually believe what’s written in this thread.


I'm a big fan of 50 Cent, or as we call him in Zimbabwe, four hundred million dollars.

Originally Posted by Tossed Salad
You know you’ve been brainwashed by porn when…

You actually believe what’s written in this thread.

Haha, nice.


Start/April 2011: BPEL - 6.75" / NBPEL - 6.00" / BEG - 5.125 / Mid Shaft - 4.75 / Glans 4.5"

Current/August 8 2011: BPEL 7.25" / NBPEL - 6.375" / BEG - 5.625" / Mid Shaft - 5.00" / Glans - 4.875"

Goals: NBPEL - 8.25" / Mid Shaft EG - 6.00"

What I learned by watching porn - by DiamondWinds

What I learned from watching porn:

Originally Posted by DiamondWinds

1. Women wear high heels to bed.
2. Men are never impotent.
3. When going down on a woman 10 seconds is more than satisfactory.
4. If a woman gets busted masturbating by a strange man, she will not scream with embarrassment, but rather insist he have sex with her.
5. Women smile appreciatively when men splat them in the face with sperm.
6. Women enjoy having sex with ugly, middle-aged men.
7. Women moan uncontrollably when giving a blowjob.
8. Women always orgasm when men do.
9. A blowjob will always get a woman off a speeding ticket.
10. All women are noisy fucks.
11. People in the 70’s couldn’t fuck unless there was a wild guitar solo in the background.
12. Those tits are real.
13. A common and enjoyable sexual practice for a man is to take his half-erect penis and slap it repeatedly on a woman’s butt.
14. Men always groan “OH YEAH!” when they cum.
15. If there is two of them they “high five” each other. (and the girl isn’t disgusted!)
16. Double penetration makes women smile.
17. Asian men don’t exist.
18. If you come across a guy and his girlfriend having sex in the bushes, the boyfriend won’t bash seven shades of shit out of you if you shove your cock in his girlfriend’s mouth.
19. There’s a plot.
20. When taking a woman from behind, a man can really excite a woman by giving her a gentle slap on the butt.
21. Nurses suck patient’s cocks.
22. Men always pull out.
23. When your girlfriend busts you getting head from her best friend, she’ll only be momentarily pissed off before fucking the both of you.
24. Women never have headaches… or periods.
25. When a woman is sucking a man’s cock, it’s important for him to remind her to “suck it”.
26. Assholes are clean.
27. A man ejaculating on a woman’s butt is a satisfying result for all parties concerned.
28. Women always look pleasantly surprised when they open a man’s trousers and find a cock there.
29. Men don’t have to beg.
30. When standing during a blowjob, a man will always place one hand firmly on the back of the kneeling woman’s head and the other proudly on his hip.

What to Expect From Sex (as Dictated by Internet Porn)

Another great one from Cracked Magazine.

Thread here: What to Expect From Sex (as Dictated by Internet Porn)

Link and Full text of article:

http://www.cracked.com/article_1524…ernet-porn.html

What to Expect From Sex (as Dictated by Internet Porn)
By: Michael Swaim February 15, 2007

Valentine’s Day has come and gone once again; that magical time when a young man’s idle fancies turn to thoughts of love, and his aggregate monies are frittered away on shiny trinkets he hopes to barter for sex. For many a scrub-faced youth, V-Day is a chance to prove one’s manhood, to lose forever the stigma of approaching thirty with one’s maidenhood and Snood High Score Record still intact. Like a vicious assault on childhood, teenagers all over America yesterday proffered flowers, walked on beaches, and staked tents in their pants. If they were lucky, the awkward, sweaty dance of Love probably followed.

But what to expect out of those first tender moments, those gropings towards adolescence, those mutual statutory rapes? Let us turn, as always, towards Internet pornography, in hopes of sound and somber guidance.

YOUR COCK WILL BE HUGE

Despite any previous worries about your size, the moment you are truly ready to get down and dirty, your penis will spring out of your shorts fully erect and proceed to balloon up like a frightened Blowfish. Veined and rippling, the mere shadow of your engorged member is likely to cause your nymphomaniacal date to chirrup lustily and fall immediately to her knees in worshipful praise. Careful: accidental clubbing is a serious risk.

SHE WILL GLADLY ACCEPT YOU INTO ANY ORIFICE, AND ORGASM LOUDLY THEREFROM

Anal is only the beginning; it’s all fair game. With a little dedication, you could soon be known as “The Ear, Nose and Throat Man.” And even if all logic dictates that she should be at least uncomfortable and at most screaming in horrendous pain, you can rest assured that this kitten will lap it up like so much milk. After all, as any doctor will tell you, ninety-eight percent of the surface area of a woman (internal and external) forms one large bundle of erogenous nerves known as the O-spot. That’s why they get so upset when you try to rub up against them on the bus.

TWO IS COMPANY, BUT SIXTEEN IS A PARTY

This party has a two-girl minimum, and a Maximum Occupancy of ?. Balance them precariously on top of one another, then spin them and play hip-thrust darts. Scatter them about the room and drag your way from one to another on an absinthe-fueled trail of debauch and physical exhaustion. Have sex with them. The point is, more equals better. Unless of course we’re talking dudes; then it’s a whole different equation.

THE NUDE MIDGET RIDING AN ERECT HORSE WILL BOTH DELIGHT AND AMUSE

Variety is the spice of life, they say (again, unless we’re talking dudes). A little horseplay may be just what the doctor ordered, especially after the women have tired of your oversized phallus and require a respite. The midget’s just there to laugh at, and service the horse-woman coupling process. A quick word of advice: make sure your midget is a licensed Bestiality Engineer, preferably with a specialization in Coupling. Using an unlicensed midget isn’t just illegal, but can result in a mass of manes, neighing, and giant fake breasts that will leave your bedroom essentially unusable.

SURELY, HER LESBIAN FRIENDS HAVE ONLY STEPPED OUT MOMENTARILY

Don’t freak out. They’re probably on their way back from the market with a big tub of cool whip, or hiding in the closet with pillows at the ready. Your demure date’s audacious lesbian friends will be by shortly, and when they arrive, the making out will no doubt begin. After all, you like hot chicks, right? So why wouldn’t hot chicks like hot chicks? It just makes good sense.

AFTERWARDS, YOU'RE ALLOWED TO HOLD MONEY OUT THAN THEN DRIVE AWAY

There’s nothing funnier than showing some dumb bitch who’s boss. You are truly a real man. That woman’s low self-esteem and willingness to fuck you have rightly earned her public humiliation and financial destitution. Can someone say hot? Go, you!

SHE HAS NO GAG REFLEX, AND SHE LIKES IT ROUGH

Your date’s day job at the zucchini-swallowing factory has allowed her to develop some remarkable sexual traits. You guessed it: she likes being forcibly held still during sex. That gagging noise is her way of saying “you are the finest lover I have ever known.” If only her lecturer friend Casey weren’t at that national banana-squatting convocation all week.

NO MATTER WHAT KIND OF WEIRD SHIT YOU'RE INTO, CHANCES ARE SHE'S INTO IT TOO

Some do diapers, some do animal costumes, some do feet, some do chocolate sauce. You do all of the above. No need to be embarrassed, son; unless you’ve hooked up with a total prude, your odds are damn good of getting all you want and more out of your date. In fact, according to a national survey of characters appearing in Internet pornography, there’s a ten percent chance that if you check the trunk of her car you’ll find one or more of the following items: butt plugs, a big black dildo, the collected pubic hair of three years of waxing, lead body paint, stranglin’ belts, jumper cables.

IF NEEDED, A CONDOM WILL SIMPLY APPEAR ON YOUR PENIS DURING A CROSS-FADE

Forget to pick up some rubbers for the date? Chill out, bro; the editor’s got your back. Just keep prodding her upturned bottom with your man-stick, eventually the condom will appear. If not, take it as a good sign that she’s either barren or you’ve had a vasectomy during one of the numerous star wipes.

WHEN EJACULATING, IT IS CONSIDERED GENTLEMANLY TO AVOID THE EYES

One of the few times a woman will openly show her distaste is during the money shot. Wincing is an ancient and respected method of accepting a man’s seed into the natural receptacles (the mouth, nostrils, and cheek area). But aiming for the eyes is simply barbaric, a practice dating back to the 19th century, when it was largely believed that an unblinded woman witnessing a man’s orgasm would be insatiably driven to devour the penis. This is most likely a scientific impossibility, as any woman’s stomach would be far too small to accommodate the filet mignon-like flesh of your now enormous unit.

IT WILL FEEL AWESOME

Seriously, go for it. It won’t end with you crying at all. On the contrary, you’ll want to do it again right away, and have absolutely no urge to avoid your partner for the rest of Junior High.


Last edited by sta-kool : 07-13-2011 at .

Originally Posted by Para-Goomba

You join an internet forum devoted to enlarging your penis.

Nobody is allowed to post anything else, this shit ended it.

I’m laughing so hard right now omg, this is the be all, end all comment for the thread


Start:7.5 BPEL X 5 MSEG

Goal: 7 MSEG

Heere We GOOooh!

When…you think lady-boys are just a perfectly normal diversion from your normal porn watching. :eek:


Heat makes the difference between gaining quickly or slowly for some guys, or between gaining slowly instead of not at all for others. And the ideal penis size is 7.6" BPEL x 5.6" Mid Girth.

Basics.... firegoat roll How to use the Search button for best results

Originally Posted by Tossed Salad
You know you’ve been brainwashed by porn when..

You actually believe what’s written in this thread.

LOL seriously.


Starting/Present: 7.0 NBPEL x 5.5 EG

4/1/07 - 7.0 NBPEL x 5.7 EG - Pic: Chief dantes pics

Settle For: 8.5 NPEL x 6.5 EG

Too fucking funny guys.
Para-goomba and sta-kool topped it all. Kudos you two.

Firegoat, I hear you! My man I’ve seen some of them little asian LBs I would not be hardly able to tell they were not women.


12/10, Bpel-7", Mseg-6", Beg-6.3"

07/11, Bpel-7.85, Mseg-6.5", Beg-6.9" My routine and pics here

Originally Posted by iGrow
You get arrested by a female officer after she pulls you over and you try to turn it into the next best scene.

You know that female officer is ITCHING for it.

You know your brainwashed by porn when you have a legitimate 8x6 stick and you still think it’s small.

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