Seeing Other Dicks with My FWB

Hi guys

So I went on a Cam site while with my FWB girl today. We play around on Cam anonymously and watch other people watching us (all consensual of course!). It’s a website like Chatroulette.

So we did this for the first time today and I found myself getting agitated when I saw dicks bigger than mine!
So the basic rundown is she (let’s call her Ally) knows I do PE, and already really like my dick. She’s called it a great size for her and says it’s really handsome and really likes what I’m able to do with it. All very genuine compliments. Size wise I’m 6.9” BPEL and last time I measure led I was 5” mseg; so a decent size, although I would love to get to like 7.5-8”x5.5”. I started at 6.5” bpel and 4.5” mseg. So there’s been progress and a huge shoutout to PE and all of our helpful PE family!

So back to the Cam; we saw a ton of dicks and guys watching us and I found myself getting a little upset inside because it seemed like there were a lot of decently sized cocks! If the average is supposed to be around 5-5.5”, it seemed as though that’s not accurate as most of the dicks were a good size in length and all decent girth. We only saw like 2 small dicks out of I’d say 30 or so!

I found myself getting discouraged as I don’t feel like I’m technically above average now. I feel like there were a lot of long ones. Ally asked their sizes and of course some guys were clearly lying and we talked about that together. But I got a little miffed at the guy that said between 8-9” and I was like eh I don’t know and Ally was like rah he was pretty big! I said oh see I think you do like really big ones but she said no I think that’s too long. She’s had a (in her words, and possibly the typical girl overestimation) 9” bc in the past so that’s always in my head. She insists it was too big and mine is perfect however my ego always tells me it’s too small.

And today seeing a bunch of guys who were at least my size and who mostly seemed to have bigger girth made me feel sad. It made me feel like my PE journey has helped but I’m still behind a lot of guys.

She has had a very small dicked guy in the past so that’s good I guess as I know I’m. It the smallest. But again my ego is always telling me I should be like at least 7.5” to LOOK big. I do stretching and have been getting back to jelquing in addition to pumping which I added in November. I just feel inadequate and definitely felt my ego get upset and jealous when she saw some of the dicks and said, oh that’s a nice one. We are FWB so she has every right to her opinion and I wouldn’t ever discourage that as I don’t want a commitment and don’t have strong feelings or anything. So it’s purely ego. And again she told me she really likes mine.

I probably sound like a whiny bitch, and I’m sorry for that. I just wanted to get your opinions on this guys. Has seeing these guys’ dicks on Cam today actually shown me the true average of cock size, and that it’s bigger than the studies say? Should I feel inadequate? And why do I?

Thanks for any feedback as I’m feeing down.

-Kurt

I’m extremely self conscious, so there is no way I would do something like that. Sounds like you should have avoided it as well. Just makes you more self conscious. I find myself analyzing things like that and it depresses me. I want the baseball shaped 9incher, but I have more of a cone 7incher. Then I realize I’ll always hate my penis and 1 day my penis will stop working all together and that realization depresses me more.

This is kinda funny, but my fwb (had to google meaning) made me feel uncomfortable after she described an ex boyfriend of having a big dick. I got upset when she couldn’t tell me if I was longer than him. She told me I was a while back, now she says she doesn’t know. That annoys the hell out of me. I did win on girth for whats thats worth.

You gotta remember, most of those guys on that site are highly comfortable with themselves due to their larger size. There will be much less average sized guys then above average guys on that site, that’s for damn sure.

Second that. The only reason they show themselves on a site like that is for the ‘shock’ value of having a big dick.

Now that I’m slowly nearing my 8 inch mark I might consider it myself. Before that, no way in hell.

Society gives no love towards smaller sized men, they’re rather shamed if it’s the right type of human seeing it. It’s pretty fucked up as we don’t shame smaller breasted women but some women have no shame in shaming smaller men.

Maybe I’m a bit cynical though, but also talking from experience.

I agree with Makehergocrazy, that on such web-cam sites sits men who mostly “conquer” women with their sizes and some type of “alpha masculinity”, which Vin Diesel and Dwayne Johnson boasts :/ Let’s say - their only way to get some pussies xDD

I had in mind to try something similar, but not really interested so much. I mean there is always someone bigger, BUT - through your puberty period you should have learned by heart how women attracted to character of men, some manners, sometimes may be similarity with her father in way of communicating.

So, we all here encouraged to do PE, to grow big and so on, BUT AGAIN - it is for sex improvements! Not for conquering woman’s attention, heart, love, and so on. PE and “good” penis size just our “upgrade” to be competitive among many other men, but you by yourself must be a complete, confident person, who knows self desires. Like I would always avoid dating a girl without bachelor or better masters degree, because she would be silly for me like a rather kid, which would led to dumb interests, casual desires, zero carrier/business ideas.

Well, my opinion here - know who you are and what you want. Don’t expect to fertilize each woman, don’t expect to overcome in size each dick in world xDD

P.S. According to “style” of headline I think you are quite young Kurt, it is good, but keep in mind that age changes you and personal development along with building your human capital changes your preferences towards women. Relax and enjoy current girl, I would say))

I got sort of addicted to those sites for a few years. I try to stay away from them now.

I’m a lifelong athlete, very ripped/tan and built/muscled. And my dick looks huge on the cam - and I used to love seeing and talking to women who would fap watching me.

BUT, here’s the thing: my package is not that big. I’m only 6x5” - however, I learned how to make it look much larger than it is. There are no doubt some huge guys on those sites, and maybe it’s true that larger guys in general flock to those sites; not sure about that though, it seems to me that it’s fairly representative, once you see through how certain angles/lighting make your package look larger.

And, also key is that women don’t isolate body parts as much as we like to imagine they do, or as we have a tendency to do. They were attracted to the whole thing: my voice, my body, my package, etc.

Just like porn: you are NOT watching reality, but a fantasy. Same thing with cams.

I personally think it’s not a good idea to PE out of insecurity like that though.

Smaller guys aren’t going to flash it around on cam. Also I saw there are tricks to make your dick look huge on cam.

As others have said, sites like that attract guys with larger than average units, largely due to their confidence.

As a swinger, I’ve experienced that first hand. I’ve been to quite a few swingers events/parties/clubs. The average guy at one of those things is not “average”, and that makes sense due to the confidence factor. That’s not to say there aren’t any average or smaller than average guys but they’re definitely in the minority.

As a bisexual swinger/open relationship guy, and a bit of a slut, I think my experience is a bit insightful. Note that I’m 7.25” NBPEL & 4.7” EG.

3 out of 14 guys I’ve hooked up with on my own were bigger than me.

8 out of 25 guys I’ve been in mmf threesomes with outside of clubs/events were bigger.

14 out of 23 guys that my gf fucked and/or sucked in front of me at events/clubs were bigger than me. These guys were clothed before hooking up so its not like they were pre selected for size. These are events with anywhere from 50 to 1,000 people so you can count on a shitload of people seeing your dick in a sexual scenario.

What does that tell you ? Guys with bigger dicks are more willing to be seen in an exhibitionist setting. Its really not surprising. The people at these events are also generally of better fitness than the rest of the population which is also no surprise.

To the op, ask yourself, if you and your fwb were watching girls camming and a cam girl had a boob size that you prefer over your fwb’s, or hair color, hips, ass, whatever, would you suddenly stop wanting to be with her ? Girls do care about dick size, but not nearly as much as us guys seem to be programmed to think they do. Chemistry and how you interact in and out of the bedroom are more important. My girl is bit of a size queen but I’ve seen guys of just above average size rock her world ten times harder than some guys with massive dongs. The dick is just one tool in the tool box. Also of note, is that for bi women, there are girls who can fuck them better than some of the guys they’ve been with. Now how big exactly are those girls dicks ?

Hey man you should feel motivated to continue pursuing your PE goal when you see another dude’s dick, because independent if are smaller or bigger than yours, you should know that you were smaller once and if you continue you will be bigger, and as you said there were dudes with your size but girthier, and that is cool man look again at that man penis that will be yours when you improve your girth in the future. It is in evidence that you are doing PE to impress other people, that is why you felt sad when saw men bigger than you and good when you and your fwb saw some dudes smaller than you. I think you should change your perspective on ego, or you do what you want, I don’t know man, it is your mind and life.

Abraço.

Look up “self-selection bias.”

That is a term from research but it explains what you are seeing in the cam room.

Guys who think their dicks are big are more likely to show them off on cam. Guys who don’t think their dicks are big are not likely to show them on cam.

Some stuff on self-selection bias in Penis Size Studies that you may find interesting.

Self-selection bias
Self-selection bias - Wikipedia

In statistics, self-selection bias arises is any situation in which individuals select themselves into a group, causing a biased sample with nonprobability sampling.[citation needed] It is commonly used to describe situations where the characteristics of the people which cause them to select themselves in the group create abnormal or undesirable conditions in the group.

====

What’s the average penis size?
by Dr. Petra Boynton
http://www.mans ized.co.uk/answ … -penis-size/a15 (article no longer on the net)

Hang on a second though…

Before you reach for the tape measure, it’s worth knowing that most sex researchers and therapists don’t trust these figures.

The reason? They’re based on measurements from laboratory studies where men knew they were participating in research to see how their knobs measured up.

This means guys who were worried about size were less likely to participate, whilst guys who thought they had big schlongs were more than happy to waggle them under researchers noses.

So most researchers, therapists and doctors suspect the ‘average’ penis size figures obtained in research (and widely quoted) are at least an inch larger than they should be. This is because research on penis size is skewed in favour of men who are happy to be measured.

—————-

Same thing goes on with the cam room.

Average penis size is significantly smaller than what is reported. The simple reason is psychology. Men with average penis sizes are far less likely to swing out their dicks to a stranger and have them measure it. They feel insecure about it. If this is the case for average penis size owners, imagine what it feels like being below the commonly reported ‘average’ penis sizes. The problem exacerbates itself. An inflated average penis size will make men who have genuine average length and girth, think they are below average, hence skew the sample even further.

Other variables that also exacerbate this issue is pornography and the so-called ‘girl’ inches. Majority of girl I’ve spoken to or heard talking about penis sizes, claim that 7 inches is her ideal penis size. I really do feel sorry for them, being shamed for something they had no control over, their penis size. When the world you inhabit portrays such a false image on the ideal penis size from potential girlfriends to porn, you want something bigger. This is why I do PE, despite knowing my starting length and girth was significantly above average.

Some very insightful comments on here guys - thanks!

It’s definitely ego for me. I mean I’d like that shock and awe of a nice big thick cock; and you’re right perhaps PE will get me there eventually. I can’t focus on porn guys or Cam guys because while I think it’s great to aspire to some of their dicks (like Danny D), saying that I’m small just because I’m not them is hurtful towards myself and not the truth!

I do feel like my girth is small however. I feel like even guys who are about my size or even smaller, they are a little thicker on average. I really want a thick one. I haven’t measured in months as I took a PE break from October- December and restarted in January. Had been going from last April to September and measured 5” mseg at my peak. I don’t know if I’m any bigger since or just the same but I NEED to get bigger. It’s like a burning desired inside of me lately!

I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s best not to look at other guys. It’s always going to be guys bigger than you. Just focus on yourself and your own confidence. It’s pornstars that are barely 6.5 or 7 inches, but their costars look like they’re in love. Mainly because they confident and know how to please them.

Just read through the responses to the OP and must say there was a lot of value in reading them all. Great and insightful responses, especially from the swinger as it’s a world I’ve never had the opportunity to even enter myself, yet.

Come to think of it I would actually like to try out swinging.

You (the OP) really should check out Chaturbate then. Maybe one or two will be big-sized, but all the rest are (apparently) indicative of true dick size. It’s pretty much an eye-opener.