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Problem with confidence - more than just size

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Problem with confidence - more than just size

I feel like a sexual mess…

Before I met my gf I was sexually confident. I hadn’t been with many women but the ones I was with I got off no problem.
My gf and I initially had some good sex for a new relationship and for two relatively inexperienced people. She has/had a lot of emotional issues to go through as well as some physical issues which we agree definitely play a big roll in our sex life. I have had problems with premature ejaculation but over time I have gotten better (no marathon man here… but with PE im hoping for it). Premature ejaculation has been a problem for us and has contributed to some problems as well. I plan on fixing this to improve our sex life.

Initially I was able to go down on her and get her off. She was a tough one from the start. She admitted to me that she barely ever gets any satisfaction from masturbation when she is alone. She is learning what she likes but progress seems to be slow. As our relationship went on getting her off from going down on her became harder and harder (I am not sure why… but I have a feeling it has to do with some of her issues). It got to a point where she was never in the mood for me to go down on her because she couldn’t handle being brought right to the point of orgasming but never getting there (a problem by herself and with me). She also couldn’t handle seeing me be upset that she didn’t get to where she wanted to go. Our sexual relationship declined steadily and I felt like absolute shit. When she got frustrated she put a lot of blame on me which destroyed me. Her expressing herself while frustrated really got to me.

My gf and I have talked about it and I expressed myself to her and she completely understands and takes a lot of her difficulty to orgasm as a personal problem that she needs to figure out before we can really go to town. But still, I can’t help but feel scarred by the whole experience. I think about it every day. It has gotten to the point that I get nervous from doing anything sexual with her because I am scared of getting hurt again… scared of feeling the failure of not getting her to where she wants to be. I feel deprived as a bf not seeing her in utter ecstasy when we have sex or I go down on her.

All the mean time, my roommate with a 8.5 inch dick is fucking his gf in the room next door as I type this. She is screaming “omg your so big” among other things. I have a penis just shy of 6 inches erect… not small but not where I want it to be. If I had a healthy sexual relationship I feel like this wouldn’t really bother but because of my situation I feel like this is just the icing on the already horrible cake. On top of my issues with my gf I am starting to get personal problems thinking that my dick isn’t enough or something. I know it’s stupid but it is how I feel after all I have been through.

So everyone… what do you have to say? What is the next step? I feel like I should tell my gf how I am feeling and how sex causes anxiety for the fear of failure. We have spoken about it once before and it helped both of us work through some things. Lay it on me guys… I could use some wisdom.

let me tell you this mate

You sound very young and inexperienced at best and create excuses because you think your dick is average. There is more to sex that having a big one and not being able to use it properly. Read on all about sex and orgasms and get into your gf psychology. never mind about the guy next door you can’t help it nor you’ll ever will(that comes from the rubbing on with the Irishmen) PE at your own time and do not desperate just do it not overdoing it ( I may have at times sometimes I do get overexcited)

Learn as much as you can about newbie routines add some edging routines may be get a fleshlight to train yourself and other ways PE and keep your girl until such a time you will have a big one too

Accept your life and accept yourself. There are a lot of 3d for lasting longer.

And change rommate. Because is much easier than changing your penis.

Originally Posted by scarsick

<snip>

There are a lot of 3d for lasting longer.

<snip>

3d? I don’t understand.


For Lampwick, becoming hung like a donkey was the result of a total commitment.

A bigger dick won’t necessarily mean you will last longer. I’ve actually been feeling like everything is a lot more sensitive since starting PE. Kegels will help though, so always practice them. Additionally, a lot of what gets me off is hearing the girl I’m with, and I will say the girth work has increased that, so sometimes it’s all I can do to keep from blowing immediately, especially with a new girl. Women will say you’re big regardless, because you are. Your dick is probably a lot thicker than their fingers. You have to just talk it out with her, but make sure you’re not only focusing on broadcasting that you have a problem. The solution is to be working to fix the problem, not just knowing that it exists. You already mentioned how she didn’t like making you upset by being unable to get off, so it may be possible that constantly reminding her that something is wrong isn’t the answer, but you definitely don’t want it to be just a big awkward secret of y’alls that never gets addressed.

I would recommend a roomate change because if it bothers you that bad, but just pe more because that usually helps me.


STATS: BPEL-7.5 EG-5.6 BG-5.8 -- MT Goal reached

Goal: 8 x 5.75

My Pictures My Progress

Hey Spartan,
is your girlfriend on any anti-depressants? If yes, that is why she has difficulty coming.

If she is not, well, she still needs to sort out her own “wiring” before you can help. If she can’t come from masturbating, expecting you to work some sort of miracle is unrealistic. I notice you are Canadian? Is she a Catholic girl? I have been with a couple of them in Canada, and they can have a lot of guilt associated with sex, which makes it hard for them to relax and enjoy sex.

Whatever her issues, when she can come on her own from masturbating, then will be able to come with you more readily too. And she can tell you what she likes, and how to help her come when she understands the process herself.

Since you have been with other women and they all got off, the issue is not dick size, or your technique, it is her. But she is with you, so you need to work it out together or find a new girl.


My Before and After pics -- .5" gain...

Originally Posted by Lampwick
3d? I don’t understand.

Sorry, I mean thread.

Thanks for the clarification, scarsick.


For Lampwick, becoming hung like a donkey was the result of a total commitment.

You should be asking yourself if shes pleasing you enough. But the real problem is you placing so much importance on your performance and quality of sex. Just chill the fuck down and enjoy sex, it isnt supposed to be a goddamn competition or objective.

All of the problems and the lack of orgasm are in the mind of the girl, she is the only one to blame here. I passed trough a similar situation and it doens’t have to do anything with you nor the size of your dick.


Ahora:Longitud: 18 BP Grosor: :littleguy avanzado a los 14 EG.

Metas:Longitud: 20 BP Grosor: 15 EG.

Fotos y progresos avantasia

Originally Posted by avantasia
All of the problems and the lack of orgasm are in the mind of the girl, she is the only one to blame here. I passed trough a similar situation and it doens’t have to do anything with you nor the size of your dick.

Yes, but if he had a big dick then she would be turn on and prone to orgasm more easily. Am I wrong?

Originally Posted by scarsick
Yes, but if he had a big dick then she would be turn on and prone to orgasm more easily. Am I wrong?

Wrong, that girl that I talked about has had big dicks, a LOT bigger than mine and that didn’t contribute in the least with her ability to orgasm.

Some girls have mental blocks that cannot be breached no matter how big the dick is.


Ahora:Longitud: 18 BP Grosor: :littleguy avanzado a los 14 EG.

Metas:Longitud: 20 BP Grosor: 15 EG.

Fotos y progresos avantasia

Two words for you: vi brator.

All young men have “premature ejaculation” (whatever that is). I doubt that one woman in 20 can orgasm strictly with penetration, no matter how long you can last, polls to the contrary. Having a bigger dick won’t make her come any quicker or better; that’s all in her head. Your roommate’s girlfriend is just being a good girlfriend to help him come quicker or better, not herself.

I think your gf should see a sex therapist. Once she gets over some of her hangups and learns to get herself off, then you can concern yourself with your performance. In the meantime, it’s pointless. You’re not the problem, and nothing you do, or don’t do, sexually is going to address her underlying issues. Don’t let her bring you down with her.

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