Penis size and Jealousy

Hey guys, I’m a below average guy when it comes to penis size. My measurements are 5.1 x 4, nothing to write home about. Somehow I managed to get a hot girlfriend who doesn’t care. The one problem I have is I’m extremely jealous and it’s taking a toll on my relationship. Even though my girlfriend doesn’t care, I am still very self-conscious about my penis size. It had lead to some confidence issues on my part. Do you think this could also be a source for my jealousy?

Some people are just jealous. It is a normal emotion, but if you can’t control the way it negatively impacts your relationship, then you will lose her, and fuck up future reltationships as well. For example, if your girl goes out one night and comes home later than you expected, you probably want to yell and scream, but just control yourself and shut the fuck up.

Do you think you would act differently if you gained a couple of inches? I suspect not, especially since she seems to be happy with your dick right now, so don’t use that as an excuse.

Normal jealousy isn’t usually based on dick size. It’s an instinct, sort of a feeling that the girl is a possession of yours and you aren’t willing to share her with anybody. Everybody has it. If you are worried that she might encounter bigger dicks, it’s not jealousy but an insecurity. If this is the case then you are insecure and not jealous.

I was actually thinking of started a semi-related thread about dealing with negative feelings like that (and others) related to penis size. I think I still will later. That being said, mravg’s advice is solid it probably speaks to other, more general issues. As well, if your girl is good to you, then don’t give her shit because of your own insecurities. It only poisons your relationship, and sometimes it becomes self-fulfilling. Acting like a jealous prick tends to alienate, hurt and/or anger people.

You may find your jealousy declines a bit as you get more secure in the relationship (if it lasts and strengthens, that is). Other men will seem less of a threat the more certain you are that your woman really digs you. Dick-size insecurities may play a small role in your jealousy, but in general I agree with Mravg that this is something largely “pre-set” for different people and hard to change by modifying one isolated component of who you are (same goes for confidence: so many guys here think that if only they had a big fat cock, they’d suddenly have big fat balls around women).

If you’ve managed to get a hot girlfriend who doesn’t care about your penis size, then why ruin the relationship with insecurities and jealousy? She’s with you and staying with you for a reason. Control your jealousy. If you keep up with PE you will grow, but it’s not going to solve your jealousy issue. Enjoy your girlfriend while you have her, and don’t scare her off by being a possessive, jealous person.

I’ve met several girls who admit their boyfriends are not big but they are with them still and they would never leave him for someone who only has a big dick. It is not a deciding factor. If she stays with you, isn’t that more important? She sees something other guys cannot offer? As you’ve said she doesn’t care about your size. If this ends badly , it would likely be because of your insecurity, something most people of either gender don’t appreciate in a partner.

Alot of us put too much stock into sex equalling love. Maybe we would all be better at peace if we were more like swingers. Even they sometimes have limits though, such as no kissing, no sex without partner’s knowledge, and no attempt at forming a loving relationship with others for example.

It sounds like you have attracted one of the rare ones who appreciate you for you! Don’t ruin a good thing by pushing her away with your crazy jealousy. If it wasn’t your penis, you would be obsessing that some other guy has more money or is taller or is more worldly or funnier, etc. She obviously likes you for just who you are. I doubt that she likes your jealousy, however.

The reverse usually happens. A guy loves the way a woman looks and tells her so. She thinks she is fat and when you say she looks good, she thinks you are lying and there is no way to win. She eventually pushes the guy away because of her own insecurities because she feels not good enough. It sounds like you’re doing this type of thing.

You can re-program your subconscious to enjoy your good fortune instead of screwing it up, through affirmations. “I deserve to have a great girlfriend.” Or something like that. These things really do work.

I think lots of us have insecurities about this, especially those of us with hot GFs. We feel that we need to equal, or honor their hotness by having big dicks, and since we don’t, we get depressed (and do PE). I’ll tell you though, your confidence will come from your ability to pleasure your girl. And in this regard size isn’t that important. Learn how to give great oral and be attentive to what makes her feel good and you win. Also make sure other aspects of your life (work, school, money) aren’t also part of what’s making you feel inadequate.

Good luck - you can get past this!

By the way, my girlfriend has had some monster cocks in her day - one guy was over 10” she said. Yet she’s with ME, and tells me in no uncertain terms that I’m perfect for her. Rarely will she not have at least one orgasm with me, and I’m far from big! It’s about endurance and selflessness.

Wow, you guys have impressed me with some great answers. Thanks for the advice, some of you guys must be deep thinkers.

I’m average sized and I am very jealous. I believe that my jealously manifests itself in sexual insecurity but is rooted in a lack of self-confidence in many other aspects of my life. I don’t believe I’m a very good father. I don’t believe I’m good at my job. My wife recently became the primary wage earner in our family. All of those things make any insecurities I have about sex SOOOO much more pronounced.

north:

I’m sorry to hear this. Ask yourself if the other areas of your life would automatically imrpove if penis size was not a worry. My guess is the answer lies in taking steps to improve what you can control. By and large, we all know we can’t control our dick size. Sure, we can gain an inch or so with LOTS of time and work put in, but basically we’re stuck with what God gave us. If we examine the other areas of our life and take steps to improve them, then we compartmentalize and are thus less likely to group in the size issue with other, more important issues. Then, as I’ve learned, we appreciate what we DO have because life’s too short and too important to obsess over this stuff. We’re all here because we want to better ourselves and our penile health and probably even our self-esteem to a point. But who says life gets easier with an extra inch or two?

Good luck with everything.

- faux

Sounds about right to me, if you caught your gf stroking some other guys monster wang then you’d have reason to be jealous. What’s more commonly the case is an irrational jealously. Dont fear or get angry at other blokes (or your gf by proxy), its not about anyone but you and her. This jealously thing is a way of projecting your fears outside of the relationship where you can fight them but it doesnt work. What works is improving your relationship and getting a better understanding and communcation with your partner.

If the jealousy is irrational then being brave and facing upto it any way you can, will sooner or later reduce these feelings I think.

This is my take on it anyway, good luck

Jelousy is a anormal emotion, no matter how annoying people may find it.

It’s very likely that if/when you have a larger than average penis, then you’ll still be jelous of other things, trust me. Mine’s larger than average yet I’m jelous of almost everyone I see, it’s getting very near ridiculous.

Remember, most of the time it’s going to be in your pants, away from eyes. Once you’re confident with your girlfriend and you know she really is with you and wants no one else then you don’t have to worry. The one person who matters doesn’t care about it’s size, and everyone else can’t actually see it.