MY dick just vanished.

Don’t worry about it. With President Obama running around the world trying to increase foreign relations and diplomacy, I’m sure soon the Russians will allow you to have back the 3 inches the Kremlin caused to vanish. But make sure you watch out for sputnik. I hear it’s back in orbit.

Or loosing those 3 inches will teach you to never apologize to anyone again.

Maybe you were pushing too hard when you first measured?

Maybe you decided to get honest about your *real* length ;)

I must apologize danman to all our so-called friends who have mocked and sneered you and your dilemma.

Clearly you need serious help but before we get onto that, why do you call your dick Unexplainable? (and please remember to capitalize next time).

I think Serge, Geroge, and Alex U. had something to do with the name. I’m not quite sure, still trying to figure out this enigma. However, ‘Unexplainable’ makes sense when you think about it.

Okay?

Meh, very funny. I’m just a little mental, Glad to bring good news. I’m back to where I was before I shrank, and beyond, in girth. I hit 1.75 inches across. I used to be 5.0 EG .I wonder.

I think is has to do with orgone energy, and confidence Auras mostly. Placing yourself in positions below other, for example when aplogizing, like I did, could have an effect on ones penis length. Realyl, it’s a terrible problem, but I’ve removed all the cancer from my life now.
However I did get robbed and punched in the face yesterday, and the same “shrinking occured” but to a much much lighter degree, I have it back already and even more.

Funny thing is, they punched me in the face while I was holding their car door open, and it was an SUV so I held on to the door and stood on the foot platform as they drove off, and took a spin with them just long enough to tell them that they hit like women. I’ve been hit harder on accident, honestly.

But yeah, any insight on to why my johnson could literally dissappear in a matter of minutes, semi permanently?

The Russians are coming? Already? And I live just around the corner :(

My penis shrank once before when I felt threatened, like I had the feeling of adrenaline. Is this what your talking about?

I think it’s a natural reaction, for example if your going to fight, the body shrinks your penis to protect it from injury.

When my dick dissappears for awhile, I spank it until it listens to me. I beat the shit outta it for two days then leave it alone for one day, this generally leaves it to sore and to weak to go anywhere. Sometimes I burn my piecer till it does my bidding. Don’t let your dick disappear, you tell that young punk who is boss and you discipline it and it will grow up and act like a proper adult.

Scream at it if it tries to hide from you, that works for me.

Perhaps too much time spent staring up at Uranus?

Руска́ Рома́ , ведьма ? Something like that? If it is like that then you really had no choice and damn well better apologize right away.

It is best to not end up in a situation where you need to apologize. Don’t f*ck up. :shrug: Even if your friend is a nice guy and you apologized because it is right thing to do it could still mess with your mind.Was apologizing hard for you to do? Was it very emotionally charged? Read what Phoenix wrote below.

It sounds as though apologizing to the Russian was harder for you that getting robbed. Probably because they hit like a girl and you got a chance to laughed at them. In your mind apologizing was worse than getting robbed so it affected you more.

I think when you get way stressed out your body suck all of the blood out of your johnson. I think you are OK. If you have insurance it would still be good to go to the doctor just for a check up.

Good point