Losing hardness in erections

Dear folks,

I’m a 23 year old guy who works out 3 times a week in a gym. I drink alcohol once a week. I don’t smoke, I don’t do drugs. I try to eat healthy although I don’t eat enough vegetables and fruits which I’m trying to change now.

I started PE like half a year ago but went on and off. I started out with the newbie routine. Around that time I noticed (perhaps it started earlier already but this is the time that I remember noticing it first) that my dick didn’t become as hard as it used to. I don’t know if PE was to blame or not, I doubt it to be honest, but one can’t be sure. When masturbating it sinks in when I’m not jerking off and when I’m having sex it also sinks in when it’s not busy doing thé movement. For example last weekend I had a one night stand with an ex colleague of mine (with condom, I’ve had the same without condom and even masturbating so I don’t think the condom is solely to blame) and she had to jerk it every time I took it out before it would get hard enough to penetrate again. I stopped doing PE completely a few weeks back, I also refrained from watching porn completely thinking that might have something to do with it. I masturbate approximately once a day.

I tried to cover everything that could be the cause, I will start eating more vegetables and fruit now and start to do cardio 5 days a week, but perhaps there’s someone out there that had the same problem and solved it.

I would love to hear some experiences and input.

There’s a catch 22 when it comes to PE that’s very subtle and can affect your erection quality while having sex. PE obviously causes one to pay closer attention to their penis. While this is a good thing for many reasons, it can disrupt your arousal and distract your mind from what it would normally be focused on during sex. I read a quote from an article that basically said, “During sex, if you’re thinking about getting an erection and focused on the performance of your penis, you’re already on your way to not achieving an erection or losing your erection.”

Sex is about arousal, not performance. Your mind should naturally be focused on the beautiful female in front of you and the incredible feeling of her pussy, not on whether your penis will perform properly or whether you’ll be able to satisfy her. A woman wants to be pleased, of course, but they also want to know you are very turned on by her and that her body can drive you wild. This drives a woman crazy. Just think, as men we love to see a woman in obvious pleasure while fucking her. Don’t you think they feel the same way? Of course they do.

You don’t hear of cases of erectile dysfunction in the animal kingdom. That is because they act on instinct, and their brains aren’t developed to the point where they can “think” themselves out of arousal.

The brain is a powerful and tricky tool, and when it comes to sex it’s easy for our thought patterns to get out of whack. I hope this helps you out a little.

Maybe this can help demonstrate what I’m talking about:

Think about a hot woman and how good it feels to fuck her. Now how long does your mind stay focused on that thought? Do you find yourself being easily distracted from that thought? If so, then every time your brain switches to something other that the pure pleasure of fucking a beautiful woman, your brain is sending signals to your penis that an erection is not necessary. That is why performance-based thoughts will absolutely kill an erection.

Thanks for your comments but I’m not too sure it’s all mental, I’m having the same thing when masturbating namely thus I discarded the possibility of the problem being a psychological issue already.

Another example, I used to be able to get a hard on when thinking about having sex but nowadays even watching porn mostly won’t get it up. I have to touch it to get an erection.

For the record I will try it, thanks pefanatic!

Hey buddy. I think I had the same problem a while ago.. Here’s the recipe. You should stay away from porn like for at least a month, and I’m serious , no porn. Also you should stop masturbating for at least a week, this means 7 days no touching of your penis, no stroking, etc.. You have to bring back the feeling, you know what I mean ? With some guys (like me for example) there is a period of how should I say.. Depletion. You think you are allright, but you slowly start to loose erection, you can’t get it up without jerking it or touching it.. I’ve experienced this same thing and staying away from porn and masturbation for some time helped me. You can try also getting food additives. They are usually pills with herbal extracts in them. There are a lot of them our there, I can’t give you a brand but I from time to time take ones that have L-Arginine , Yohimbe, Ginseng , etc. They aren’t like Viagra or something, you take them daily with your meal.

It probably either too much masturbation, too much PE or a combination of both. Too much PE will decrease your EQ, and way too much will completely crash it. The proper amount of PE will greatly increase it, almost like Cialis. One of the ways you can tell that you are getting your PE dialed in properly, is you will have much improved EQ.

That sounds just like my problem indeed. I’ll do as you say, but another question how did you fit PE in this? Did you wait for your erection to become like it was again before starting any kind of workout?

By the way those pills are mainly used for the improvement of perfusion right? If so I’ll start looking for them as well.

Thanks for your comment!

Hi sparkyx, I’ve read your post on EQ several months before even starting this thread hence me stopping PE completely when I got sick and tired of not being able to ‘perform’ as I used to. So according to the article I should stop PE completely till my EQ is what it was again? No kegels nothing?

Thanks for your comment!

Hey Dave. Well I wasn’t doing any PE at that time. I just stopped for a certain period of time to watch porn and masturbate.

As for the pills, they improved my erection a lot, actually they helped me gain it back, and also helped me last longer. BUT I think you should talk to your doctor about this, if you have for example high blood pressure or kidney problems, you should take it slow. You can buy them anywhere without prescription, they aren’t even medicine, just food additives, but you have to be careful.

Kegel exercises aren’t helping as well?

In general, kegels are good…but you can overdo them also and drop EQ. If you want to kegel, keep it reasonable.

Two weeks off should be fine, then if you restart PE, cut your workout in half or more. Shoot of improving EQ first with your PE, so start low and slowly increase as you watch your EQ. Great EQ and gains usually go together.