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Jungle's Formal Introduction

Originally Posted by Jungle112
Ok well honestly, I want to walk away because of numerous things. Had to ask her to stop talking to and have anyway to contact the dude that she cheated on me wit. I see guys she fucked all over campus and two had the nerve to say hi to me and her. I feel like she treated them better then she does me. They got crazy sex and she cheated in a car (one of my fantasies.with out the cheating) it’s just crazy. I feel like being a Man of respect I show it and get poop’d on for it. I feel like if you are with Jungle, then your ex’s need to go in another direction. She also lied about her best friend who is a guy who she said at first was a kiss, then it was touching(he touched her she says), then it was a 2 week thing. All while she was not with me.but it was a lie non the less. He even had the nerve to ask her to spring break.WHAT THE FLY $%#$ and Vegas for his birthday. At that time we were engaged that has since died. This Sucia(whore) had the nerve to not bring my name up and then say I didn’t think about it. I know this it petty but a guy who had a one night stand with her was on her face book and the guy she cheated with and other various men she messed around with were there and I felt disrespected because I’m a “lion” and no other male is allowed in my territory now we apply this to real life no other guy is allowed unless it’s strictly platonic. She had a problem and she said to me a few times that I made her get rid of all her friends. This is just brief.want more

In some arguments she told me.. I have a small dick, she fucked me out of pity, I suck in bed.I tell her damn you can sure hurt a brother, she said.”you aint a brother I fucked brothers” Called me a coward. That’s why I wanna leave

I want to stay because I care and Love her.but I am falling out of love with her. It’s always something she always says I have an issue and will always have an issue. She out right told me that she thought another person was attractive.<screeeech> so the guy you cheated on was attractive and you had an attraction to him so what make s me think this is any different. It’s a professor teaches here.and she told me when we were friends that she would have sex with him and all this other stuff. She evens said to me her type is tall (check) black(no check) Dreads(no check) tattoos(no check).WTF! I am only tall out of her type then she said her type changes.really cause if that was the case why am I the non black guy you have been with.

Mr. Happy,

Your most recent post was duly noted and appreciated. However, I think with the “full story” here, I will step out of the way here in order for you to take the stage and impart your wisdom on him.


Paraphrased: It is not the critic who counts: The credit belongs to the man in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, who, at the best, knows the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.

She said she only cheated 1 time. Beast I feel you my G but it’s a hard. I do not know.she texted me she loves me it’s just hard with the love and the hate.


Last edited by Jungle112 : 02-11-2009 at .

There’s a lot going on here, Jungle112.

I’ll take it bit by bit.

I want to point out that I asked for pros and cons and you gave me 90% cons. That says something. You are unhappy.

That alone justifies moving on, no questions asked.

Originally Posted by Jungle112
Ok well honestly, I want to walk away because of numerous things.

Had to ask her to stop talking to and have anyway to contact the dude that she cheated on me wit.

I see guys she fucked all over campus and two had the nerve to say hi to me and her. I feel like she treated them better then she does me. They got crazy sex and she cheated in a car (one of my fantasies with out the cheating) it’s just crazy.

I feel like being a Man of respect I show it and get poop’d on for it. I feel like if you are with Jungle, then your ex’s need to go in another direction.

She also lied about her best friend who is a guy who she said at first was a kiss, then it was touching(he touched her she says), then it was a 2 week thing. All while she was not with me, but it was a lie non the less. He even had the nerve to ask her to spring break.WHAT THE FLY $%#$ and Vegas for his birthday. At that time we were engaged that has since died. This Sucia(whore) had the nerve to not bring my name up and then say I didn’t think about it.

I know this it petty but a guy who had a one night stand with her was on her face book and the guy she cheated with and other various men she messed around with were there and I felt disrespected because I’m a “lion” and no other male is allowed in my territory now we apply this to real life no other guy is allowed unless it’s strictly platonic. She had a problem and she said to me a few times that I made her get rid of all her friends.


Even given this stuff, I think some of your problems here are of your own creation. So I’ll offer my ideas for your consideration for your future relationships.

In your adult life you are going to meet women who are sexually experienced. It is unrealistic for you to demand they sever all ties with their ex-s (or remove them all from their facebook pages). That’s just jealousy and it will get in your way of forming a strong bond with anyone. You must think on this and confront the guy in the mirror.

You think dating is tough now, see how far that shit gets you later in life. People have connections, and those connections are part of who they are; it’s none of your business and you can’t control it, so don’t bother.

Let me be clear, she’s guilty of some bad behavior too, but that part’s nothing you can control. The sooner you get clear on that the happier you’ll be in future relationships.

Now, I’m not saying that means that you shouldn’t have limits on what you want from them, and inappropriate contact is a whole other story. You need to be able to trust, and having clear-cut boundaries is very important.

However, your boundaries, at the outset, seem a bit on the narrow side. No worries, it’s not unusual. You remind me of me when I was young. Therefore, I’d say this relationship is for you to learn about yourself mostly.

Let’s take the example of the best friend, of whom she at first said nothing happened, then admitted a kiss, then some touching… all these stages of admission had to do with you. What you’d think of her. Because she knew you’d be upset. The other side of this is: she told you. So on some level she may well have wanted to be honest up front, but knew she was dealing with “a lion.” In a way you may have set her up to lie to you.

I’m not saying what she did was right, let me be clear, but she may have felt caught between a rock and a hard place.

Think about this: she lied so you wouldn’t leave her. That means she wanted you. Which brings us to this:

Originally Posted by Jungle112
In some arguments she told me.. I have a small dick, she fucked me out of pity, I suck in bed.I tell her damn you can sure hurt a brother, she said.”you aint a brother I fucked brothers” Called me a coward. That’s why I wanna leave


Things people say out of anger are not always true. Often they are not.

I’d say that’s definitely true here; she said that stuff because she was upset and angry and knew it would hurt.

Originally Posted by Jungle112
I want to stay because I care and Love her, but I am falling out of love with her. It’s always something she always says I have an issue and will always have an issue.


Your English fell apart in the last sentence, so I don’t really know what you mean.

But the first sentence is clear enough. Ask yourself this: Why?

Why do you love her? What do you mean by that? You pissed and moaned about what hurt you and made you angry.

So what’s so good about her? There must be something.

Originally Posted by Jungle112
She out right told me that she thought another person was attractive.<screeeech> so the guy you cheated on was attractive and you had an attraction to him so what make s me think this is any different. It’s a professor teaches here and she told me when we were friends that she would have sex with him and all this other stuff.

In a general sense, there’s nothing wrong with her acknowledging that another person is attractive. Everyday we walk by people, strangers maybe even friends and we think, “Hmmm… I wonder what that would be like.”

Welcome to the human race.

With regard to the cheating, I would assume it was true if she went the distance to cheat with him. Obviously she thought he was attractive on some level. It would be pretty weird if she didn’t think he was attractive. Am I wrong?

What bothers me about her part of this is that it’s pretty insensitive, given the effect cheating has had on you. Now I don’t know how you got this part from her. Was it after the fight? Or during? That makes a difference. During means it’s just more of the same: button pushing.

If it was after, like I said: insensitive and a bit selfish. It’s a strike against her, but there’s a silver lining: she obviously feels like she can trust you. That’s important to consider.

Originally Posted by Jungle112
She evens said to me her type is tall (check) black(no check) Dreads(no check) tattoos(no check). WTF! I am only tall out of her type then she said her type changes really cause if that was the case why am I the non black guy you have been with.


Hmm…

then she said her type changes

That’s the most true thing she said, in that circumstance. I’ll tell you why, she’s really testing the waters of her sexuality, and compatibility, not to mention her sexual power and influence, and what she wants out of life. All normal things for a young person to be going through.

I would wager she doesn’t know what she wants.

I would also say that you should leave her.

But for a different reason than my colleagues here might suggest: it’s because you appear to need a different level of commitment than she is capable of giving right now.

You don’t want to be her back-up boyfriend, a safe haven she can rely on as she tests the waters. That won’t be good for your head.

So that’s my take so far.

How is she with you these days? Anything good to report? Or do you feel like trust is completely broken?


Before: I'd like to show you something I'm very proud of, but you'll have to move real close.

After: I\'d like to show you something I\'m very proud of, but you guys in the front row will have to stand back.

God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time. - Robin Williams (:


Last edited by Mr. Happy : 02-11-2009 at .

Originally Posted by Mr. Happy
In your adult life you are going to meet women who are sexually experienced. It is unrealistic for you to demand they sever all ties with their ex-s (or remove them all from their facebook pages). That’s just jealousy and it will get in your way of forming a strong bond with anyone. You must think on this and confront the guy in the mirror.

I’m taken back because.well yes.severe the bond. They are no longer your friend.the line has been crossed. No coming back from that. The stuff with her best friend she told the kiss when we were friends. Sexual experience is different then being a sleez. You cannot tell me that any amount of sexual experience or anything justifies letting those dudes get what they want and me getting poop’d on. Gotta head to class will post more later thank you all very much for input so far.

Am I being insecure or do I have the “right” to feel this way? The good.she listens most of the time, helped me stop doing most of the dumb stuff I used to do. She made a few drawings and such for me.but I feel I could get all that and more with out the sleez from another chick. You do not disrespect someone you love. I’m kinda un happy bout the sex toy raffle here at school because I feel like I’m being replaced.

These days there is still hate for her. I still do not trust her. She starts these little arguments and such.More when I get back.


Last edited by Mr. Happy : 02-11-2009 at . Reason: fixed quotes

My man stop this madness and just stop talking to the girl, shes bringing you down more then shes giving you love, shes fucking other dudes and rubbing it in your face and the way you describe her I can almost gaurantee that it has been more then once. You got a 8x6 homie, put it to good use instead of using it on some unappreciating ass skeet (sorry but the way she treats you she is) that thinks its small. You need to dump her and just NEVER talk to her again so the feelings of wanting to be together dont come back, be a man stand up for yourself and let the chick go, you will find another girl gauranteed. Dont get back with her after you break up either, the best advice I can give you is you really need to move on, hit the strip club man itll boost your ego and help you forget, make sure your wasted too if your 21.

If I were you, I would make a well thought out action plan to implement slowly over the course of the next 4 weeks that will convert this girl from girlfriend to easy booty call. She’s a prime candidate. The other guys she’s dated recognize that. And they aren’t freakin out over YOU. So why should you freak out over THEM? If you can’t beat em, join em. Meanwhile, you just might find the right girl for you in the process.

Ever wonder why a playa gets lots of booty? It’s cause he gets lots of booty. You’ve got to build your client list.

Ah, to be 20 again.

(I’m not trying to make it worse—-if it is love, ignore me)


Begin 12-28-08: BPEL:5.8 EG:4.75

Current 2-08-09: BPEL:6.0 EG:4.90

1st Goal_____: BPEL:7.0 EG:5.50

Nothing wrong with pre-gaming it Beast!

Originally Posted by Jungle112
I’m taken back because.well yes.severe the bond. They are no longer your friend.the line has been crossed. No coming back from that. The stuff with her best friend she told the kiss when we were friends.

Sexual experience is different then being a sleez. You cannot tell me that any amount of sexual experience or anything justifies letting those dudes get what they want and me getting poop’d on. Gotta head to class will post more later thank you all very much for input so far.


Poop’d?

You are not wholly understanding my point. If she’s having a relationship with you, then she (or anyone) needs to be clear about what she’s doing and what her commitments are.

Originally Posted by Jungle112
Am I being insecure or do I have the “right” to feel this way?


If you expect an ex to completely disappear from her life because she’s now with you, yes, that’s insecurity. It’s possible to break up with someone and remain friends. If you ask anyone to give up a friend just because of you, you’re asking a lot - too much, in fact.

If the ex (or ex’s) in question is flirting and hoping for another shot in the sack with her, you have a legitimate beef.

The divide has to do with her behavior and her demonstrated respect (or disrespect) of you.

Originally Posted by Jungle112
The good:

She listens most of the time, helped me stop doing most of the dumb stuff I used to do. She made a few drawings and such for me, but I feel I could get all that and more with out the sleez from another chick. You do not disrespect someone you love.


You start to talk about the good and then go right back into what sucks. You notice that?

You’re pissed off at her.

Originally Posted by Jungle112
I’m kinda un happy bout the sex toy raffle here at school because I feel like I’m being replaced.


Nonsense. That’s just girls having girl fun.

Nothing to do with you. If things were good between you, you could use it on her and it would only add to your sex-life.

Women rarely buy toys to replace anyone.

Originally Posted by Jungle112
IThese days there is still hate for her. I still do not trust her. She starts these little arguments and such.More when I get back.


Get out now.


Before: I'd like to show you something I'm very proud of, but you'll have to move real close.

After: I\'d like to show you something I\'m very proud of, but you guys in the front row will have to stand back.

God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time. - Robin Williams (:

Originally Posted by tallheart
If I were you, I would make a well thought out action plan to implement slowly over the course of the next 4 weeks that will convert this girl from girlfriend to easy booty call. She’s a prime candidate. The other guys she’s dated recognize that. And they aren’t freakin out over YOU. So why should you freak out over THEM? If you can’t beat em, join em. Meanwhile, you just might find the right girl for you in the process.

On this same note; have the “talk”. You know, “let’s be friends with benefits”. It’s not anger, frustration, neediness or desperation. It is simply, “I think it’s time that I play the field”. (kind of like she is right now)
That puts you in a position of power in this thing. If she crys and begs, stick it to her and stick to your guns. If she says “fine”, and walks out, you’ve cleared up a lot of grief in your life pretty quickly.

Remember, as Happy was saying, in so many words, young people do young people stuff. Everyone is learning about life, love, relationships etc. Start having fun man. You’ll probably get more tail than you think.


Paraphrased: It is not the critic who counts: The credit belongs to the man in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, who, at the best, knows the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.

Originally Posted by jungle
Sexual experience is different then being a sleez. You cannot tell me that any amount of sexual experience or anything justifies letting those dudes get what they want and me getting poop’d on. Gotta head to class will post more later thank you all very much for input so far.

I always found being pooped on the number one reason to get out of a relationship ;)

Mr. Happy.It’s confusing but yes I go to the bad because it’s outweighs the good. I think that ex’s cannot be friends.they can be neutral till they want something. Time and time again it is proven. I will ask her to drop a friend it’s not a lot if you love someone especially if you guys were involved then it shouldn’t be anything to drop them. I do not want to be disrespectful and dog her out (booty call) and young people stuff is an excuse I think.

As far as the sex toy thing I feel threatened no clue as to why maybe because I feel we don’t fuck enough and this will just make it less.

Jungle,

I’m not necessarily suggesting to “get back at her”. I am suggesting to get rid of her. She is occupying minds of your mind’s time and effort I bet. There are so many out there man. Trust me. (it’s true)


Paraphrased: It is not the critic who counts: The credit belongs to the man in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, who, at the best, knows the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.

I will take your word for it. Some how I feel this is some how my fault which from what I understand is. Am I being irrational with my expectations?

Originally Posted by Jungle112
I will take your word for it. Some how I feel this is some how my fault which from what I understand is. Am I being irrational with my expectations?

Look, it takes two to make a relationship work, ok? A girl doesn’t cheat when, or because she’s happy. (not necessarily with you, but herself) Are you a part of the relationship? Yes. Unless you have been verbally or physically abusive to her during the relationship, this is not your fault. (everyone argues, by the way, so that usually doesn’t count for being verbally abusive)

Quit blaming yourself for all of this. It appears to be a bad relationship, plain and simple.

Get on with it. Do you have a wedding date? Is she carrying your child? If the answer is “no”,..


Paraphrased: It is not the critic who counts: The credit belongs to the man in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, who, at the best, knows the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.

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