pob, I have just read your opening post. Let me put your mind to rest on a few things.
1. The variation in size of your testicles is within the totally normal range. Very few men have testicles the same size, and considerable variation is normal and no cause for concern at all.
2. The size of your ‘smaller’ testicle is average/a bit above average, and the larger one is at the very top end of normal.
3. Your penis is considerably above average in erect size.
4. Your flaccid size is large-average. Plenty of guys here would be very happy indeed to have it.
5. Varicoceles are remarkably common. I have had one for 30 years. They do not have any effect on the development of the size of your penis or your testicles. Removing them should only be done if absolutely necessary. Removing a varicocele will not subsequently cause either growth of your penis or testicles.
So to summarise:
Your testicles are completely normal, and larger than average.
Your penis is larger than average in both length and girth, both in its flaccid and erect states.
Your varicocele is not responsible for anything, there is no need to get it removed, and removing it would have no effect.
You are completely normal in the penis and testicle department apart from having a very small and insignificant varicocele, and being at the top end of normal for penis and testicle sizes.
You have nothing, nothing at all, to worry about when it comes to your sexual equipment. You can be proud of it, show it off, use it and be confident.
My expertise is not psychiatry although I do have a fair knowledge as I talk to patients about their full medical histories. You do need to see a psychiatric specialist and get on top of your other problems. But you certainly don’t need to worry about your genitals. They are normal.