Going soft

Hey guys,

So I’ve been dabbling with PE for a while now, but have never really stuck with a long-term routine - I have a problem that’s kinda become more important to me than size -
I’ve gotten better and better through the years at lasting a long time, but now it’s almost as if I last too long for my own good because I’ll go soft before I can ejaculate. I’ll be rock hard for the first 10-15 minutes, then it’ll slowly soften up to where I can’t do anything. So, lately, it’s become a choice: either go at it full-throttle and last maybe 10 minutes before I blow, or last for like 30 min to an hour and go soft before I can finish. She’s starting to think it’s her fault, like she’s doing something wrong. She’s hot as hell, and I’m totally into it, just seems like the little guy just gives up!!

What can I do to last that long but still be able to stay hard and get off? I don’t want to take any pills. If I can get bigger in the process, hey that’s great! I know kegels are good for EQ but will it help you last longer too? Any advice?

I have the same exact problem. After a while it just goes soft. Only solution I’ve found is Viagra.

Kegels help quite a bit with maintaining erection levels. Experiment with them, stamina training and you could even try edging to help you learn to keep it up for a longer time.

Another non-drug solution is a cockring. If you choose to try a cockring, go with silicone or leather as metal is inflexible and can lead to problems if you aren’t experienced.

I agree with Antistar. Kegel and maybe some jelqing.

Stamina training?

Try kegels, you can do them anywhere, they are a great help with maintaining erections.

If you use the search function located in the upper right hand of your screen and punch in ‘stamina training’ you’ll find a lot of relevant threads.

But what happens after 10 to 30 min are you no longer aroused, csledge?

In males the cooperation of the nervous system; sympaticus (ejaculation) and parasympaticus (erection) are essential for an effective sexual performance.
We just had a big lecture on the nervous system. And the professor said that in male erection/ejaculation is due to psychology no less that in 80%.

So.. You may have a medical (anatomical/physiological) issue but I rather argue that is your own mind (psych) that is the real problem.

Maybe you worry to much (and for a way too long time) and this don’t allow you to “enjoy” the act

You are like too much in to it and hurries (sympaticus) so you take off in about 10 min, on the other side when you slowly “disengage” from the act and you loose the erection:
You see it’s a fine line between sympaticus (hurrying/stress/general arousal) and parasympaticus (relaxation) during sex; YOU just need to find the right balance, and one other thing: sex (which is primitive act) is all about feelings/sensing so STOP thinking (analyzing/worrying) during sex.

God luck and hope this helps.

Supplement with ginkgo. I had the same problem, and this definitely helped. It was the only variable I changed, so I know it was the ginkgo or placebo effect. Either way, I am happy. Take it regularly and give it some time.

Well that’s the thing is I’m still soooo into it when it happens. It’s not at all for a lack of horniness or me no longer being in the mood or whatever. I will say, though, that every time it happens, I get more worried the next time that it will happen again, which I’m sure doesn’t help!

Hello.

Mate are you on any sort of antidepressant?

If so, which ones?

No, I don’t take any medications

Try this next time:

In the beginning (and during the sex) try to sense the sex (drive)/ hornyness not just with your dick but also with the rest of you body, otherwise there is great chance that you are to tense, AND if you feel some tension in what ever body part try to relax it (ex. Don’t tighten you arm or leg while doing her). I know this sound awkward but it’s a way to activate more of your parasympathetics nervous system.

Try this a couple of times (3-4) and see if you feel any difference.

Could it simply be a mental/ emotional thing?

If the woman I’m with gives off any indication whatsoever that she isn’t really into it, then my wood quality is immediately impacted negatively.

If she’ really into it but has something going on that turns me off sexually- odor for example- then I will also lose wood.

If you can get it up, the the ED issue isn’t really there- it then strikes me that it must be other than physical.

Nah she’ll be really into it until it happens, I’ll be doing really well, hitting all the right spots! The past few days I’ve quit caffeine, and as per another forum post, aspartame as well, and it actually seems to be helping a lot. The next week or two will be the real test