The Chinese believed that the entire universe is pervaded with life energy. They call this energy “Chi”. It is Chi that creates life and through its careful management one can achieve good health, sex and longevity. The “Chi” courses through our body in the energy circuitry known as the organ-meridian system. This bio-energy system has formed the basis of virtually all traditional Chinese and Ayurvedic(Indian) medicines. Significant research in the East and the West in the last two decades have done much to validate the Chinese system which will invariably lead to changes in Western medical practices.
The Chinese regard sexual energy to be as indispensable to human health and longevity as rain falling on the fields is to plant life. According to the Chinese Taoists sexual energy is the only energy that can be reproduced or created. Not surprisingly, Taoist physicians took a long and careful look at human sexual behavior. They believed that the essential difference between the sexual nature of man and woman lie in the different nature of male and female orgasm. When a man ejaculates, he ejects his semen from his body. When a woman reaches orgasm, she too ejaculates , but these secretions are mostly internal and are retained in her body. For both men and women sexual essence is an important storage battery for vital Chi energy and a major source of resistance and immunity. When a man ejaculates every time he has intercourse, he is gradually robbing himself of his primary source of vitality and immunity, leaving him weak, vulnerable to disease, and shortening his lifespan. Meanwhile, the woman remains strong both from her own orgasmic secretions and from her assimilation of the potent male essence. But if she remains with the same male, a male who does not practice semen retention, her capacity will be diminished and she too may grow vulnerable to disease as well as her life being shortened.
Three thousand years ago the Chinese recognized that men can achieve multiple orgasms by delaying and even withholding ejaculation. This is possible because orgasm and ejaculation are two distinct physical processes.
In the West this was not known until the 1940’s when Kinsey finally reported similar discoveries. Yet even several decades later most men remain unaware of their multi-orgasmic potential. Sex researchers Hartman and Fithian tested Thirty-three men who claimed to be multi-orgasmic. While these men were having sex with their partners their heart rates were monitored as well as the measuring pelvic contractions. What they found was pretty surprising: the arousal charts of these men were identical to those of multi-orgasmic women. Peng-Tze, a sex adviser to the famed Yellow Emperor, reported almost five thousand years ago “that when the Ying and the Yang are balanced in the man and the woman they make love as One Great Bird flying all night”.
Herb Profile: Deer Antler Velvet
DEER VELVET: Deer velvet has traditionally been regarded by Chinese physicians as the most efficacious aphrodisiac in Chinese pharmacopoeia. Not just any deer will do. Our deer velvet comes from the Sika deer, a breed that thrives in northeast China. The deer themselves are not killed for their antlers, which fall off naturally each year and are collected. Only the horns of the young deer are used, these are still covered in velvet and have the most potent properties. The horns of the young deer are laced through with potent hormones, enzymes, fatty acids and vital minerals important to sexual performance. The composition of velvet antler is nearly 50% amino acids, much of it being Arginine. Arginine helps in the production of nitric oxide which is the essential factor for penis erections and clitoral engorgement. Antler also contains prostaglandins. Prostaglandins are hormone-like substances involved in reproduction and nerve impulse transmission. Research has shown that antler velvet has the ability to increase male and female sexual function and potency as well as raise the libido of men and women.
The royal houses of the emperors are thought to have made the finest advancements through the energy and insights of great Chinese herbalists. Deer Antler Velvet is believed to balance and normalize negative conditions and imbalances. In western medicine, this is called homeostasis or health. This is defined as an optimal balance of mental and physical well being. When the body loses its normal homeostasis, adverse symptoms appear. Symptoms are not the cause of health problems, but rather an expression of the body’s efforts to defend its weakest areas and bring the body back into balance. In the Orient, this balance of the body energy is referred to as ying and yang. It has been said that deer antler velvet brings a balance to the ying and yang energies.
Click here for recommended deer antler velvet herbal supplement that we tested.
Semen, Orgasm and Your Health
We know Western medicine has claimed for decades that men naturally replenish their semen supply soon after ejaculation and that the males’ capacity to produce semen is limitless. This is a highly misleading generalization. Simply compare ejaculation with blood donation. After donating a pint of blood, you feel weak and tired for a day or two until the lost pint is replenished. For this reason, blood clinics advise donors not to give blood more than a few times each year.
According to Chinese physicians and a growing contingency of Western, holistic physicians, the loss of semen is even harder to replace than blood. Not only must the body invest enormous energy to replenish semen but it must also reestablish proper hormone balance. This is why you sometimes fall asleep after coming. There is also a psychogenic response: that feeling of the blues which often follows ejaculation as well as loss of sexual interest in your partner, who may well be ready for more action.
Understand that there is a difference between orgasm and ejaculation. We are ALL FOR ORGASM! The more - the BETTER. After all, we were conceived in orgasm and orgasmic energy permeates every cell of our body. What the Taoist learned was that orgasm, multi orgasms without ejaculation, were not just possible but lead to a healthier, longer life. Orgasm and the circulation of orgasmic sexual energy becomes more important as we grow older. To a Taoist, 100 years was just a normal life span. It is documented that a Taoist life went beyond 100 years. This is the reason that Taoism is usually taken up as a practice when one enters his 40’s or 50’s.
The techniques that we are about to describe were tested and refined by countless lovers over thousands of years in the laboratory of real life. These techniques will help you and your partner increase your vitality and longevity, your health and sexuality as well. By practicing these techniques, you will achieve more harmony with your lover, add greatly to her satisfaction and understand the true joy of loving which is the ecstasy of two bodies and souls mingling and uniting in poetry. These exercises will help you make love to your partner ecstatically and poetically.
Now…lets begin to Put the Loving Back Into Living.
The Microcosmic Orbit
The Taoist believed that humanity was vital to the grand scheme of the universe. They believed that if humans were in harmony with the universe they could achieve immortality. Humans are the living ray (or light) of the cosmic light. The macrocosm is the universe and humans are a microcosm of the universe. The more we are in harmony with the universe, the more easily we can open to, unite with and absorb and enjoy the limitless energy of the universe.
Indeed, within the last century, physics and biology have radically changed the way we view the universe. What used to be called “things” are now viewed as both “waves” and “particles”. The universe is now thought to be a dynamic web of interwoven energy patterns. In 1971, Dennis Gabor received a Nobel Prize for constructing the first hologram. A hologram is essentially a three dimensional photograph made of light. What is important to understand about a hologram is that every part of it, no matter how minute, is an exact reflection of the whole. This is precisely what the Taoist wrote over 3,000 years ago.
The practice they developed which is still practiced by millions throughout Asia, is Circulating the Chi in THE MICROCOSMIC ORBIT. By circulating this Chi/light energy, we reconnect ourselves with the cosmic light of the universe. This meditative exercise is the foundation for all the other exercises, which will follow.
This orbit is made up of two channels; the BACK CHANNEL and the FRONT CHANNEL. The Back Channel begins at the perineum (between the anus and genitals) and runs along the back of the body from the tip of the tailbone, up the spine and neck to the crown of the head and finally down the forehead to the cleft of the palate.
The Front Channel runs from your tongue to your throat down the midline of your body, through your navel to the pubis and back to the perineum.
Here’s how you do it:
1. Sit on the edge of a chair. Relax. Feet solidly on the ground. Hands cupped in your lap. Keep the spine straight but loose. Sit quietly relaxed and notice the energy within you rising up the back channel. You might feel a tingling and a warmth or a chill up your spine…this is Chi Energy.
2. Bring the energy up your spine to the crown. Allow the energy to circulate.
3. As you place the tongue on the upper palate (the roof of your mouth), allow the energy to flow down the Front Channel, to the throat, past the heart, into the navel, down to the pubis and back to the perineum.
AWARENESS TIP: If you experience points where the energy will not flow…massage these areas. Feel the warmth and energy fill the area. Continue.
What you are striving for is to get the energy flowing in a upward/downward circle. For some of you, the energy will move quite slowly. For others, it will move quite rapidly. Bear in mind what is important is that you open these major channels so that energy can flow easily in either direction. When the circle of the downward/upward motion is established, keep it cycling. Ten to fifteen minutes. Do this exercise upon wakening and before bed.
The Microcosmic Orbit is simple and yet exceedingly complex. Volumes have been written regarding the various techniques to perform it. Please relax with it and proceed to the following exercises.
Imagine there is a warm, radiant light inside you. Then guide the light up and down, through your body. You’ll be amazed at what you feel. This is your Chi Energy. It’s there, in you, all the time.
1. BREATH CONTROL
Breathing is the gateway through which we gain control of our body. When we are approaching orgasm, our heart rate increases. So the first thing we must learn is to control our heart rate through rhythmic, slow, deep breathing.
A. Sit in a chair. Relax. Make small circles clockwise and counter clockwise first with feet, then hips, each shoulder, then neck.
B. Rub hands together. Feel their warmth. Place hands on navel.
C. Inhale through your nose drawing the air into the lower abdomen. Your abdomen should expand like a balloon outward and downward.
D. Now Exhale through your nose, releasing the air gently from the abdomen. Pull in your abdomen toward the back of the spine letting all the air out while keeping chest and shoulders relaxed.
During the Exhale, you should feel your penis and testicles gradually pull up. Concentrate on this movement.
Repeat this exercise 36 times. Increase gradually to 4 reps per day.
Belly Breathing can be done anywhere, anytime. As you advance, it is important to try this exercise while doing other activities: working at your desk, watching TV, driving in the car, etc. This will help to increase your concentration so this rhythmic breathing along with the feeling of the rising of your testicles becomes natural and unforced.
2. STRONGER SEX MUSCLES
Here are two of the most valued and effective erotic exercises known. Our genitals consist mostly of involuntary (smooth) muscles. They are surrounded by and intimately linked to the voluntary (skeletal) muscles in the pubic-coccygeal region. This specific web of voluntary muscles exist between the testicles and the anus. This is the perineium. These muscles help in the erection of the penis and in ejaculation. The following exercise will give you greater control of your erection and increase coital endurance. There are two versions : The Quick Squeeze and The Slow Squeeze
The Quick Squeeze
A. Sit in a chair, feet on the ground. Relax.
B. Contract as much as possible the PC muscle as if you were trying to hold back urination. You will feel the anus tightening and the testicles moving upward. After a few seconds, relax the muscles completely. Alternately squeeze and relax. Squeeze and relax. 36 times.
C. Perform this exercise 3 to 4 times daily - 36 squeezes each time.
D. Double your repetition each week until you are performing 24 repetitions, 36 times each/every week.
The Slow Squeeze
This exercise combines the Belly Breathing with the pubic squeeze. This is much more powerful than the quick squeeze because it is done more slowly and the deep diaphragmatic breathing requires more concentration.
A. Sit in a chair, feet on the ground. Relax as in the Quick Squeeze.
B. Breath in slowly through your nose. Contract the PC muscles as you slowly inhale, expanding the diaphragm as far as possible.
C. Hold your breath while keeping the PC contracted for 6 seconds.
D. Slowly relax and release all tension in the PC muscles.
E. Repeat 36 times. Build to 3 or 4 repetitions per day, 36 times each.
The sexual PC muscles are linked to the sacral and coccygeal nerve trunks. The nerves communicate sensations to the brain and are responsible for rhythmic contractions of the sexual organs during orgasm.
Start to feel a difference in your stamina almost immediately!
3. SELF PLEASURING
Most of us did not grow up with the understanding that sex was natural and an important part of our health. We gave dirty words to the act and the idea of touching ourselves was considered downright sinful. But still we went to the bathroom, brought our favorite pornography, locked the door and jerked off as fast as we could. Sexologists claim that over 95% of men masturbate. Masters and Johnson and other modern clinical sex therapists, tell us that masturbation is natural and can help us relieve tension as well as prepare us for the act of sex with a partner. What they don’t tell us is that we must unlearn the early habits we formed while masturbating. Taoists believed that masturbation or “solo cultivation” was the primary way of developing ejaculatory control and of learning how to circulate the healthy sexual energy to revitalize the body.
You must find a comfortable place where you will not be disturbed. Try not to use pornography. What you are trying to do is shift your focus to your own body and the sensations you feel.
A. Lubricate your penis. Vegetable oil is the best. Lotions dry out.
B. Start stimulating the penis. Stimulate the whole penis all along the shaft, working your way up to the head. Chinese physicians believe that different parts of the penis correspond to different parts of the body. Avoid overworking one area to the exclusion of the others. Balance the sexual energy. Touch your balls, rubbing the testicles lightly while pulling gently on the scrotum. Explore the perineum, the area between the anus and the rectum . Just in front of the anus is the MILLION DOLLAR POINT. Apply pressure there and rub rhythmically. This pressure will imitate the prostate contraction and will aid you in warding off ejaculation.
C. Notice what is happening to your self physically:
- the tingling sensation at the base of your penis
- the various levels of arousal states
- the changes in your erection
- feel and listen to your heartbeat
D. Time is very important. Try and go 15 to 20 minutes without ejaculation. When you feel you’re getting near, STOP. Try squeezing your PC muscle. Use this to hold back ejaculation. Rest. Gain control.
E. Start again. Continue as long as you like.
Understand that you are now arousing powerful energy, circulating it solely in the genital area.
4. LOVING CULTIVATION
In order to cultivate love you must first love yourself. Sexual energy magnifies whatever is in your body both positive and negative. If you feel hate - sexual energy will increase this. So it very important that the energy you are circulating is a loving energy. This exercise will be performed in order to transform the love you feel for yourself to that of your partner.
The Taoist performed “loving cultivation” by breathing “smiling” energy down to each major organ.
A. Smile “loving energy” down to the genital area. Feel the smiling, loving energy pervade your muscles, molecules and electrical nerve centers. Concentrate this loving energy. Put your right hand on your penis and your left hand on your heart. Smile loving energy to both areas of your body. Feel the connection between these two centers. Draw the energies together.
B. Now begin to stimulate the penis as in the previous exercise; along the tip, shaft, balls and perinium. Feel the loving energy spread upwards. Feel the warmth spread up your spine, your back, neck, head, chest, abdomen arms, legs, feet while you continue to stimulate your penis.
C. When you feel yourself getting close to the point of no return, Stop. Take deep breathes. Contract your PC muscle. You may try pushing the Million Dollar Point to see which is the most effective for you. THE MUST IMPORTANT POINT IS TO EXPERIENCE THE FEELING OF STOPPING THE AROUSAL PHASE.
D. Take the sexual, loving energy and draw it up your spine as if you were sipping a straw. Suck or draw the energy up your spine while squeezing your PC muscle. It is important to understand that it is the contracting of the anus, this squeezing action that literally pumps the energy up the spine. If you are feeling too hot. Stop for 30 seconds. Then resume again.
E. After you have peaked several times, stop. Relax. Try to feel the sexual, loving energy around your body.
What this exercise teaches is the difference between ejaculation and orgasm. This exercise is the first step in that direction.
5. THE EARLY DRAW
The Early Draw or Cool Draw is the way in which we draw sexual energy from our body and through our body. The Early Draw, also known as testicle breathing, can be used to decrease the urge to ejaculate when you are sexually aroused.
A. Hold your testicles with one hand - until you feel sexual energy stirring.
B. Inhale - pulling up the muscles in the genital region; the testicles, the penis, anus, etc.
Again, imagine your spine is a straw sipping the testicle energy up your tail bone.
C. Exhale. Relax.
D. Imagine the energy traveling up your spine to your head. Try to circle this energy around your head.
E. Touch your tongue to the roof of your mouth. This is the door latch that closes and opens the front channel so that the energy may flow down the front of your body to your navel.
You may feel a blockage somewhere in one of your channels - either the Back Channel or the Front Channel. If you are experiencing this, just massage the area where the blockage seems to be.
The reason why we call this the Early Draw is that while you are making love you should perform this when you begin to feel the sexual energy in your testicles. This will help in suppressing ejaculation. 6. THE BIG DRAW
We use the BIG DRAW when the sexual energy is at its peak. The BIG DRAW is a very powerful practice. Energy is drawn up to the brain and then brought down to the navel making sure that the energy does not get too hot.
A. Assume a standing position. Pleasure yourself until you have a strong erection.
B. Stop pleasuring yourself. Contract your PC muscle while curling your toes hard on the floor.
C. Inhale. Squeeze your buttocks tightly and draw the sexual energy from the perineum, around the anus and tail bone up the spine.
D. Take short inhalations. Contract the PC muscles sending waves up your spine, undulating your spine back and forth. Continue taking short inhalations and undulating the spine simultaneously pulling the energy from the base of your neck into your head.
E. Roll your eyes up and backwards while pulling the energy up into the crown of your head. Your erection should decrease.
F. Repeat 3 times.
G. On the fourth series, draw when the energy is in the crown. Use your mind and all your senses to spread the energy around your brain. Do this 9 times one way then 9 times in the other direction. You may feel a tingling like a chill, a shivering up your spine into your head. This tingling might continue as you circulate the energy in your head. What you are experiencing is something close to a mini-orgasm. Relax.
H. When you feel the brain is full. Touch your tongue to your palate - opening the door. You will feel the energy flowing down the front channel from your eyebrows through your nasal passage, down your throat, to your heart and finally your navel. SMILE.
The pleasure you will feel is indescribable!
Reaching orgasm, multiple orgasms and expanded orgasms requires knowledge and skill and effort from the woman as well as the man. If you are lucky enough to have a partner who is studying the HEALING LIGHT WOMAN’S GUIDE TO PASSIONATE LOVEMAKING, this next section will become a lot easier for you. If you can’t convince your partner or you are doing this program solo… read on, you will certainly discover benefits.
In learning to satisfy your partner, the most important thing is to remove your ego. Remember, you are not out to give her the “best” orgasm. You are not trying to be the greatest lover in the world. Men who get hung up on sexual performance miss the point. Replace performance with pleasure, both hers and yours. The best lovers are men who are completely relaxed. They are aware of the pleasure in their partner’s body as well as their own.
Dane and Trost, authors of “Male Multiple Orgasm” found that it was easier for a man to become multiorgasmic with a familiar partner with whom there was emotional closeness. Each multiple-orgasmic man they interviewed mentioned that their goal was not to have multiple orgasms but to have pleasurable and satisfying lovemaking. Before we understand what leads to orgasm or even multiple orgasm we must understand the object of our affection.
On the lower part of the woman’s belly is the mon veneris, (Mount of Venus). This is the padded hair covered top part of the pelvic bone. The Mons is above the clitoris and some women find this can be a very erogenous zone if stroked lightly.
Descending downward from the mons are two outer lips. When the woman is not aroused they remain fairly flat.
The inner lips unlike the outer lips are hairless. When aroused they can vary in color from pink to dark brown and even purple. They become engorged during arousal and can swell two to three times normal size. When the lips become bright red, orgasm is approaching.
As you follow the inner lips downward just below the mons, you will find the clitoris. Usually the clitoris is nestled under a hood of skin and can only be seen by pulling the hood back. Most women prefer stimulation of the shaft rather than the very tip. The clitoris, similar to the penis, is highly sensitive, particularly after orgasm. The clitoris and the penis are very similar. Both originated from the same embryonic tissue.
What is truly unique about the clitoris is that is the only organ in either sex that is there exclusively for sexual pleasure.
Down from the clitoris is the entrance to the vagina. The walls of the vagina rest against one another. These many folds explain the vagina’s ability to expand and contract.
As a woman is aroused, her vagina widens and balloons out - which usually reduces the stimulation in the back. The outer third actually tightens as it becomes engorged. This is one of the reasons why a woman can hold on to even a small penis. As we have mentioned in the women’s exercises, the stronger your partner’s PC muscle, the more she can contract her muscles around your penis, the greater will be her orgasms as well as your own. If your partner enjoys deep penetration, there are a number of positions that shorten her vagina and make deep thrusting a lot easier. (We will explain these later).
Some women are more sensitive near the opening of the vagina, others near the back walls. There really is no universal here. You need to explore with your partner. Take your time. Ask her questions. Let her tell you where she feels the best.
The “G” Spot
The physician, Ernest Grafenberg described a spot inside a woman’s vagina that, when stimulated, can cause a woman to become very aroused. Theory has it that the “G” spot is a collection of glands, ducts, blood vessels and nerve endings that surround a woman’s urethra.
Most women say that the “G” spot is located about one to two inches from the opening of the vagina on the upper front wall, just behind the pubic bone. The best way to find the “G” spot is when your partner is highly aroused. Try licking around her clitoris until she gets quite hot. Then slowly insert your index finger, curving it softly upward toward the pubic bone. There you may be able to feel a ridged piece of skin or something bumpy. Stroke this gently while continuing to lick and gently suck her clitoris. See what happens.
Some women find this area of their body totally off limits. Others find it a highly erogenous zone. If she is interested in anal sex play, be sure to use lubricant. Go very slowly and wait to allow her to relax. Then apply stimulation.
In Western society, large breasts have become such a powerful symbol of desire that one often loses sight of their primary function. Their most important role is as a source of warm milk for babies. There are many interesting theories concerning our obsession with large breasts. Is it a result of a bottle fed, nurture-starved culture? Whatever the reason and for all those men and women who believe that size reflects sexual appetite, let us once and for all dispel this myth. Many exologists that believe women with small breasts are more highly aroused. It is our contention that the size of breasts - as with the size of a man’s penis - matters very little.
All this however should not belie the point that the breasts can be highly sensitive, erogenous areas of a woman’s body. Men often zoom in on the nipples right away. This can be a turn-off. Some women enjoy immediate stimulation. Most however prefer a lighter, more indirect touch. Try caressing your partner’s chest, abdomen, neck, before touching the breasts. Allow the nipples to become erect before you touch them. Rub your fingers together which will increase your chi energy. Then touch her nipples lightly. Try to feel the electricity flowing between your finger and her nipple. Licking around her breast and slowly up to her nipple will generate chi energy. Your tongue contains and emits an enormous amount of chi.
There is a considerable amount of information that has been written regarding orgasm, particularly a woman’s orgasm. The main debate seems to be whether a woman experiences a clitoral orgasm or a vaginal orgasm or both. Researchers say the physical response known as the orgasm is simply the contraction and expansion or pulsation that can happen throughout your body. The point at where the orgasm begins in terms of stimulation can be and often is, anywhere on the body. It could be the inside of the thighs, the inside of the ear as well as the clitoris and the vagina. Of course there aren’t many women who can come by the mere licking of the ear. According to Taoists, there are numerous kinds of orgasms which can take place in different parts of the body. We just have to know how to circulate the energy properly and understand how to build these energies into a sensation that then becomes an orgasm.
Pleasuring Your Partner
In both the Taoist and Tantric traditions of lovemaking, one of the most important elements is the exchanging of bodily fluids. Both traditions consider the secretions of the mouth, the sweat glands and the vagina essential to vitality and sexual potency. Chinese physicians take a jujube fruit and insert it into the vagina of a young woman and then give it to an elderly man to stimulate his sexual prowess. Although we cannot vouch for the benefits of jujube fruit laced with vaginal fluid, we can attest to the rejuvenating effect that the exchange of secretions has on both partners.
Foreplay should be a slow, leisurely pleasure. We recommend at least fifteen to twenty minute of foreplay before touching the genitals directly, (the clitoris or inside the vagina). It is the anticipation and growing intensity that will send your partner to her boiling point.
Begin at your partner’s extremities; her feet and then slowly up her outer leg. Don’t be afraid to hold the calf firmly. There are pressure points below the calf that help to open your partner to arousal. Work your way up the left side of her body, briefly stopping inside her thighs. Caress and lick around her navel. Turn her. Caress her back, slowly up to and around her neck, then up to her ears and earlobes. Gently touch her eyes, kissing them softly as you move down to her lips. Suck on her tongue lightly, enjoying the taste of her saliva. Circulate your hands over her body, lightly. Remember what we have said about the breasts. Work your way down her right side, licking along the navel, moving down the outer thigh to the calf and down to the feet and toes of the right foot. This circulation from the left to right meridian will get her Chi energy cooking. She may now begin to pull you upward toward her genitals. Still keep it slow and steady. Moving now with your tongue slowly alternating between the inner thighs upwards towards the vagina.
Do not focus exclusively on your partner’s clitoris. Use your tongue to slide along her inner lips at the base of her vagina and her perineum as well. When you are finally ready to reach the clitoris, your partner’s sexual energy and excitement should be enormous. Don’t lose connection with the rest of her body. Some women feel disconnected during oral sex. Use your hands to continue caressing her legs, belly, breasts, hands and face. Some women enjoy their breast and nipples massaged while their partner sucks their clitoris. As with all techniques, there are no universal turn-ons and there are some women who might find this a turn-off.
As for clitoral techniques, try brushing your lip along the shaft, flicking your tongue and sucking. Work around the shaft and then up each side. Gently suck the tip of the clitoris. Be careful not to give too much pressure. Light, rhythmic pressure is best. Try inserting a finger or two as her arousal mounts. Reach for the “G” spot. As the juices flow, suck in and swallow as much as possible.
Please understand this is only one sequence for foreplay. Create anew each time you make love. Remember, what makes sex mechanical is the simplistic search for bodily levers and push buttons.
Knowledge of your partner’s body is essential but there is NO SUBSTITUTE FOR SINCERE AFFECTION. Bring affection and love to every aspect of your lovemaking. Watch the utter loveliness of your partner’s excitement. Listen to her breathing. Feel her heart pumping. Match your breath with hers. Get your hearts in rhythm.
Entering Your Partner
Regardless of your attitude toward life, nearly everyone seeks at some point, to anchor themselves in a love relationship. We all feel the power of sexual energy. Yet frequently, the polarity between men and women is overlooked…the subtle flow between the two magnetic poles. Balancing and harmonizing the flow of energy that exists between these poles is the most basic secret of mastering all the major esoteric traditions of lovemaking. It is the natural law of the universe…that the positive and negative forces attract and bond. This is as true for a pair of magnets as it is for us. The Taoists called these polarities yin-yang - terms that have now become popular in the West.
Metaphorically, Yang is fire and Yin is water. Anyone who has played the game of “Fire, Water, Rock, shoot ” on the playground, knows what happens when fire fights water. Water always wins.
And so it is when a man inserts his penis into a woman with the idea that he will dominate her, conquer her. That man is destined to lose the battle. But when he realizes that the sexual energy between himself and his lover is continuous and belongs to them both, their exchange can reach an extraordinary intensity and balance. It’s as if their pulsating bodies, charged with electricity, are fused together as one pillar of exquisite, spiraling energy. This is a total orgasm of the body and mind where the ego shrinks to the size of a grain of sand and hums in chorus with the oceans of the universe.
When you enter your lover - insert your penis into her vagina - you must do this with the greatest love and tenderness. If you have done foreplay correctly, your partner’s energy has already been mounting for some time. You are now beginning to climb. The goal is not to climb just one peak together but an entire series of mountains that will lead to intense pleasure. And where there is enjoyment to be had, why not learn to take your time.
The Century Count - Building Staying Power
Breathe in and out, deeply from the abdomen. This is one count. Now slowly count from one to one hundred. Let no extraneous thoughts enter your mind. This calming practice will develop self control and greatly reduce the urge to ejaculate. If you find yourself too “hot”, use this method as a way of “cooling” down. Stop all movement. Do the Century Count again and use PC contractions.
Nine Shallow - One Deep Thrust
The purpose of this thrusting technique is to go 9 shallow and 1 deep. The 1 deep, besides varying the sensory stimulation, forces the air out of the vagina. This allows you to create a vacuum inside her with the shallow thrusts which follow. Never draw completely out. This would break the seal. Hover on the outermost inches of the vagina and when your partner is feeling empty - fill her. This method creates desire, then satisfies. Do 9 complete sets. Every time you pause between sets, give her a deep kiss, sucking in her saliva. This will charge you with Yin essences and increase your endurance.
Up and Down Deep Thrusts
This technique will increase your ability to not ejaculate especially when your partner is peaking or in the throes of orgasm. The most sensitive part of the penis is the head. The least sensitive part is the base. This method involves thrusting the penis deeply into the vagina and keeping it there. When you insert your penis deeply, your pubic area and the base of your penis is right up against your partner’s clitoris, her most sensitive area. Instead of pulling back, stay deep and rub and thrust up and down repeatedly. The quickening rhythm will greatly enhance your partner’s pleasure and orgasm.
Some dancers have perfected a movement in their dances which looks like spiraling of hips. According to the ancient Tao, a nail thrust straight in comes out the easiest, but a nail screwed in stays a long time. Maybe there was more to it when teenage girls fainted with excitement watching Elvis and his pelvic gyrations. Because it is precisely these gyrations, when performed during intercourse, that can excite passion especially in latter orgasms.
Start by rotating the hips. Try alternating with several thrusts left and right. This will loosen you. Go back to rotating one way than the other. Try to isolate the sacrum by arching your back slightly than push your tailbone forward. Continue rotating. (See Positions)
Riding the Wave
Because a woman’s sex organs are inside her body, it is far easier for her to transmute the sexual energy to higher centers in her body. Taoist medical texts from the 8th century suggest that men should stimulate women to have as many orgasms as possible in order to produce as much ‘yin’ energy as possible. Perhaps the very reason that we men continue to be so fascinated by a female’s orgasm is because of what it teaches us about our own. The female orgasm is an inward implosion, the very structure of her body is vibrating and exploding inwardly. By harmonizing your body with your lovers, you become aware of a new polar opposite. It is this very mystery of being that women can bestow on men.
Our problem is that we as men being ‘yang’, have an ever expanding energy. Every ‘act’ we ‘create’ is at the expense of great energy. Exchanging sexual energy with your partner, the orgasm of the mind, body and spirit is entered in and arrived at EFFORTLESSLY, as your body begins to synchronize itself with your lovers, your entire body will vibrate at the same speed as hers. Some may experience a rise of energy up the spine, leading to explosive openings in the crown and third eye centers. Others however, will experience an absolute balance of yin energy (the earth) along with the bliss transcending it with heavenly (yang) energy leaving them sublimely empty and full. For the yogis, the taoists, tibetan monks and zen priests, when you reach this state…you are immortal.
A Map for Multiple Orgasms
In the previous exercises we have trained ourselves to contain or delay our emissions. We have discovered that our sexual energy goes through various arousal phases, and through our practices we have become more aware and efficient about controlling these phases and peaks.
Through solo cultivation we have discovered how we can linger on the edge of these peaks and extend these sensations from seconds to minutes and longer.
We have followed the pattern of pleasuring our lovers first. And we have discovered how emotionally and spiritually satisfying this can be.
Before your next lovemaking session speak to your partner about some of these thoughts. Elicit her feelings, seek her participation, and welcome her wishes and needs. Begin cautiously and with care.
A. You have been making love for some time. Perhaps you have already brought your partner to orgasm. Concentrate now on coordinating your breathing with hers. Take slow deliberate breaths.
B. Inhale and visualize the energy from your perineum expanding up your tailbone. Spiral this energy up your spine to the crown of your head.
C. While you are visualizing the energy upward, expand the energy further by radiating it outward. Create a shivering sensation, as if a chill is shooting up your spine. This chill, however, is warm. Allow your body to quiver with it, shaking the sexual energy outward and upward. Your partner will feel greatly eroticized by these continuous shallow thrusts.
D. When you have finally gotten the sexual energy into the crown of your head, allow yourself to vocalize. In Tantric tradition it is the fifth chakra of the throat that triggers the orgasmic response. Let the timbre of your voice resonate in the lower octaves. The resonance of the lower registers will release your orgasmic energy. Allow your partner to join you in this song of ecstasy.
E. Feel the orgasmic energy radiating and pulsating within your crown. Pump, release, and relax as you would when you are ejaculating semen. You now have had your first dry orgasm.
Perform the following ” cooling down ” methods.
A. Place the tongue to the palate, feel the connection. Breath in and out. Allow the orgasmic energy to flow downward from your throat to your heart and finally to your abdomen. Let the energy simmer.
B. Pull your penis out of your partner so you are still inside but you are no longer thrusting. Stay here and relax. Relaxing allows the blood vessels in your penis to dilate and allows you to exchange more of your sexual energy with your partner. Your erection may decrease somewhat, which will let the hormone filled blood return to fortify your body and allow new blood to flow to your penis when you get hard again.
C. Continue holding each other, kissing and circulating energy. You may want to try gently sucking your lover’s upper lip. (Yes she will truly enjoy this!) Have her suck on your lower lip as well. The frenulum is the protrusion of skin between your lover’s upper lip and her teeth. The Taoists and Tantric priests believe that there is a deep connection between the frenulum and the clitoris. Suck on this area as if sucking on your lover’s clitoris. This exchange of energy will rejuvenate you and excite your partner greatly.
D. When you feel like proceeding again take the energy from the abdomen down to the perineum and repeat the entire sequence again.
You are now on your way to the joys of multiple orgasms.
Words of caution
Don’t be surprised if at first the energy moves spontaneously and unpredictably. You may experience energy rising up from the midline of your body between you and your partner. Some couples experience energy shooting to the top of their heads and downward over them, while others report the feeling of being surrounded in a cocoon of energy. If you or your partner experience any of these, don’t get worried. Just relax and enjoy the movement.
Extending Your Orgasm
Now get ready for intense pleasure unlike any other
You have been pleasuring each other for sometime. You and your lover’s sexual energy is to the point where it is literally so turned on that it is ready to circulate.
Assume a comfortable position for exchanging energies. We recommend the male sitting in a half lotus and the female sitting in his lap, her legs wrapped around his thighs.
Look into your lover’s eyes. Send love and energy through your gaze. Insert your penis into her vagina. If her PC muscle is strong, she can hold you tightly. Allow yourselves to rock, establishing a slow rhythm. Slowly stop thrusting, hold your lover close to your chest and place your cheek against hers, your nose close to her ear. In this position, her nose should also be close to your ear. LISTEN TO EACH OTHER’S BREATHING. You may inhale and exhale together or as in tantric tradition, one may inhale while the other exhales almost as if you are taking in each other’s breath. Circle the energy as discussed previously in the Microcosmic Orbit. Draw the energy up by contracting the anus and then guide the energy down the front through your tongue.
Breathe in sync. Each of you should draw the energy from your genitals up to your crown….then down. Up, then Down.
While you are inhaling, envision the energy being drawn from her vagina into your penis, around the perineum up the sacrum, up your spine, to the crown of your head.
Now exhale and let the energy descend down to your tongue. If your tongue is touching your lover’s, exchange the energy.
Bring the energy down to your navel. Exchange the energy. Circulate it as many times as you like.
Begin to visualize an infinite cycle of energy that moves all around your body in opposite directions.
Gradually a feeling of harmony will arise. You will begin to lose your ideas of “doing”. You will fall literally under the spell of ‘Yin’ energy. You are between Yin and Yang now. No one is leading. No one is following.
Eventually you will get the impression that you are one breath, one energy, one orgasm. You will not know who is male and who is female.
Stay like this for some time. You may talk…even laugh. What can you say in such moments of ecstasy . When ecstasy comes, never try to possess it. It will disappear the moment you try to keep it in your grasp.
Sexuality is a vital part of humanity. Most of us have been taught to be ashamed of our bodies. We have learned to disregard it both physically and spiritually.
What we have tried to give you with our Herbal Erotica formula and the techniques for Lovemaking, is a way of embracing this often ignored aspect of ourselves. What we have shown you was for a millenium closely guarded secrets …
Sexual Energy Is the Healing Light.
Please practice what we have shown you. Take the formula as directed. Share what you have experienced with others. The more pleasure you give, the more pleasure you will receive. The more you heal, the more you are healed.
Spread the word.
Putting It All Together
Things to Remember:
1. When making love, be most conscious of the energy exchange rather than towards orgasm or performance.
2. Learn to speak to your partner. Do it consciously and without blame.
3. Remember that nothing is more important than the love you share with each other.
4. Practice your microcosmic orbit meditation, your breathing, and P.C. exercises everyday.
5. Try not to ejaculate at least two out of every three times you make love. Semen retention is most important in the winter. Adjust yourself to the seasons.
6. Remember to slow your lovemaking down. Envision a very slow dance. Make your loving into an extended meditation.
7. Be very aware of your hands and the power of a simple touch. Make each touch consciously and allow the energy to radiate outside of you through your lover.
8. Be sure your eyes are open as often as possible. Connect your eyes intimately with your lovers.
9. It is sometimes better to receive then to give. Exchange the yin and yang roles frequently.
10. Remember that lovemaking is an art form. Be patient, you’ll get better with time and practice.