Hey guys I have been going through a bit of a difficult time lately, and I really think its all mental. I dated this girl for 2.5 years and everything was good sex wise, never had a problem making her cum, but I will say she was very easy and didn’t take much work. She would have multiple orgasms every time and this really made me feel good. With her I was always rock hard and ready to go and could last a decent amount if time with few stops here and there. She was on birth control so we never used condoms.
Being at 6.5 BP and 4.6 girth I was always happy with my penis, yea I wanted it to be a bit bigger, but who doesn’t. Bottom line is, it never affected me. Me and my girl friend break up and I find a new girlfriend about a half year later. We start to getting hot and heavy and the first time we have sex, I lose my erection due to being nervous/using a condom for the first time in awhile. Throughout the next few months the sex is good, and I give her a few vaginal and clitoral orgasms. Now these took a little more work than my ex. But in between these good times, there were times would I would lose my erection in a couple different positions but mainly when she is laying flat on the bed with her legs up and me standing.
After alot of thinking, I get these idea in my head thinking what if I am losing it because I’m not getting enough friction because my girth is slightly below average. This idea really fucks with my head and makes me really get down on myself. We have talks about certain things and all in all she thinks I’m ridiculous and that is definitely not the case. She is not as tight as my ex, but she feels pretty tight to me, I can insert one of my skinny fingers and barely wiggle it to touch both sides of her vagina.
The problem now is, the past few times we hung out, I’m just not my normal self, rock hard and ready to go. I stay pretty limp until she starts helping me. Now I think this has to do with my condom anxiety, my bad self image now, and my ability to maintain and last as long as I once could. I hate the whole condom thing because I feel I have to get it up super hard but keep it dry, meaning no head. The past couple times we have had sex, I literally almost busted putting the condom on, because I was trying that hard to get it up. We had sex still and she reached a clitoral orgasm, but the only reason I could last was because i just had her grind on me, with no up and down motion.
I feel good alot of the time, but then I think about my anxiety or my size and i get down and anxious and worried. I know her being on top has been a good position which I never really have lost it in, as well as doggy, or when I’m pinning her legs up. But I don’t get why my once favorite position is one that I keep losing my erection in, besides a couple times. Its killing me because I feel I can do the best in that position and control the urge to cum.
Any guys have similar problems? or maybe some insight on my problem? Anyone with similar size deal with something or feelings like this? I really just hope its all mental and not anything to do with my slightly less than average girth. I need to just be more positive and not let this get me down