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How can I cum faster?

12

Originally Posted by Esc
That’s not the problem. I don’t masturbate for days and sometimes I still have trouble cumming.

There is a huge difference between stopping something and going without for a few days.


PE Goal: 7.5" NBP x 5.8" MSG

Esc: I tried looking for forum posts that talk about “death grip masturbation syndrome” and “re-sensitization”. I found this blog. Even though the guy has some ads for fleshlight, this part just deals with explaining “death grip syndrome” and a plan for re-sensitizing your penis with nothing but your hands.

Anyway it explains what I was trying to say. Honestly I outta go through the one month thing he talks about, I think we PE’ers with all the jelqing etc could use doing this every once in a while.

Also I have to admit this section applies to me right now, I need to break this:

“But, death grip is also about being reliant on a single method of masturbating to a climax, and requiring more and more pressure to feel the same sensations—so much so that it interferes with your ability to enjoy the subtle stimulation of intercourse and affects your overall sexual happiness. So, although whatever method you use to masturbate may not be the same as what is described above, if you are reliant on your single method, the method is intense, and you have become unhappy with your sexual responsiveness, you’ve arrived at the same point.”

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What is masturbation death grip syndrome?

Masturbation and sex. Both feel wonderful and you’ve been doing it as often as you can since you discovered it. But here lately, it just doesn’t feel as good. You stroke, rub, tug, jerk, thrust—whatever it is you always do—but your penis just seems kind of numb. It’s taking forever sometimes to get the O’, and some days you just look at your penis and think, “why am I bothering”? Could it be that you’ve just gripped your penis so hard while masturbating all of these years that you’ve beaten the sensitivity out of it? You may very well be experiencing what is commonly called “death grip”, alright, but you most likely haven’t really beaten the sensitivity out of your penis. All of the nerve endings you’ve always had down there for enjoying touch and physical sexual sensations are all still there and alive, but your brain has become conditioned to your limited and direct method of stimulation over the years and it isn’t responding as intensely to the pleasure signals coming from your penis. In short, your brain is kind of bored with your sexual diet.

This can be a frustrating situation, not only when masturbating, but also during sex. Quite often, guys will develop a style of masturbation that is so tight, focused, fast, and intense, that they can have some trouble being responsive to more subtle forms of stimulation such as vaginal or oral sex. This can be frustrating for both partners. If your regular method of masturbation is the only way you can get off, and even that is getting to be a problem, you’ve probably got the “death grip”.

What masturbation death grip syndrome is not…

The good news is that you aren’t really damaged, and death grip isn’t a medical condition. It’s not a disease, it’s not something you come down with, and it’s not something that is irreversible. In fact, getting back in touch with what feels good can be a really pleasant exercise. However, sexual dysfunction could indicate other medical conditions. If you are experiencing numbness in your extremities, or any other issues along with trouble climaxing during sex, you may be experiencing medical problems that should be checked out by a doctor. These articles are not written by medical professionals and do not constitute any sort of medical advice. If trouble climaxing persists, or you are experiencing other issues, go to your doctor.

How did you get masturbatory death grip syndrome?

From the moment you discovered it felt good to touch it, you haven’t been able to leave it alone, right? That’s totally normal. And since then, you’ve done it a lot, and—as with anything good—more always seems better. And because you’ve done it a lot, probably starting when you were a kid, you’ve had to be quick about it to avoid the embarrassment of being caught in the act. (No matter how cool you are or how cool your parents, siblings, roommates, girlfriend, or whoever are, you just don’t want to get caught.) So, over time you’ve developed a technique for working up an orgasm very quickly. It’s probably a rather tight grip, very fast motion, and maybe some intense body contractions to help push you over. The tighter and faster you tried, the better it felt.

But, death grip is also about being reliant on a single method of masturbating to a climax, and requiring more and more pressure to feel the same sensations—so much so that it interferes with your ability to enjoy the subtle stimulation of intercourse and affects your overall sexual happiness. So, although whatever method you use to masturbate may not be the same as what is described above, if you are reliant on your single method, the method is intense, and you have become unhappy with your sexual responsiveness, you’ve arrived at the same point.

http://www.curedeathgrip.com/index.html


Last edited by sta-kool : 06-12-2010 at .

How to cure masturbation death grip syndrome—a general plan

Here are several things to try. This will take a bit of discipline, but oh what a fun exercise it can be. Remember, sex (and this includes masturbation) is supposed to be about fun, relaxation, and pleasure. There’s no reason to stress out over it.

Basic principles:

—Take a break and build up a burning desire for stimulation.
—Make time, then take your time.
—Utilize and experiment with a variety of methods to masturbate or reach orgasm.
—Focus on subtle sensations. Be gentle.
—Go for quality over frequency until you regain sensitivity.

Sensitivity Renewal in 1 month

Week 1: Take a break from stimulation for 1 week. Cease and desist.
Keep your hands (and anyone else’s) off your penis for one entire week. No sex. No masturbation. When you get erections, just endure them and appreciate them for what they are. Allow the tension and desire to build, and appreciate the pleasure of the erections themselves. Towards the end of the week, you should be going mad with desire to do something about it.

Also, during this focus on renewal, you might want to examine aspects of your lifestyle that contribute or detract from your overall wellness and sexual health. Believe it or not, a healthy diet, moderate exercise, adequate sleep, and good stress management can all help to improve your sex life.

Week 2: You get to masturbate once this week, but only when your penis tells you to and you must be gentle.
It doesn’t matter what day of the week it happens, but it is important to wait for an erection that happens on your own that you can’t ignore — not one that you’ve created. If you’ve gotten into the habit of stroking yourself from soft to hard in order to “wake” your penis up for masturbation, you may be contributing to your death grip by trying to masturbate when your body or brain is not really “in the mood” for it. You sensations will likely be better if you’re stroking your penis because it is practically commanding you to than if you’re trying to get it to wake up so you can get off. It’s ok to look at porn, read stories, or whatever it is that you might like to do, but wait for the erection to come on naturally—hands off. If it doesn’t command your attention all by itself, find something else to do for a while.

When this golden erection happens, make time for it. If you were about to run errands, do laundry, work out, go study, or whatever it was that you thought was so important, put it off for a while and take care of what you need. Also, go slow, take your time, and focus on sensations.

Take your time, be gentle, and use a loose grip. Remember, you are retraining yourself to be more responsive to gentle stimulation such as what you would feel during sex. In fact, you may want to consider getting something that makes masturbation feel more like sex, such as a Fleshlight.

Regarding your technique, you’re going to want to do two things:

1. Masturbate a variety of ways.
2. Masturbate in ways that feel a little more like sex.

Variety is the spice of life, and this is certainly true for sex and masturbation. Switch it up a little now and then to keep yourself from getting dependent on one single thing.

Most of the time though, it will be better to focus on methods that feel more like the sensations of sex. (This is why a Fleshlight might be a good idea.) Even if you haven’t experienced sexual intercourse, it’s still important to still focus on methods that provide a similar type of stimulation. A vagina is soft, silky, slippery, and warm. It engulfs the penis and makes contact with most of the surface of the penis. It’s impossible to get exactly the same feeling when masturbating, but by using a personal lubricant, such as KY Silk, using a full fist with a looser grip, and taking your time, you can at least add some qualities of the sex to your session. Use plenty of lube and glide your hand semi-loosely over your penis, letting the skin of your hand provide the friction that stimulates your penis—don’t move the skin of the penis itself—just glide over it. Your grip should be only about as firm as you would use to hold the hand of someone you like while on a walk in the park. Also, keep the speed of your stroking slow or moderate.

Weeks 3-4: Masturbate with a new technique only twice each week
As with the previous weeks, the rules are:

1. only when an erection happens on its own. Do not stroke yourself to an erection and then masturbate.
2. Do it only when you have enough time to take however long you need.
3. Use techniques that are more similar to sex, ie., gentle, lubricated, friction at a moderate speed.

What next?
If things are getting better, you can go back to masturbating more frequently, but some of the things you learned this past month need to be applied from now on. Those principles are:

—Be gentle.
—Take your time.
—Try to let erections happen naturally.
—Use lubricant.
—Try different methods periodically and focus on methods that simulate sex.

If you are still having some trouble, try repeating the steps for the month, but try to go two weeks without and then masturbate gently only once per week for the following two weeks of the month.

http://www.curedeathgrip.com/plan-a.html


Last edited by sta-kool : 06-12-2010 at .

Originally Posted by sta-kool
How to cure masturbation death grip syndrome—a general plan

I have to imagine that very few intact guys would have such a problem.

I don’t think the cure to this lack of sufficient stimulation is to go without stimulation. Your body was designed to give you pleasure. Let it. If somebody amputated half the pleasure-receptive skin from your penis, leaving the remainder exposed so it could dry and numb, then you just need to make some accommodations.

First, NEVER use dry skin-on-skin friction again. Sorry. Over. You were born with a sleeve of richly innervated skin to roll frictionlessly over your glans. If it’s gone, you need to avoid friction or you’ll cause your mucosa to callous over. Use lube. Also, NEVER use soap on you mucosal parts again. If you want to be fresher than rinsing with clear water gets you, then wash with a gentle non-soap liquid cleanser like Cetaphil. It doesn’t dissolve away your natural emolients so thoroughly.

Second, only go looking for pleasure when you’re “in the mood” and not just to relieve boredom. Our bodies are designed so the nerve endings are not on full alert all day, so we can get something done without distraction. Just because you can sometimes touch your genitals and feel nothing special does not mean you have gone numb.

Third, rejuvenate your glans and the adjacent mucosa by keeping these parts covered 24/7 with your own skin. Roll the remaining shaft skin forward so it covers the glans, and keep it there with an o-ring, a tape-ring, cross tape, or the silicone retaining cone I sell.

Fourth, consider growing your skin tube longer so it can function as a foreskin. It’s a lot easier to do than shaft lengthening. You can add at least an inch of new skin per year. There are various non-sugical foreskin restoration techniques, including using the devices I sell, but you can start today with zero investment. Just Google manual foreskin restoration techniques.

Before I restored my wife never did succeed in giving me an orgasm orally despite ten years of sincere effort. Now she can easily, as often as she likes (surprisingly, not as often as I’d like :) ).

-Ron Low

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