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Getting frustrated with Premature Ejaculation!

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Getting frustrated with Premature Ejaculation!

I can’t seem to get over this premature ejaculation thing! I’ve been practicing kegels for 6 months and I have a pretty strong PC muscle now. I’ve tried desensitizing creams. I’ve tried ejaculating an hour or so before hand and no matter what, the second my g/f gets intimate with me, my penis gets super hard and super sensitive. If she even touches it I’m like an 8 out of 10 on the “edging” scale. I try breathing deeply and trying to get my mind off of my penis but the sensation is so strong. If she goes down on me she gets in only like 30 seconds before I go over the edge.. and most of that time is me already passed the point of no return and squeezing. If we have intercourse, I get the condom on but after a few strides, I’m done.. It sucks because I’m losing interest in having sex because I feel so inadequate and I can’t perform. I’ve tried relaxation techniques, premature ejaculation hypnosis, creams, blah blah.. I don’t know what else to do..

What’s strange about this all is that there were a few times in my life that I’ve gone the whole time without even ejaculating and the feeling carried over for days.. so I either can go for a while or go for a few seconds. I don’t know why my body gets so sensitive and wants to release. Any advice?

Try two condoms one ontop of the other and also try to keep going even after you pop. With two condoms on it will be less sensitive. I know it is hard but the more you work at it the better it will get.


Started 10/1/04 Approaching 7x5, Going for 8x6

I do keep going after I pop for a few minutes but I get worried about the condom falling off and getting semen in her from the slickness. It’s happened before.

While I have no personal experience with this, I just read this months Mens Health(dec 2004) and there is an article in there by Dr. Ian Kerner, a certified clinical sexologist (what a job title!). There is waaaay too much info to relate but pick up the mag and give it a read. He also wrote a book called “She comes first: The thinking mans guide to pleasuring a women.” He also recommends a book on premature ejaculation and referred to it as THE definitive guide called “How to overcome premature ejaculation,” by Helen singer kaplan, M.D., P.H.D. (I thought is was interesting that this was written by a women).

In the article he gives a 6 point list to help with the problem. He also writes from a personal perspective because he himself suffered from the problem and writes a very touching story about how he lost a fiancee due to his problem prior to becoming a doctor.

Sorry I couldn’t type the whole article for you, it is kinda long for me, not the greatest typer. Not sure if you can get the same article online and menshealth.com or not, maybe try there or just hit the bookstore sometime.

Personally the only thing I do that occasionally forces me to last longer is I drink alcohol. I know this would not be recommended anywhere, especially by a medical person but it does have that effect on me.

Good luck Tmar!

nemisis,

I’ll check out the article, thanks! Funny, I’ve noticed alcohol does help “slow me down”. I did drink a glass of wine on Saturday night, rubbed in some desensitizing cream and I was done in 2 minutes ;)

tmar

Keep up the PE and you should do PE without getting your self off. You should learn how to edge while PE’ing and your dick should get used to being touched with out having to cum keep this up for at least a half hour to 1 hour and don’t give in and shoot it. Also the kegels should help after a while so keep it up with them also.


I haven't failed, I've found 10,000 ways that don't work. Thomas Edison (1847-1931)

Originally Posted by tmar89
nemisis,

I’ll check out the article, thanks! Funny, I’ve noticed alcohol does help “slow me down”. I did drink a glass of wine on Saturday night, rubbed in some desensitizing cream and I was done in 2 minutes ;)

If you find the article, could you paste it up on this thread? Pretty please?

Check out this conversation I just had with my g/f online! It’s a confidence booster.

her: when you are very senstitive, does it bother you when i go down on you?
me: no it doesn’t.. i wanted to talk to you about this.. i dont know why I get very sensitive like I was all weekend
me: it bothers me actually
her: really??? why?
me: because I want the feeling to last longer with you.. it spikes way too quickly
me: its weird because there are times I can control the feeling and ride it for a while.. but then other times its way too intense to handle
her: gotcha
her: i was curious
me: does that bother you?
her: it doesnt bother me
me: you sure?
her: yeah
her: its how you react
me: i know
her: nothing wrong with that
me: i know
me: and I appreciate you saying that.. i get self conscious about that too
her: sometimes i get super sensitive
me: i want to make you feel good but when my body goes over the edge too quickly, i feel like I cant make you feel good then
her: trust me you do…sometimes it doesnt take much
me: ok
her: do you ever feel like you dont???
me: for instance.. sunday.. i really wanted to feel you.. but i got really sensitive very fast and it didnt take much to put me over.. so i sometimes feel that when i go over and start to go down a bit, i doesnt do much for you
her: no it doesn’t bother me..you have to understand that somtimes im overly sensitive too
me: im glad to hear you say I make you feel good.. i just got worried that because i can have a “quick trigger” at times, it would upset you
her: nah we’re a good physical match…if you didnt make me feel good, you’d know it
me: true
her: i love the feel of you in me…love wrapping around you

… it continues on!!! But I still want to last longer!!!

Tmar,

what worked for me sometimes, if I wanted to go longer than the usual, I used to smoke a little weed, the good green stuff.

Seriously, give it a try but don’t get too stoned so that you can’t perform at all.


Make it huge....!

Uncut4Big / Mike

tmar,

You didn’t mention whether you’ve had any success in using your well-developed PC muscle to halt your ejaculation, whether when having sex with your girlfriend or when on your own. Even if you have a strong PC muscle, you might need to practice stopping your ejaculation more. Practice on your own if necessary. The alcohol helps me as well. But don’t get dependent on this. I agree with Dino, you should practice edging as well. Again, practice on your own if necessary, or with your girlfriend. She sounds great and understanding. Lucky you!

I’ve been practicing a kind of “Taoist” approach to ejaculation control. The Taoists teach that as a man gets older he should not ejaculate as often. This is why they developed ejaculation control techniques; I think they were less interested in pleasing the women. So I started practicing having sex (or masturbating) without having an orgasm every time. This is extremely difficult, even if you are capable of lasting five or ten or fifteen minutes or whatever. Let’s face it: the biological goal of sex is reproduction, which requires ejaculation (or sufficient leaking). So everything in our nature is compelling us to let go. In fact, those with a premature ejaculation “problem” are probably the most fit, in a Darwinian, reproductive sense. In a primitive state, the guy who takes a long time might not ever get there before another male beats him away, or a large animal scares him off. No doubt, this is why so many men have this problem, to some degree or another.

I’ve got to the point where I can last as long as I want when masturbating. With a chick, it’s a bit harder, but as long as I slow down when necessary I can last a very good while. But I’ve reprogrammed myself not to expect to ejaculate every time. What I’ve noticed is that for the first fifteen or twenty minutes of any session, there is an enormous urge to ejaculate. But after that, this urge subsides significantly, at least for a while. So practice, practice, practice—again, with your own if necessary, or with your girlfriend if she’s cool about it.

There are three additional benefits to not ejaculating every time: One, whereas ejaculating zaps your energy (which is why men famously fall asleep after sex), having sex without ejaculating increases your energy. Again, the Taoists discussed this a lot. I can only compare the experience to having several strong cups of coffee. I’m convinced this raises your testosterone level as well, though I have no evidence of this. I just feel more aggressive. After two or three days of regular sex without ejaculation, I can’t stand it. I become super hyper and aggressive. This is when I know it’s time to bust a nut. Two, you’ll be horny as hell every moment of every day. This is the increased energy thing again. When I’ve had sex without ejaculating, I want to do it again and again and again. Remember, the biological goal is to get that semen in there. We’re just outsmarting mother nature. If I even see an attractive woman, I get an erection. And I have to work very hard not to be distracted by thinking about sex CONSTANTLY. You could literally have sex all day long, if you could find a woman that would go for it. It’s like being a teenager again, even better! Three, when you do ejaculate, the intensity of the orgasm will blow your mind. You can’t have an orgasm that strong if you ejaculate frequently. So it’s definitely worth the wait.

And by the way, I’ve only experienced “blue-balls” once or twice. Hardly at all. Hope this helps.

I used to smoke alittle weed before sex, worked great, lately for some reason it’s not as effective and it’s not like I smoke the shit everyday.

Sounds like your girlfriend is to damn hot. Get a girl that is only good looking enough for you to consider having sex with. This should cure you.


The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

That is so mean, but funny.

After reading her response, I’m thinking maybe you guys are sexual soul mates.


The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

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