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Can't cum while having sex

Bump for anyone else. Fantastic progress.

The last 4 times I’ve had sex, I have cum from penetration each time. The method described above has worked amazingly.

Thought I’d bump this, I’ve turned what I talked about in this thread into a blog and expanded on it, might help some of you guys. See sig

Well I still have this problem but I am inspired by your writing.

I understand you quit using the Grip-of-Death to re-sensitize your sensations,
But did you have to change anything in your mentality? Like additional
Fantasizing during the act, or self-talk for confidence, or anything like that.

Antonio

Originally Posted by antoniorosa
Well I still have this problem but I am inspired by your writing.

I understand you quit using the Grip-of-Death to re-sensitize your sensations,
But did you have to change anything in your mentality? Like additional
Fantasizing during the act, or self-talk for confidence, or anything like that.

Antonio

The mental aspect kind of just sorted itself out once I could cum from thrusting into the fleshlight. Because since that happened I KNEW I’d be able to cum with a woman. Beforehand, I couldn’t imagine feeling pleasure and cumming from thrusting, since it just felt numb. However, once I achieved those wonderful sensations without my hand….I knew I could do it. I became more relaxed…and I didn’t even think about ejaculating, I just tried to make it feel good. I was confident in regards to what speed I liked to thrust etc since I’d practiced by myself and gone completely at my own pace…and felt I was able to be selfish. I’d previously focused a lot on pleasing the woman and not being a bad lay, probably since I had low self esteem etc. However, now since I know I cam cum, it’s more about me….I can relax and just enjoy it, do what I want etc. I wrote a quick bit about it in the blog under the heading sexual anxiety.

Originally Posted by Yataghan50
This is really starting to piss me off.

I wish someone could teach me to cum. I can basically pound away until I’m literally exhausted and frustrated as hell. It sucks seeing your partner enter sexual ecstacy while you feel numb & kind of disconnected from the entire experience…it’s like I’m always being ‘left behind’ during sex. Then when it’s over it’s always the same insecure, awkward question….Why haven’t you cum? I wish I knew the answer! I just cant!

Know this thread is getting a bit long in the tooth but couldn’t help putting my 2 bobs worth in. Yataghan50 I know exactly how you feel. In fact I just came back from a session with a gorgeous ‘working lady’ and in the end she almost got angry I couldn’t cum. I think I totally exhausted her and her hands were aching…all to know avail …damn frustrating!

I guess there’s an age factor here (I’m not a whippersnapper) but still, it shouldn’t be so damned difficult. Erection is fine. In fact this is a problem as I can keep staying hard and bonking merrily away and I almost think the girls would wish me to get soft so they could rest!

Anyway, I ‘m going to investigate this Fleshlight thing and see if I can resensitise things a little.

Lambros prescribes; put your dick in a tighter/wetter vagina.


November 08: BPEL = 6.2

August 09: BPEL = 7.0

Originally Posted by Lambros
Lambros prescribes; put your dick in a tighter/wetter vagina.


I prescribe that the first split on the diagnostic tree for this syndrome is where the intact men branch off from the circumcised ones. Then each branch splits again into “typical” and “something’s unusual/uncomfortable” branches.

People give us something about yourself if you hope for anything meaningful in return.

Yataghan50, How long time did it take for you to make progress?

I’m not sure, probably 2 months…but that was using the fleshlight on and off, experimenting with it quite a bit and ‘relapsing’ into my old death grip masturbation habits. I’d imagine you could progress quicker than that.

When my girlfriend is on top, which is the only position we can do currently (because I have a broken leg). We have sex for 1 to 2 hours however I do not cum. We do not use condoms it’s just that the position isn’t particularly great for guys. All I can say is mess around with positions and find one that is best for you.

To do with condoms making you feel less if your girlfriend/wife/fiancee will let you do anal. Then it will most probably make it a lot easier for you to come, due to it’s a tighter experience. This means you will not have the problem with condoms because it is a lot tighter and it will stimulate your member a lot more. Plus you may not have to wear a condom during this experience.

I know to some people this is taboo and I believe just mentioning to your girlfriend/wife/fiancee it will may get shot down but it is just my opinion. To fix this problem that I to face time to time.

Or you can try different positions due to it will make a large difference on the angle and some positions can make the pussy feel tighter like get her to lie on her side and squeeze her legs together while you are behind her and this will increase the experience for you.

If you masturbate several times a day. Which is what I used to do then you will have conditioned your member, if you carry on you will make it worse. The best thing you can do as many others have mentioned is take a break. One of the problems with conditioning yourself for sex which I haven’t seen anyone mention, is that it may make girlfriend/wife/fiancee very insecure about sex, due to she may start to believe she isn’t good in bed because she cannot make you cum every time. This can mean that she will have less sex with you or may be nervous about having sex with you.


Starting size---->BPEL 7" MEG 5.25"

Goal---->BPEL 8" MEG 6"

Originally Posted by CJskinners
When my girlfriend is on top, which is the only position we can do currently (because I have a broken leg). We have sex for 1 to 2 hours however I do not cum. We do not use condoms it’s just that the position isn’t particularly great for guys. All I can say is mess around with positions and find one that is best for you.

To do with condoms making you feel less if your girlfriend/wife/fiancee will let you do anal. Then it will most probably make it a lot easier for you to come, due to it’s a tighter experience. This means you will not have the problem with condoms because it is a lot tighter and it will stimulate your member a lot more. Plus you may not have to wear a condom during this experience.

I know to some people this is taboo and I believe just mentioning to your girlfriend/wife/fiancee it will may get shot down but it is just my opinion. To fix this problem that I to face time to time.

Or you can try different positions due to it will make a large difference on the angle and some positions can make the pussy feel tighter like get her to lie on her side and squeeze her legs together while you are behind her and this will increase the experience for you.

If you masturbate several times a day. Which is what I used to do then you will have conditioned your member, if you carry on you will make it worse. The best thing you can do as many others have mentioned is take a break. One of the problems with conditioning yourself for sex which I haven’t seen anyone mention, is that it may make girlfriend/wife/fiancee very insecure about sex, due to she may start to believe she isn’t good in bed because she cannot make you cum every time. This can mean that she will have less sex with you or may be nervous about having sex with you.

I still can’t cum from the bottom. The girl I’m with likes to just get it in deep & grind. Just ‘grinding’ does nothing for me, I need the in/out friction..but once this begins she loses the ‘feeling’, kind of like how I lose the feeling if we suddenly stop thrusting and just start to grind.

And I agree with your last paragraph, and it works both ways. It’s a vicious cycle. We don’t want her feeling bad about sex by us not cumming, but if you start thinking about that you put pressure on yourself, and you don’t cum…and it gets worse, you both start thinking about it more, and the hole you’re in gets even deeper….

Yeah I have the same problem with deep grinding. I can’t cum from doing this. The problem is that me and my girlfriend are in a difficult situation, due to I have a broken leg so therefore, I can’t go on top and she gets tired easily so we can’t do any in/out friction or at the least very little, this causing the past 4 days we’ve been sexually active since I’ve been out of hospital I haven’t came.

CJ


Starting size---->BPEL 7" MEG 5.25"

Goal---->BPEL 8" MEG 6"

Can you manage sideways? With the cast and all? :)


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avocet8

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