Junkie pushes penis pills
Around noon today I was walking down the sidewalk in Seattle’s Capitol Hill neighborhood when this man walked by from the other direction with a plastic shopping bag. He was probably in his thirties, thin, dirty, missing a few teeth, and stank. As he approached me he reached in the bag, pulls out a box of Enzyte and says “hey dude, wanna buy some penis pills?” I laughed, said “no thanks” and walked a few steps. But then I thought something like “wait, what kind of Thunder’s member am I if I don’t inquire further?” and walked back to where the dude was pestering a man at a pay phone.
I said, “hey, let me see what you got in there.” He says, “man, you know what these are? This is 200 dollars worth of pills. I’ll sell ‘em to you for 50.” He started pulling out the pills as the guy at the pay phone is watching us, wondering what the hell I was doing talking to the junkie.
The bag included two boxes of Enzyte, a bottle of ProSolution, and another bottle of something that I remember said something like “Men’s Club,” but I can’t find it on the web so far.
I said, “nah, I don’t want any. Those things don’t work.” And the junkie says with a slurred voice, “THEY DON’T? Reeeeally? What do they doooo?” I said, “they make it seem like your dick’s harder, but they don’t make it bigger.” And the guy looks at the bag for a second, then pulls out two boxes of Enzyte and says: “okay…I’ll sell you these two for 20.” I just shook my head no and walked away.
It was all just really surreal. Among other things, I’ve been wondering where he stole the pills.
Last edited by Ike : 04-19-2006 at .